Are today's mothers failing?

Question

In their pursuit of independence and juggling both careers and family, are today's moms failing to instill the right family values in their kids?If not then why are so many marriages heading to the rocks?

Answer 1

I don't think a woman with a career causes her marriage to fall apart.. I think people don't take marriage as seriously and marry for the wrong reasons resulting in divorce.. and also, many people just don't try.. they give up on relationships over trivial things. Marriage doesn't = love anymore... it's about.. "oh my friends are doing it so I should...." or "I'm 30 it's time to get married"...

also.. there are no statistics proving that stay at home moms have children with values and working moms do not..

Answer 2

Raising children is the responsibility of BOTH parents which means instilling good values and demonstrating them by example falls on Dad as well as Mom.
In the not so distant past (in the western world) many men didn't have to juggle career and family. The guys went out to paid work; the women stayed home -- and worked -- 24/7 by the way, with NO salary or benefits, so NO paid vacations, sick leave or pension plans!
These days many families can't make ends meet without two incomes. Mom's aren't always working outside the home because they want to; a lot HAVE to!
Part of "right family values" means that every person in the family is valued and respected as a unique and contributing individual; no one is a slave or a servant. And money doesn't buy you out of your parenting (being there) responsibility.
In other words, in spite of the so-called "Golden Rule" ("He who has the gold makes the rules."), in an ideal world, women or men could be pursuing careers or staying home or combining both -- and parenting.
I think that it's important for parents to spend time with their (especially young but also older) children rather than handing their offspring over to institutions for most of their waking hours. (School starts soon enough and eats up a huge chunk of the kids' day!)
And don't forget: in the (not so) "olden days", the extended family -- grandparents, a sibling or other relative -- was there to provide childcare.
So, in answer to your question: NO. Mothers aren't necessarily failing any more than fathers might be.
Marriages are failing because people don't really know each other (hopes, dreams, values) before rushing to the altar. They don't communicate openly and honestly. And they're too quick to throw in the towel if something doesn't seem to be running smoothly, rather than digging in and working it out.

Answer 3

It isn't the mothers job to instill values
It is the Parents job to instill values.

In the absence of 2 parents we do our best.

My daughters are both absolutely amazing while growing up not having a "traditional" family. We both do our best to be fair and keep our personal differences away from the girls.

Marriages head towards the rocks for a number of reasons - infidelity is huge - but laziness is likely a bigger cause.

I truly believe that mothers (for the most part) do there absolute best for their kids, while us guys have held on to the "do it for me - I'm number one" old school mentallity.

Perhaps many marriages fail because women have more of the same oppurtunities men have and take advantage of that, while men have insisted on remaining in the past.

Don't blame the mom - blame the parents. (and for God's sake - please don't blame society - it is the responsibilty of parents and to a lesser extent, extended family to instill values of decency in their children.

(can some one PLEASE tell me where the parents of those wingnuts in california were during the formative years. I'm referring to the stampede for a video game where people were trampled)

Answer 4

How children end up depends on both parents not just the mom. I know a lot of moms that would love to stay at home and take care of their kids, but just can't in this day and age. So it's in the quality time that both parents spend with their children. As for divorce well to many people believe divorce is just away of life any more, and men and women are both guilty. So it really is shallow to blame just one gender. Please to many people just give up any more, why try and make it work if you can just give up and run from your problems right. In the mean while you just create bigger ones. I'm not saying there aren't real reason to get a divorce, but there are a lot of really lame ones out there to.

Answer 5

Alot of mothers think they have to be able to do it all on their own.
They think they have to prove to the world they can do it all alone.
They fall into this thinking which is pushed onto women by society.
If you are out in the work field you have to fight with all means.
But a family is more than just dragging up the kids behind you.
An indepent women knows that she has to keep the family together, and to teach all of her kids (that goes for the man to) to work as a unit if they all want to make it work. I think women forget that years ago three generations would live together in one house hold. All worked together to keep the family save. As our society tends to send our old to homes, we dont have that support anymore. Our society has changed but out men are slow to change. They need to see that they are needed dearly by their loved ones.
How many times do you see people with hard lives, and if you ask them what the missed in their younger years, most say thier fathers.
So maybe the question should be if mothers are failing to include the fathers in the lives of the children.

Answer 6

To start with. Why are you blaming moms? Fathers are just has responsible for a child's up bring as we moms are. And has far has marriage goes why do you think it is the woman failure to do something that causes the down fall of them?I do agree that some of today's mothers are failing their children.

Answer 7

I don't they are failing in todays world. A mother can have both career an family. Without neglecting family and values

Answer 8

Have you ever been married? You teach your kids by example and by being a parent. It takes both parents, not just the mother. You can't blame the woman. Today a woman has to work to help ends meet. And, too, a lot of people don't know what they are getting into when they get married.

Answer 9

it isnt just today,,,it has always been,,,they just didnt talk about it then,,all you can hope is that you do the best you can and that others do too,blaming women for working and not staying at home is a pretty moot point considering many families now need that extra income just to survive,not live,blame the government for taking away everything that was taken for granted back then,,jobs men could do and raise a family on for a start.despite what is said,,it is not an ideal world with everything at our fingertips.

Answer 10

dosent have anything to do with kids or a career. its easier for people to bail out of a marriage than to make it work. many people are selfish cowards. married or otherwise. its not just married women..many people have failing relationships bc they just don't want to put in the time.