I know that whenever a friend is going through something stressful or bothersome you should provide a "listening ear" (as you would want the favour returned) but why is it that whenever I give a listening ear a particular friend, after listening to her I feel so stressed or depressed myself. I hate feeling this way. Has anyone else ever felt this way or is it just me?
2006-11-18 04:19:17 · 6 answers · asked by Lady Mandeville 6 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
You have no personal boundaries. You do not have to be her source of feel better. She is sucking you dry. Read or listen to the tapes of Carolyn Myss the 7 archetypes. You NEED to be aware of what is happening to you. You can get this from the library. She is a classical example of one of the types. and you are to. Neither of you are wrong. This is an opportunity for you to grow and develop your self to live life to the fullest. In the mean time visualize a Very bright golden glow over all of you an even brighter white light under this light. Over top of these eggs of light surrounding you have another layer of a thick impenetrable mirror. WEAR THIS ON YOUR BE-ING ALL THE TIME DAY AND NIGHT ALL-WAYS VISUALIZE THIS 24-7. Make it as thick as you can. If you see any chinks in this fill it and fix it.
2006-11-18 04:37:36 · answer #1 · answered by iamonetruth 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a listening ear to many, I feel your pain.
It's either because:
a) I end up empathizing with the person.
b) I get annoyed because I feel the person is doing something REALLY crazy but I can't stop him/her.
c) Some people are a stuck record. It's the same drama over and over again. ((GET OVER IT, PEOPLE! YEESH!))
d) I wonder if anyone will listen to me, since I'm doing so much listening, most friends end up unloading on me and therefore, I can't really unload because I'm expected to be strong.
it's perfectly normal. Don't hate it too much. In fact, I think you can be proud for giving many people that gift of love, the power of the listening ear.
However, if you really need a break, take one. And more importantly, find some other company, preferably older, wiser and discreet company, who can handle the times YOU need an ear to balance things out. Not only will they have the strength to listen, chances are they'll have the capacity to advise you to a better conclusion rather than mere sweet nothings.
God bless.
2006-11-18 12:25:40 · answer #2 · answered by Studier Alpha 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Could it be, at least in part, due to the possibility that you do not receive the same benefit from others? This is not to be critical, but if you give too much without having your own needs met, this can be very stressful.
2006-11-18 12:30:07 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You probably feelsad because you can't really help her with her situation. You may feel that it would be easier for her to solve her problems without your help.
It probably rubs off on you - the feeling of not being able to cope with life's problems.
2006-11-18 12:27:22 · answer #4 · answered by Stareyes 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The personalities and moods of others transfer themselves onto others. Surround yourself with miserable people and you end up becoming miserable yourself.
2006-11-18 12:21:17 · answer #5 · answered by finestambiguity 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, same arround with me. And when I can't help somoene, I just whisper and pray " God help him/her".
2006-11-18 17:55:29 · answer #6 · answered by invisible1 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋