My friend was in debt last year and I offered some money to help her out. She paid back some of it but still owes me quite a lot. I haven't seen or heard from her for nearly a year now. Am I being mean in thinking that maybe she isn't such a good friend of mine. How long should I expect to wait for payback or shall I just leave it and learn the hard way not to lend money again. Thanks.
2006-11-17 22:35:26 · 41 answers · asked by kizzy 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
leave it and learn from the experience hunny -sorry you got used in this way xx
2006-11-17 22:36:53 · answer #1 · answered by mousie 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Rule 1, never loan friends money. Now that your on the back side of that, I would definately get in touch with this person and in no uncertain terms tell friend you expect to be paid back by a certain date and get into the specifics of when, how much etc. After all, if you dont let the friend think that the repayment of the debt is important, why should they? And for future reference, always remember that pay back in any and all circumstances, has to be immediate. In otherwords, never go putting out anything with the expectation that you will be getting your returns at some point in the future. Usually never happens.
2006-11-17 23:00:16 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
She cant think that much of you to not speak to you for nearly a year. and I would suspect that its because she doesnt want to / hasnt got the money to pay you back. either way it is not acceptable. Its terrible when people dont pay back what they owe. If someone lends me a pound they get it back.
Its difficult to advice you because it really depends on how much she owes you. If it is a serious amount of money then I would see if you can contact her and ask for it back, if she still doesn't pay I would see a solicitor about it. If it is the amount of money that you can afford to loose I would just learn from it and not bother with that friend again.
2006-11-17 23:00:50 · answer #3 · answered by sianmog 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Learn the hard way and never lend money that you don't expect to ever get back. I've done it.....
I've learned to tell people to go to the bank and get a loan, oh, they can't do that? Then why would I loan them money when the bank won't? That's right - they are a bad credit risk and the chances of ever seeing any money from the transaction are very slight....
If you ever do again loan money, set the payment terms upfront, xx amount on a monthly basis or else.
Also, if you really want to, you can always take her to court to try to get your money back. It was a loan and they are responsible for it!
One more thing, to me, the easiest way to lose a friend is to loan them money. Just my lessons I have learned in my life......
2006-11-17 22:44:20 · answer #4 · answered by brian c 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I take it that this funds became no longer a lump sum,and it became a ton right here and there. Did you supply him it? Did it supply help to on the time,like on weekend we could say, once you fancied a lager? Over what length of time? Come on while you're stable friends this happens in existence, needless to say you probably did no longer choose it then and you will desire to have executed something back then approximately it, you may no longer drag it back out now. Has he no longer paid his debt back in different tactics, cheered you up, made you snigger,executed you some favours, somebody you have been able to have confidence. permit it pass,stop clinging directly to it only reason you choose some funds and you haven't any longer have been given it,thats existence. I reckon his spouse does comprehend,and that i'm hoping they have a stable snigger approximately it, cos we could face it you cant be a stable chum, while you're keeping it against him nevertheless.
2016-10-15 17:04:40 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sweetie....money can come between friends...i did the same, i lent a huge amount to a mate...we kept it to ourselves because she felt embarrassed about asking me for it, so i never mentioned it to anyone, she was paying me back in monthly installments, then it stopped...i let it slide for about 2 months then i called her and asked her if she was ok, and would she start paying me my money back....she said i was on her case and i would have to wait...errrr i don't think so....i waited long enough, i was kind enough to bail her out of her s*it, so the least she could do was pay it back...in the end i got so tired of waiting i told her to keep the money and to shove it up her ***....and never to ask me for anything again....it was the best 3 grand i have ever spent because it stopped her from sponging from me, now she's moved onto other people and is doing exactly the same thing with them...just seems that she needs to stop buying shoes and handbgs and pay off her credit cards....we dont see each other any more...thats how i want it to stay...
in your case you may never see your money again, so i suggest that you quit lending people money...if this is how they treat you, then i think you should find friends that you can trust, also stop lending money out....you are the one who's losing out, not them...lending this money out is a valuable lesson to you...just don't do it any more....it's not worth it, you helped and this is the payback you got....i think it is so unfair on your behalf
people still ask me for money but i just i don't have any...simple as....
2006-11-17 23:05:48 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I myself think you will NOT see your money. I would just chalk it up as education. I am also in the same position but mine is just chump change. $15.00 here $50.00 there, $20.00 to another person. BUT of the three I have just mentioned I am waiting for any of the three to come looking for more money. But I also go with the adage never loan out more than you can afford to lose. I hope you get your money back. I think you should also look this person up and confront them. Legal action sounds like it would be your word against theirs. They are not a friend in any way shape or form. But again confront them. At least they will know where they stand with you.
2006-11-17 22:57:09 · answer #7 · answered by GRUMPY 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sad to say,I'm in the same boat-and am owed a fair bit! This loan (which was promised to be paid back the following week) is now a few years old,and unfortunately,when I was struggling financially and asked for at least part payment,all I got was abuse! I decided I've played the 'nice girl' for too damned long,and have since informed her husband (who she asked me to keep the loan secret from) and her family of the money owed-and how she reacted when I asked for repayment. I damn well will get my money-I have a child to take care of,and I will not allow her to be denied because this person won't honour their debts.
Be strong and face that person telling them you helped them out when they were in need-the very least you are entitled to is the repayment of the money owed.
This person has not been a good friend to you-so it's time to be matter of fact and demand payment.
2006-11-17 22:47:30 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
wow wow this is one subject that makes my blood boils instantly. "Borrow Money" is a curse. Because of it, I have lost lots of "friends" and of course my hard earned money. The very moment your friend (listen to this people) opened his mouth to ask to borrow your money, you have already lost either your friend, your money or both!!. See, before he asks, he has already short listed you as some one who has the money to give. IF YOU DON'T GIVE - may be because you don't have the money , the guy is going to be unhappy thinking that you simply don't want to help him out. IF YOU GIVE - he won't pay back(lost money), when you demand that he pays, he will be annoyed and that may well be the end of your friendship(friend lost). After having learnt a bitter lesson (as have you), I give a small portion of the amount asked for borrowing. Say, if 30 bucks is asked for, give the person(friend?) 15 bucks and tell him there is no need to pay back. Seal it up by saying " Very sorry , I can't give what you ask for". Your friend will not pay you back, even if he is still living next door. You have learnt the hard way.If the amount owed is big, hire a thug to collect it for you.
2006-11-17 22:55:06 · answer #9 · answered by seeker 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
There's an unwritten rule - never lend money to friends, it almost always ends in disaster as you have found out. It may be cruel but I never have & never will lend to friends.
By all means demand she pay you back, if she refuses then you haven't lost a friend because she wasn't a friend in the first place!
2006-11-17 22:52:11 · answer #10 · answered by C Greene 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think you should expect every cent you lent her back, but probably the sad fact is you will probably never see that money now that she has not been in your life for a year. May see a lawyer and send a scare letter to her saying you want your money back. It amazing what a scare letter can do.
2006-11-17 22:42:30 · answer #11 · answered by MJane21 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋