My dilemma is in whether or not I should reveal the crush at the end of the semester (after grades have been turned in). (I respect teachers a great deal and I am aware of the ethical boundary that cannot be passed, if I reveal my crush I do not intend to act on it). I hesitate because I will be a student in his department next semester (but not in his class), and my imagination tells me that I might already be that student that gets talked about in the teachers lounge (paranoia?). So, I ask what others think are the benefits and risks of revealing my crush?
2006-11-17 17:02:31 · 10 answers · asked by curiouser 1 in Education & Reference ➔ Teaching
I mean benefits in the "pro" vs. con sense.
2006-11-17 17:12:19 · update #1
I mean to reveal my crush to my teacher, not the class, no one in the class knows. Again, I would wait until grades have been turned in (to ensure I worked for my grade).
2006-11-17 17:14:25 · update #2
He is not married, don't know if he is or isn't interested.
2006-11-17 17:15:54 · update #3
I have managed to keep low-key on this, it is possible that he suspects the crush, but I don't think he knows for certain. There have been several instances in which he would not enter an elevator unless there were other people besides he and I. Don't know what that is about, don't know what to think of it.
2006-11-17 17:24:12 · update #4
You're both adults, so act accordingly! and if you do not intend to act on your "crush", then keep it to yourself!!!
2006-11-17 18:04:26 · answer #1 · answered by toubab 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have had the same problem. I had a huge crush on one of my professors. I am 33 and he was around the same age... no kids and never been married. I was attracted to him, and I'm definate that he was attracted to me. I would catch him watching me, and whatever I turned in, her was very positive. During a class debate, I even saw him taking aiming his camera phone at me.
I say, if he is available, and you can sense a mutual attraction, go for it! I would definately wait until grades post. But the entire semester was fun because I would dress nicely and try to do sudle things to flirt without my class mates noticing.
He began to talk about politics and controversial types issues, and I became turn-off by the end of the semester. The crush was cute and fun while it lasted... I say wait. You're feelings may change by the end as did mine. At any rate...have fun!
2006-11-17 17:17:04 · answer #2 · answered by tyrawooley 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You can't reveal crush unless you want other students thinking you get preferential treatment. Did you really deserve that A or did you do something for it? The negative will be if you do reveal crush after you are done with his class people will still wonder. I can't see any plus side except you would get to live out your fantasy if he says yes I thought about you too. Let's take this in my office.
2006-11-17 17:12:06 · answer #3 · answered by ♥c0c0puffz♥ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't reveal your crush. Some things are better left unsaid. Because I liked some instructors kind of crush-like I did a few things (just some of my actions) that I have felt embarrased about, even now, years later.
To you it is a secret and you want to reveal it, the benefit would be to get it out in the open and thus off your mind; this is too risky. Don't stir up trouble.
2006-11-17 17:15:29 · answer #4 · answered by Goldenrain 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How big is this crush? I think it's smart to wait until the semester is over. To be politically correct. However, Don't let it be a woulda,coulda or shoulda...
There is nothing wrong for letting your feelings be known and being true to yourself. I wish we could all be that way and not let our insecurities take us over.
Best of luck from a former chicken little. ;)
2006-11-17 17:10:21 · answer #5 · answered by princesssanctuary 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had a crush on the TA in one of my classes..... I told her about it the following semester....... she was such a hottie........ Portuguese woman with these killer eyes...... wow
anyway....... she thought it was sweet and we talked a lot...... I used to stop by her office....... nothing happened because I was married..... about a year later I was divorced and I looked her up... she had gone back home
Tell him ... there is no harm in it... you are both adults if he is interested then it is a plus for u both..... if not .... well it wont be tough to move on
keep those special thoughts though
2006-11-17 17:25:10 · answer #6 · answered by imwatch420 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, there are several unanswered questions. (1) is he married (2) do you think he knows you're interested? (3) do you think he is interested? (4) why in the world would you express your interest and then not act on it-are you hoping he will act on your admission?
If you truly do not intend to act on your desires-then DO NOT tell him-under any circumstances it will not go well.
2006-11-17 17:09:01 · answer #7 · answered by dulcrayon 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're 36, not 16, aren't you?
But looking for BENEFITS?
Maybe he likes you too, and you can be happy together. If you reveal your "crush" to him there can be a "yes" or a "no"
So what? You don't have anything to lose.
But I won't be looking for BENEFITS...then forget about it...
2006-11-17 17:07:53 · answer #8 · answered by Maybe YAP again 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
for me, dont reveal. just let it fade. coz unless youre out of the university you can never have a relationship with your teacher
you can either wait till you have finished or just forget it. its my opinion... but i dunno... it depends on youre culture. so try looking into your heart, and try to see if its really something you'd want that teacher and most probably everyone (rumors will pop up) to know.
please think this thru...
2006-11-17 17:15:09 · answer #9 · answered by J.C. Philippines 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
give in and be happy. I am happily married to my professor
and im almost 40
2006-11-17 17:45:45 · answer #10 · answered by dawn_horger 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋