Should I tell my parents I WAS pregnant?

Question

I am 13 now, but I was 12 when I was raped and became pregnant. I lost the baby two months into pregnancy. Their are only two people that know about this and that is God and me! Should I tell my parents?????????

Answer 1

You're the only one who can judge how your parents would react, but it isn't good to keep this hidden. Unless you deal with this, it will affect how you relate to others from now on. I've seen this happen. Please, if nothing else, call a rape crisis center and talk with someone there. This is something an adult can't deal with on her own, and it's not the sort of thing a 12/13 year old should bear alone. And no reasonable person would expect you to, either. Yes, it will upset your parents greatly, but knowing that you should ask yourself if they would really be upset with YOU? If I heard this, I'd be upset and frustrated that I couldn't have done anything to protect you. That's what's usually (or should be) foremost in a parent's mind with a child your age. Telling them may make it easier to arrange logistical things like transportation to counseling or support group sessions. Let them know this is important to you, and it's what they can do to help you now. If your parents are decent people, tell them that you need their help. Please don't carry this burden any farther alone.

Answer 2

First of all I am so sorry that happened to you. I am equally glad that you lost the baby--I know it sounds harsh, but you are way too young to have to deal with any of this. I think you need to tell your parents about the rape and miscarriage because it is their job to take care of you and make sure you get the medical care and counselling you need to recover from this tragedy. Plus, the rape can still be reported. You can't let this go--it is a crime and the bastard who did this to you will do it again if he is not stopped. Even if you think you are OK, you need to realize that what happened to you needs therapy--this is something that will haunt you for the rest of your life if you don't get the emotional help for it now. Please tell your parents and get the help you need.

Answer 3

I wouldnt tell my parents but I would definitely get some kind of emotional counseling whether thru a rape crisis hotline or school counselor that can lead you to a friendly and understanding person to help you deal with the rape. Then once you became more settled with what happened then perthaps you can open up to your prents. Since we dont know what your relationship with your parents is...it could backfire and they could do the whole blaming it on you because of your behavior and such. IF you and your parents are close then by all means tell them. Good luck and bless you.

Answer 4

I am very sorry that someone violated you. It must be a terrible burden coping with this tragedy alone and trying to reconcile in your own mind what happened to you. I would say that it is almost impossible for a young mind to make sense of this event and the support of others whether they are your parents or not is definitely going to be a help for you.
If you don't have the right support, the legacy of this event will haunt your adulthood and change the way in which you deal with men. This trauma will effect the way you see men and it will have a negative effect on your male relationships. Something as horrible as this can cause depression and a form of post traumatic stress syndrome. If we leave tragedies like this in the depths of our minds, they will begin to haunt us in the most unexpected ways.
Please go and seek some help (hopefully, professional) so that this doesn't have a bigger effect on the rest of your life. It has stolen a piece of your self esteem and innocence. It is time for you to reclaim your sense of well being and not let the legacy of this event continue to darken your happiness and future. You may think that you are strong and you don't think it is effecting you but by seeking help, you have nothing to loose. If you don't seek help, it may taint a bright future.

Answer 5

Well that depends. I know everyone is saying, yes yes yes tell em oh my god! but seriously think about this. Are your parents understanding and are they kind to you? People have to remember that not every parent Is a good parent, if i were to tel my dad something like that when i was young, i would have been in deep trouble, no need to explain, but he would definitely think it was my fault and absolutely no good would come of telling him. But if you feel like you can tell your parents and they could help you emotionally through this then you can tell them, but tell them if YOU want too, and if it is safe for you to do so. I have kept very serious things from my parents, because of how my parents are, so it really depends on your situation and family. And just remember telling them EVERYHTING is not always the best thing for everyone. . .Good luck

Answer 6

once you tell your mom: a million. stay calm 2. Write a letter in case you want to three. Make a plan formerly 4. in case you plan to proceed the being pregnant, be particular about the destiny. clarify the way you’ll end college, grant for the toddler, etc. 5. convey a supportive chum or relative alongside 6. tell her first--don’t enable them listen it someplace else 7. If she freaks out, go away for somewhat and are available decrease back later. with somewhat of luck they could have calmed down a touch Telling your mom you're pregnant is between the hardest belongings you'll do. you may want to experience scared, ashamed, embarrassed, anxious, worrying, or depressed. you may want to experience like you've enable them down or that she will be able to by no potential forgive you. Please bear in mind that no count number what their initial reaction is, this reaction will maximum likely replace over the years, in case you protect a aspect of adulthood and stay calm. purely purely be confident you're making a decision about the being pregnant formerly you tell them and don’t enable their rigidity of that of different kinfolk replace what you want to do, no matter if or not they lay some heavy guilt or shame onto you. that is your body and your determination and ultimately, you'd be the single to regulate it, not them. purely stay calm, stay concentrated, and practice your self for inspite of lies ahead.

Answer 7

Yes.. if you are questioning if you should- you should just do it. Think of the pro's and con's... they can get you help and/or councling or just be there to be supportive... unless they are totally nuts and not like that... i sure hope not.. but anyways... YOU NEED TO TELL SOMEONE. if you can't tell your parents or anyone in your family- tell someone else- call a councelor.. talk to someone at school.. tell a friends mom.. anyone... this is something very serious and the rape alone will cause you trauma for the rest of your life- let alone rape and a pregnancy and a lost pregnancy... please go tell someone what happened!

Answer 8

Yes I think you should tell your parents you did nothing wrong.
If something happens to you and you have to go the hospital and they do a pelvic exam they can tell that you were pregnant at one time. What if they ask your parents when you were pregnant.
They will be shocked. I think you should tell you parents this is to much for a girl your age to deal with. Even an adult has a hard time dealing with something like this. So go for it and tell them.

Answer 9

I think it's wonderful that you are seeking support from this forum after such a tramatic experience. That being said, only you can ultimately decide if and when to tell them and when the time would be right.

I would recommend making a list of positives and negatives resulting from telling/not telling them. This might aid you in your decision-making process.

Good luck to you, whatever you decide.....

Answer 10

Wow, poor thing. Yeah, tell your parents. I know you have gone through a lot and don't mean to lecture, but you should have told them and the cops when it happened. The guy will either be back for you or do it to some other poor inicent child. You have a lot to handle right now both emotionally and physically. Did you see the doctor after you lost the baby.... this can cause long term problems w/ the capapbitlity to get pregnant and stay pregnant.