I recently found a email dated in August that my husabnd forgot to delete telling his ex-wife how much he loves her and thinks about her everyday, they do not have any children together, their marriage only lasted a little over a year. I confronted him about the email as I was very upset, he said he wants to be be with me and that he knows it would never work with her. We have been married for 5 years, is this some kind of emotional affair?
2006-11-17 04:56:21 · 20 answers · asked by LadyNaomi 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I'd be pretty upset, myself.
To be honest, I think that you need to get to the bottom of the reason why they are still exchanging emails.
Have they been having an affair while he's been married to you?
What's going on? You need to hire a PI and get the real scoop because you obviously can't trust your husband to tell you...
2006-11-17 05:01:28 · answer #1 · answered by Angela 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he has no ties to her(kids), then why is he in contact with her? You have every right to question him, and his motives. I cannot say if this is an emotional affair, as I don't know what was in the email. He should be over her, seeing as you two have been married for 5 years, past is past. You need to question him again and ask what he expects to get out of this(friendship, emotional). Why would he say that he knows it wouldn't work with her? That is a strange thing to say...ask him about that. Good luck! :)
2006-11-17 05:03:15 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess a man that got caught with his hand in a cookie jar will say anything to get out of an arugement especially when he was busted so hard! Your husband probably is confused right now between you and his ex wife. Ask him if he wants to go and be with her and save you the aggravation of stress that hes already putting on you at this moment for his love letter that you had to find! Now if that was my future husband i would have asked him to prove it to me by calling her right in front of me just to see how he would handle the situation. It must be difficult on you and a shock.
He wouldn't be dwelling on his ex wife trying to have an internet affair with her if there was some reason why he still dwells on her. Is this a one way relationship between the two of you or hes mature enough to at least act like he is moving on with you and only you. Ask him is he wants his space to gather his true feeling for either his ex wife or you. Thats the only way it will end this high stress level if you start searching for the answers so he won't stray on you and remain faithful like a husband should be to any wife they are with now!
2006-11-17 05:22:31 · answer #3 · answered by Damzel in distrust 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How and why did their marriage end??? He probably does know it would never work with her and he does love you, but it sounds like he never had closure or his questions answered. You need to be in a calm state and go somewhere to talk. Let him know you love him but that you deserve the same kind of love and respect that you have given him. Also, tell him that you deserve all of his heart and he needs to talk to someone about his "unfinished" business. Be firm and not wishy washy.
Do you want this marriage to work? Then do all you can to get this situation settled.
Is he willing to go and talk to someone? I would recommend talking to a Pastor or a Marriage Counselor. Someone looking from the outside may be able to assist him in seeing how he is playing with fire and he has a great woman right in front of him.
God Bless!
2006-11-17 05:09:23 · answer #4 · answered by kymmy_kins 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lady You have this man in some sort of a way. But there is something this woman use to do that you are not doing. Instead of comfronting him with anger understand that he is only human. Have you never been with a person and think of someone else who you once cared for. Just let him know you are with him and he needs to get with you and leave the past behind. What is it that he is longing for check yourself , you are a Lady get the respect you deserve you are a Queen and he is your King make him feel like one !! Peace
2006-11-17 05:07:39 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would consider it as one. If my husband did this I would confront him about it and tell him that if he still isnt over his ex then he has no reason to be with me or anyone else for that matter and that he needs to get his affairs and emotions in order and until then I will be staying (or he could go stay) elsewhere.
2006-11-17 04:59:56 · answer #6 · answered by Sarah K 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It can't really be an affair if she (the Ex) is not reciprocating. However, RED flags are flying up everywhere in my mind concerning your husband. Something is not right and that e-mail is just a symptom of it.
2006-11-17 05:00:29 · answer #7 · answered by Poppet 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well sure it is. Its like he looks at you as second best and is only with you because it wont work with her. I'd be really pissed and would totally re-evaluated the whole relationship/marriage. I want to be with a man who thinks that not only am I the first choice but the only choice.
2006-11-17 05:05:18 · answer #8 · answered by JustMe 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to go into counselling. That is too weird. I hope he is being honest with you, but it still sounds like he wasn't able to move on completely in the emotional sphere.
2006-11-17 04:59:50 · answer #9 · answered by Carrie H 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think maybe if u find anymore emails u should see a counselor i know they dint solve everything but theres obviously something inside him that makes him miss her. also theres always the deleted button inwhich u can see what he deleted so u wouldnt see. i would be extreamly careful.
2006-11-17 04:59:02 · answer #10 · answered by ..::..Lovin him..::.. 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋