I need advice from mothers out there.?

Question

I have a baby boy on the way. They are thinking I am due sometime in the middle of feb. I am very scared about giving birth and raising a child by myself. Do any mothers have any advice they can give me to help me through this?

Answer 1

Sweetie, you will be fine. Like the other mothers said, lean on what support system of friends and family that you have, I am sure that they will be there for you.
When your baby is here you will know that you can do it. Just look into his beautiful eyes and see the love shining there, you can do it!
And as the one mother said, sleep when he does!
The best advice I can give any mother, in any circumstance is to breastfeed your baby. This creates a bond like no other. In all the things that I have done in my life, nursing my babies was the most fullfilling and gave me the most joy. Not only that, it will help you get your figure back faster, it gives him immunity to so many things ( he will not get sick!), it is cheaper, WAY cheaper than formula and SO much better for him. When you want to go somewhere you can grab a diaper and be out the door. YOU are all he needs to be full and happy! It is a great feeling and will make you feel like you have done something amazing. And you have! Also, you can tuck that little guy in with you at night and you can both get more sleep. Let him nurse when he wants to and sleep the rest of the time! I know....it worked for me and 5 babies. I nursed them all for well over a year. Just remember to eat when he does, and drink when he does, sleep when he does! Do not use his nap time to try to get things done. You will wear yourself out!
Take care and feel free to write to me if I can be of any help.
Love and Blessings to you and that precious baby!
Lady T~

Answer 2

Alot of people are gonna give you advice on how to bring up your child and I would just say to you that you will learn by your own instincts how to take care of your child on your own. You don't necesarrily have to do what everybody else thinks is ok. In the first few months, you will have some sleepless nights but your body and mind will adapt. If you don't find yourself adapting and feel like you are not doing so well, there should be support groups where you live or if not, there are alot of single mom sites on the internet that may be able to help you. Where I live, there are support and playgroups and library programs that are open for children from ages of 0, these are good programs where you can talk to other mothers and relate your experiences and also, its a chance for your child to interact without other babies and also learn new things. Get help from your family if you can or if you can't, don't put too much expectation on yourself, do as much as you can, but if you don't finish things like household duties, do them later. When you have your beautiful baby boy, you won't ever look back and alot of things that mattered before, won't matter anymore! You will concentrate more on bringing up your child and giving your boy a happy life. You can purchase baby clothes and other items on clearance. If you need help financially, look on the internet for single parent support groups that can direct you to where you can find this assistance. As for the birth, its a wonderful experience. Once you have the baby in your arms, you won't worry about the pain. Just don't ever panic, breathe and don't listen to people's horror stories. I was on my feet for two hours with contractions pacing from the hospital room bathroom to my hospital room, and then I had the baby(on the bed, not the toilet)! It was my first baby and I was so happy when I saw her! Don't focus on the birth, focus on getting stuff ready for the baby and other things that may ease your mind. Also, after the birth, you will need someone to help you as you will still be recovering from the birth. Give yourself at least a 6 week recovery period and try not to do too much during this time. Good luck and all the best with your new baby!

Answer 3

You will be fine.
The birth is scary, but it is a natural process that your body will be in control of, just listen to what it tells you to do and remember to breathe...
As for after the birth, accept all offers of help and join some mom and baby groups. Even if you are really shy, these are great things that will get you out and let you have an 'adult conversation'.
For the first few months, it is easier to have everything to hand, so go out and bulk buy things like washing powder/liquid- make sure that is is non-bio, and if you can, start freezing meals. You are probably going to be too tired to want to cook when your baby saps your energy (I'm not trying to be negative, you will sometimes get too tired to cook) so whilst you are able to make more than normal and put the rest in the freezer to defrost and heat through.
Have a few trusted friends and let them look after your baby when you are feeling really tired so you can rest.
Nap when baby naps.

You will start finding your own way sooner than you know. I know that you are not alone in this. You will get through this and before you know it, you will be looking at your child when (s)he is all grown up. It will be okay...you are going to get through this and are stronger than you think you can be.

Answer 4

2 things you can do:
#1 - give the child up for adoption. It sounds harsh but if you're not ready for this, it's probably the best thing for the baby. Trust me, i am the single mother of 2 daughters and i just had a son and i'm 38 and i wasn't ready to do it again, all over, by myself. So i gave my son up for adoption. It was hardest thing i ever did but i know it was the RIGHT thing to do.
#2 - Deal with it, you'll do FINE and if you have a good family and good friends, they will help you through this.
Whatever your decision is, just be confident and don't be scared! People do this alone ALL the time. I did it TWICE (once the dad was there for a minute but the other 2 i was ALONE, with the help of friends and family and i got through it.)
Good luck and believe in yourself!!!

Answer 5

The best piece of advice I can pass on is to keep one word on your mind at all times...relax. I'm not talking about laying around or getting massages. I'm talking about your mental state. A pregnant woman with a relaxed mind will be able to deal with the aches, pains, worries, concerns, fears that come along with all of the joys of pregnancy. A relaxed mind and body will help you have a more pleasant and tolerable labor and delivery, and a relaxed mind will better handle the sleep loss, routine adjustments, and extra chores that come with being a new parent. Besides once you meet your baby (it's just like all of those cliches) you are going to love your baby so much that all the nervousness and work and anything else that will come with being a new parent is so worth it.
My second piece of advice would be to savor every minute and enjoy being a parent thru the hard times and the easy times. Good luck and congratulations!!!

Answer 6

It's tough regardless if your single or not. Don't worry though, you'll pull through. I have a lot of friends who are single moms and they've done fine without the father being active in their kids lives. Just don't let this child discourage you in pursuing the goals you've always wanted to accomplish. It'll take you a little longer to get that job you wanted or finish school, but it's not impossible. I have a friend who got married at an early age and her ex-husband was such a jerk that she divorced him. He's a deadbeat dad. Their daughter is now 11 and my friend is an labor & delivery RN (registered nurse). She's still single, but she just bought herself a new car and a new house -- all without the support of her ex or anyone else. The ex just recently saw their daughter this past summer, which is sad because he hasn't seen her in about 8 or 9 years. After this, he still doesn't want to be an active part of the child's life. The only reason why he saw her was because his mom keeps in touch with their daughter and wanted to see her grand daughter so badly. If it wasn't for his mom, he wouldn't have bothered.

Answer 7

i gave birth to 3 sons, it isn't as bad as you may be imagining. raising a child with or without some one is the hardest thing. do you have people that are willing to help you? is your family supportive? you don't say how old you are but if you are too young, then maybe giving up the child for adoption would be best for you if you have no one to lean on. by all means turn to your family and friends when you need to but don't depend on them so much that they are not willing to hang in there with you. a child can be the best thing in the world. they can bring more joy to your life than you will imagine.
i hope that this helps and i pray that things turn out well for you.

Answer 8

You will be alright. Raising a baby is hard I will not lie too you, But you will be able to do it because you know you have to. Having a new baby is a great thing he will love unconditonally right know so take advantage of that. To make things easier on you buy a bassinet for yuor bedroom, so you dont have far to go, premake all the bottles you will need for the night and keep all the supplies you will need for changes and things like that close to you. It will be scary but worth every moment and every smile you and only you will recieve from your baby.

Answer 9

You will be fine, just have faith in your self. I know raising a boy probably scares you more than if it were a girl, but you will be fine. I've been through the child birth thing a few times so if you ever want to talk to some one I'm at purpledragonflyjrh@yahoo. Just have faith in yourself, and you'll be fine.

Answer 10

You won't be the first to do it. This idea has always brought me comfort, because there is no perfect recipe to raise a child. No one YET has done a perfect job. Just try your best, and chalk up your short comings to learning.

Look in your yellow pages for WIC (women, infants and children) organization. They will help you start on medicaid to get the necessary prenatal care you and your baby need. They will also help you get public assistance and even refer you to a job training organization which basically helps you off of government assistance. Their counselors give you advice and practical advice for raising your child.

It's gonna be okay...you're gonna be okay, you're baby is going to be wonderful!