WHY WON'T he DIVORE ME? What is it?

Question

I can't afford a divorce. I make too much to qualify for legal assistance but I can't afford a lawyer or rent and pay for the tuition of my daughter with Down's. He moved out and is seeing someone else but he won't divorce me. I believe that I can show that he committed adultery and that he abandoned the family once he files.
Has anyone been in a similar situation. MEN: Why won't he file. We only talk when it is about the children.

Answer 1

I am sorry to say, he will not file because he know it is going to cost him money. Find a lawyer who will take your case for no money up front. Your lawyer will file a petition to have your husband pay your legal fees. If he was the breadwinner, this should not be a problem. Good luck.

Answer 2

Part of it is that there is just nothing forcing him. He's free, with someone else and so why do it today? It is work to go through a divorce and it will cost money. Secondly, you are already thinking of ways to obligate him to financial support. He is thinking that he will avoid these legal obligations if possible and let you worry about it. he probably won't file anytime soon, so if you want the divorce, you'll have to make it happen. While I appreciate your thoughts about adultery and abandonment, neither will change the outcome of a divorce. It's going to be a matter of finances. If you are working, he will be obligated to pay child support and maybe nothing more, while you split the bills and any assets you might have, unless he is making a lot more money than you are and you've been in a long term marriage. If you really want to play dirty and motivate him to divorce you, start paying your bills with joint credit cards. Maybe buy a new car on a credit card. That will wake him up. If he sees his credit quickly going the wrong direction, where you could destroy him, he may suddenly see that it might be better to make this go away. All just things to think about. Maybe just find a great divorce lawyer and talk. If you decide to move forward with it, then put the lawyers retainer on the joint credit card and indicate that he will be paying legal fees. Good luck!

Answer 3

He won't file possibly for two reasons. The first is the most obvious because of the financial hardship especially if you have a child with a disability. Second, if you can prove that your expenses are overwhelming, I think in some instances the court will make him pay for both parties lawyers. Heres the deal, he is seeing someone else and to go through a divorce would mean that his ability to date would severely be limited financially. I am a firm believer that if you want the divorce you will have to file. He may be hedging his bets when it comes to his new relationship vs. his relationship with you. You see if it doesn't work out with her, then he will still have you. So if you want it you will have to find a way. Besides, the courts usually favor the female anyway so talk with a lawyer and find out what your options are.

Good Luck and I hope it works out the way you want it to.

Answer 4

He probably doesn't want to have to pay what the court will order him to after the divorce, even filing will get him nailed with a temp. order, which also will mean he has to pay.
Your sitiuation sounds very difficult. Make him take his share of the responsibility...the truth is you can't afford not to have a lawyer. This is about money and you need someone to fight this one for you, you have enough on your plate. Borrow money ,ask relatives, do whatever it takes. get the lawyer.
Most states no, if not all, are no fault states, meaning, it doesn't matter if he is doing every woman in the state, it doesn't matter, it won't go against him. His support will be based solely on his income. Beleive me I know, have been divorce twice...don't be stupid like I was, get on the ball and get this divorce filed asap, if you can't justify doing it for yourself then do it for kids, good luck to you. Chin up, it gets better.

Answer 5

TRY THIS, you can get a divorce on the grounds that he abandon you, ask a lawyer, what will happen is basically an add will be placed in the local news papers if he does not answer it you free, or maybe you can go to Mexico for a divorce

Answer 6

He won't file because they he would have to possibly pay child support and alimony. I don't think you need a lawyer to file for divorce. I think you need a lawyer if what you're asking for is complicated, but I don't know. You should try to do some research on the net, and see what forms you need to file, and take them down to the courthouse and file them yourself if you can.

Answer 7

I understand you cause I too am going through the same thing. I am not sure what state you are in but see if you can file pro se. Which is both or only one party wishes to divorce. In my state you pay for the documents, filing fee & sheriff serving fee. The marital agreements do have to be filled out but some courthouses offer a pro se clinic that help you fill those out. Check out your county and see if they offer that.

Answer 8

well, is he paying child support? if not, or if only a little , that may be a factor, court ordered child support will accompany the divorce along with distribution of property and also perhaps spousal maintance support,

or maybe he thinks at some point he may want to come back?

Answer 9

It might have to do with he is ashamed of himself and if he talks to you to much it will only remind him of what he lost,He might not want the divorce cause he knows how much it will cost him in child support and you can also seek money for him messen around on you.He's kicking himself now cause he don't know what to do and he knows what he lost.Keep your head hi and your doing good with the kids.Keep up the good job and look out for you and the kids.Don't ware yourself out cause if you do that there will be noone to help with the kids that is what alot of singel parents forget

Answer 10

What state do you live, most of the time only one person has to ask for a divorce. I would just get a loan or get help so that you don't have to suffer anymore.