Why does society insist on focusing so hard on sexual preferece (identity?)?

Question

Therre was a time in society when two men could live in the same house, share chores, be friends and there is even note of some who took care of an orphan who they found living in the basement of their home. They did all of this without being labeled as Gay, or homosexual or any other sex related tag.

in modern society, if two males do anything beyond a handshake, their sexual prferences are questioned. People wiill suggest they are "hiding" homosexual " feelings.
This is deteriorating the male "paternal" feeling and behavior.
Yes, males do have a "Paternal sense". They find it within themselves to take care of and provide for a family, for children. It gives males a sense of family and belonging, to know their needed somewhere, by someone. It has nothing whatsoever to do with sexual preference, it is part of the makeup of being a man.

if someone is gay, that is their life and should not be harrassed for it, but do not label one as gay just for being a man.

Answer 1

Right on! Well said. Thank you for speaking up. This whole sexual identity thing is being fueled by ultra conservative groups to distract us from the environmental crisis and political melt down that we face. It is time to say enough is enough! Every man and every woman has the birthright of their own sexuality. Period. We should all learn to respect one another and allow one another to live as we please as long as our behavior does no harm and is no danger. It is that simple.

Answer 2

Someone asked a question here at Yahoo Answers the other day. Something like, "Gay men keep coming on to me. How do I get the message across to them that I'm straight?". I found it intellectually offensive that more than a few responses suggested that this fellow might very well be gay... and that he just hadn't admitted it to himself yet. The rationale being that if gay men were coming on to him, they may recognise something in him that he wasn't yet aware of.

How many times have I heard,... "I knew from the time I was very young that I was gay! I was always attracted to the same gender!!" And this is said, usually, to support the idea that homosexuality is so engrained that there's simply never any doubt in the mind of the gay person as to what their sexual identity is.


Yet this questioner is being counselled to..., "Take a careful look at yourself. Maybe there's a gay person in there that you just haven't recognised yet!"!!

All this to say that I agree with you. Male-male sexual attraction is the exception, and non-sexual male friendships are overwhelmingly the norm in this culture. Both heterosexual society and gay society need to get reacquainted with that reality.

Answer 3

I thoroughly agree. Society is hung up on sex period.

Take me for instance. I am a 47 year old single female. Never been married. Do you know how many labels are slapped on me? When I go to my Dr. for a physical and I tell her I am not sexually active do you know I get the biggest smerk?

You're not alone in your frustration. Sometimes it seems to me that people are obsessed with the activity going on in everyones pants.

Instead of focusing on their own feelings and preferences they want to know about everyone elses. It's like mass kinkiness.
Or better put, mass sexual hysteria.

I see nothing wrong with any pairing. Man/Man, Man/Woman, Woman/Woman. Nor do I care what they are doing in bed.
I live with my 45 year old sister who, incidently is also not sexually active.

Can you hear the bells and whistles going off? It's deafening. What is wrong with us? Perhaps we're lesbians.

It sounds like a cliche' but pay no attention and pat yourself on the back for being of a higher intellect. Do what makes you happy and be thankful you don't suffer from the hysteria.

Answer 4

Well if it's not in the mind, where else would it be? I find that humans, or at least men (can't really speak for women) have very creative imaginations. Men can turn almost anything into something sexual, by barely thinking. Yeah, cartoon 'porn' is getting rather popular.

Answer 5

You know what it is? It's that people are scared of difference. I'm outcasted in my town because I'm different, not the way we're talking about, but still different. When they see a gay man, they don't understand it, so they make fun of it. And people have been on their toes with gay people since they legalized same sex marriage. But you know, that doesn't matter, you know what matters? Yourself. If you worry about anything or anybody else beside who you have on your list of friends, you're gonna get screwed. Nobody cares about anybody else anymore, as long as they make it in the long run. And this is why I'm outcasted. You know those things that everybody knows but nobody says, I blatenly and arrogantly mput them in your face. Maybe not arrogantly, but I get the point across, obviously.

Answer 6

I think it's sad that with increased awareness of gay men comes the kind of prejudice that rushes to label any man who's "different". My brother's straight; he's dealt with that pressure. I hope that as the prejudice goes away, so does the rush to label men as queer.

Answer 7

I totally agree with you.
In my opinion we shouldn't talk about life in the bedroom, it's just rude and not necessary.
I get so sick of men being labelled homosexual for being polite, being kind, being good, or being well-dressed. It really irks me, I just think "why do you care?" to people that say stuff like that.

Well said on your part and I totally agree.

Answer 8

No one would think a thing about it if it weren't for the gay "in your face" attitude of todays homosexuals. They weren't content to just be gay, they had to be gay and proud of it, and they demand that everyone else embrace their lifestyle, too.

Answer 9

Because people have an innate need to categorize everthing..it makes it easier to understand and comprehend...I agree with you, but the cold hard truth is that "it is what it is" ..c'est la vie...