My boyfriend and i have been together a long time nearly 9 years, he has been talking about marriage, the thought terrifies me i dont know whether i should, i need advice. We argue quite abit. Do you think i should marry him?
2006-11-17 01:46:55 · 8 answers · asked by susie ooozzz 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If there are problems in the relationship face up to them....talk seek councelling if need be. BUT don't think that marriage will somehow be a cure......it will most certainly notbe.
2006-11-17 01:55:04 · answer #1 · answered by eagledreams 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask yourself: Can you see yourself with him forever? Never going out with anyone else? Is it commmitment to him that 'terrifies' you? Is he a good partner; would he be a good parent? It sounds from your question as though you think maybe he is not the person you should marry.
I also wonder what you two are still arguing about after all this time. Surely you know each others' position on world affairs etc. If it's money, drinking, these things won't go away if you get married. They need to be sorted out now. My advice is to either sort them and get married; or finish it.
Is it the wedding itself that is worrying you? You can have as many or as few people as you like, a big party or a select dinner. A church or a town hall. My husband wouldn't marry me; eventually he confessed he was worried about standing up in front of his parents & saying 'I love her', but he managed it. The wedding gave us a big boost, a new start (and I got pregnant on my honeymoon ...).
A difficult choice, darling. Good luck.xxx
2006-11-17 02:09:24 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wedding nerves is always natural but if there is any doubt in your mind or you think marriage and react "UG NO" then this is more than nerves you are not ready that is not to say you dont love him just not ready you are probably arguing because he is pushing you just ask him to be gentle many long term relationships break up once they are become married because they are just not ready for the comittment
2006-11-17 08:31:15 · answer #3 · answered by honey 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you told your boyfriend that it worries you. If not before you even think about saying yes or giving him an answer you need to talk to him and tell him about it.
Do you love him and do you want to be with him for the rest of your life, if the answer is no or you don't know then don't do it. Don't let anybody push you into something that you aren't ready for or you are unhappy bout. Marriage is a big step and you have to be absolutely sure.
If you have a close family member of friend talk to them about i, but you also need to talk to you boyfriend
2006-11-17 08:07:21 · answer #4 · answered by Baps . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If in doubt, leave out. But if you have been together that long and you are unsure about marriage, maybe its time to part or look deeply into whats wrong with your relationship. Arguing is normal in any relationship, but that depends on what you argue about and the frequency.
2006-11-17 07:05:57 · answer #5 · answered by ribena 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, if you have any second thoughts don't do it. After 9 years if you are not 100% feeling this is a good idea, that in itsself is a very good reason not to go ahead with this commitment to marriage.
2006-11-17 01:55:40 · answer #6 · answered by funschooling m 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you'v been with him for nine yrs and you need to ask us , then the answers no , but you know that really !
2006-11-17 06:25:30 · answer #7 · answered by nicemanvery 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no go to councling, or marriage guidence { you don't have to be married }
2006-11-17 02:04:28 · answer #8 · answered by Weed 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋