I was with my first love for a few years and im now with someone else thats amazing. But i still think about my 1st love and i feel that nothing can compare to that sometimes, even though the man im with treats me loads better.
2006-11-17 01:24:34 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Hey I am glad that u feel this way about your First Love!!.
No really I am !!
Its very good that you still remember your first love...you actually should be proud of your self! Which again makes u worthy to be loved by another amazing man. But your'e in a dilema that if its ok to feel first love is incomparable? May be bcos ur feeling a little bit guilty as the man u r with now, is treating u exclusively well .
And also this is 'THE 'question of your life! and you expect somebody to answer in a paragraph.....? well let me give a try.
You see if we put this question to different sorts of people the answers would be in their terms ,not your's.For example a scientist may explain its just a chemical and hormonal reactions, a poet may say it's an inspirations for his lyrics and so on.
But what The first love means to you and How much it means to you
- You decide it.
If you start to compare its gonna lose its value.
If I ask you to close your eyes and imagine the picture of " A MOTHER " -without fail u r goin to imagine ur own mom( Not victoria Beckham with her 2 toddlers!)
Now why is that? Is that bcos ur mom is the hottest mom in the universe ...? No, its bcos she means the word 'mother' to u.
She is the live example of the meaning of that word.She gave u this life and u become the new meaning for her life. Now u cannot accept anyone else in this life to replace your mom, no matter how much love they offer and neither she could accept anyone to be a replacement for you. Well if this is the case than how it could be different with Love. As a child u were a posession of ur mother. Now as an adult u want to possess and offer your love to some one else..
And than u meet that some one and they become special to u.
Now, 'he' bring the meaning of the word 'Love' to u. So when u hear the word love, now u relate it to that 'Meat head' aka the darling ..lol..
Like the same way u relate the word 'mother' in ur head.
And so the first love becomes the 'First love' and get nailed and carved in our heart, and u just cant get it out.
It's what made you who you are now. It s became a part of you now. U cant seperate it from your body and mind. Only, you can decide whether you want some one that YOU loved ? or some one that LOVES YOU ? (provided there is still options).
But to my understanding if its so clear for you , than u wouldn't be here for an answer right. I think u felt morally compelled and u want to know what every body thinks...
Listen forget all of us, alright!
U know what is right. I know u'll be confused like mad, but be confused ,only than u know where u stand and u start to see clearly.Well some people telling you to forget it all and move on ...which I believe is a mistake!
It s like loosing ur core value..its like forgetting a part of u.
I am not telling u to get obsessed and dwell on his thoughts forever. I am telling u to deal with it. Get used to it. Like the way u get used to be with ur flat nose & big lips..etc ..lol....
But we have to grow from that.
u try not to forget him>>bcos the more u avoid his thoughts the more u gonna think about him and it goes on and on.
Its nothing like he is the most perfect man for u..but the love which u had for him makes u to feel that way just the same way like ur mom.
when u start to accept the fact that love is a VERB.. and the feeling of being in love is a fruit of that verb ..
than u have matured in love. And you would be able to open up to some special person again and accept and reciprocate love.
But this time it will not be completely emotional based but u start to incorporate wisdom now
ITS NO MORE FALLIN LOVE BUT STAND IN LOVE!.
So when u reach this stage of life u know how to love and how to be in love. And than after a couple of years from now , u turn back and can recap about it all with an exclusive pride and smile in ur face while resting on your Husband's shoulder.
And I bet, at that time u would not think about ur first love but ME ...lol...!
With Love.
2006-11-18 15:35:04 · answer #1 · answered by lover 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Everyone has a first love. Some of us take a very long time to get over our first loves. However, when you get older and find out the true meaning of love and relationships, then you will realize that the first love was simply just that. You need to start somewhere. I like to think of it as a learning process. You never forget your first love, but people do lose their feelings for them after a while. Don't worry, we all need that experience in order to maintain normal relationships. The more life experience that we have, the better we can love someone and find that person who is perfect for you. Good luck and GOD bless.
2006-11-17 01:42:50 · answer #2 · answered by cookie 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I was with my first love for 3 years then we split up and then I was married for 25 years but often thought about my first love, then I met him 3 and half years ago and we have been together for 2 and half years. I still have the wonderful feelings for him but as time goes on I realise what went worng all those years ago! Enjoy what you have now and dont look back
2006-11-17 03:30:13 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I really have come to believe that our mind can play tricks on us .......i think that people feel this way about there first loves because everyone makes a big wow out of there first love you think in your mind this is the person I'm going to be with them forever you build your mind into thinking that this one person is better any other .......well when i first left my first i was so hurt and thought that i was never going to feel love again .........its been 6 years that we broke up and with in those 6 years i met my man that I'm with now he treats me so much better when i first got with him i would think the same way ........but last year i got to see my first after 6 years and when i saw him my body just felt like a kid again as he got closer to say hi and started talking i notice i was scanning the room to see if my new man was OK and it came to my attention that i really really have love with my new man .........its not superficial its not that fairytale love but its the real stuff ...........now i can sit here and think back to one i was with my first and just laugh but i would never trade what i have now for him ..........
2006-11-17 01:54:10 · answer #4 · answered by mari 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sigh! You should actually forget your 1st love and accept your current guy who loves alot and treats you so much better. To me, 1st love may be sweet or it can be bitter but once it's over, just get over with it and look forward to a better future. Most importantly is you're so fortunate to have found such a great man, not alot of people are blessed with it. Thus, you should really let your past gone and treasure your current one. Don't keep thinking about your ex-lover anymore. You don't want to ruin your current relationship right!
2006-11-17 01:37:48 · answer #5 · answered by PoshBerries 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
my first love i was with for 5 years started going out with him at the age of 14 so my childhood was taken by him lol but he treated me like crap and even now i still compare blokes to him i dont think anyone forgets there first love you will never experience it again thats why it so special just a shame you cant chose who it is from all of them lol
btw hello christopher stephens my first love if you read this lol
2006-11-17 01:31:47 · answer #6 · answered by titchy_lady 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well I know were your coming from cos I was the say why, but now i'm married to my 1st love and sometimes I regret it ... but yea i would go with guys or talk to guys and his name would come up everytime I think that pushed alot of them away I don't know well I hope this help
2006-11-17 01:46:28 · answer #7 · answered by Latashia S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My first was great. Second was even better. Then I fell in love with a girl in a hotel lobby. Chessy but it's the truth. Unfortunatly we live in different countries!
2006-11-17 01:44:40 · answer #8 · answered by KC 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
with your 1st love you tend to share a lot of 1st with, like sex, moving in together etc.. so your bound to compare and look back.
You just have to learn from the last relationship and try not to make the same mistakes.
Like you said this guy treats you better than the last, so enjoy his company.
2006-11-17 01:31:29 · answer #9 · answered by Heather 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I love them all differently but the first was special the second deeper and my husband now the one I love the most .
2006-11-17 01:51:30 · answer #10 · answered by Geedebb 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋