any idea how to tame a 15 year old student?

Question

My friend is a teacher and having big problems with this one student she has called home sent her to the office and everything very stressed out about it and running out of options ...any advice?

Answer 1

Okay, look. Call the parents...the answer of answers...right? No. Of coure that is has to happen becuase this is the policy of evey school I have ever heard of. Call the couselour, kick the kid out, schedule change, blah, blah, blah, blah.

First: people are right....it cannot be taken seriously. It is a 15 year-old kid...how can a fifteen year-old damage a healthy adult's self-esteem? This cannot happen or you friend is going to have ashort career.

Second: there is a chance the student and teacher simply are so close or so far apart in their personalities there is really no hope for reconciliation...if this is the case, then it it the Admin's responsibility to change the individual's class...even though the classroom teacher should be a professional and be able to deal with te student regardless.

Finally, it sounds like your friend and this student need to come to some sort of understanding. Whether it is through mediation with a couselor or just a conversation between parent (or not) your friend and the student and try and find out the real issue.

Kids act crazy because one of their needs are not being met...they act out because they need something...they are missing something and they are desparately trying to get that need filled...the teacher needs to try to understand the student and try to help the student appropriately fill this need. Do not misinterperet this as bending to the student, but understanding goes a long way.

If the student begins to understand the teacher cares for them even though the teacher does not let them get away with anything...always be firm and fair (being fair is often the hard part). Students will blow up once in a while, but if they know you will not bend, but they also know you do care for them...this makes all the difference...it is also the hard way...

It is easy to throw away troubled kids...don't worry about it...they are used to it becuase that is what everyone does to them...your friend needs to consider if she will be everyone else or take the high road...even if it doesn't work...the effort was made and the honor of the teaching profession (as damaged as it is) is honored by the effort.

Answer 2

First call in the parents. They might not even know about the problem. Many schools don't tell the parents until after the problem is huge and the patterns of behavior are set! I don't mean call the parents and complain about the kid's behavior. I mean get them to come into the school. Remember though that the parents have no control over the kid when they are not in the same room. So don't expect that to help unless the parents are really on the ball.

Second, use the homework rule. Retreve the kid from the bus, and take the kid directly to a classroom. No talking or silliness before classes begin. Greet and then say "is all your homework done?" The kid will say yes. Then say "show me." Be sure you have spoken with all the teachers so you know what homework has been assigned. When the kid can't show you all the homework you say "do it now." The kid cannot go to class until all the homework is completed. Do not accept anything wrong or illegeble. Then the kid will have to go and get the assignments from the teachers that were missed. Do this every single day. The reward for doing homework at home is that the kid doesn't have to sit and do it at the beginning of school every morning.

Now here is the next part. Many kids are really bored in school. I'm not suggesting that this is a good excuse for poor behavior. I'm saying that just the same way as some people like to ski and some do not, some like the 'accademic' enviroment of a school and some do not. This kid may think his or her natural talent and interests are not being put to good use. As adults, we forget that we have a choice about how to use and grow our talents and interests. You probobly went into teaching because you were good at 'accidemics' or you learned easiest by doing "book work". So you might think everybody learns like that. Kids are forced to sit down all day and learn all kinds of things they may not think are important and are not good at. There is no choice in some things. Hence the homework porgram.

But the next time the kid is acting up, stop the class and ask the kid to teach it. Do not use that sarcastic sentence "would you like to teact the class Mr. or Miss So&so?" I mean really invite the kid to run the lesson, now.

Have all the kids take a turn teaching for one day each week. Have the kid choose the format of the next test. Or write it!

Have them all write about what they hate most about school and treat it exactly like other writing assignments with corrections and spelling and all. The kid gets to say all kinds of things that would normally be disregarded as bad aditude. And you will get to see the problems at school from the other side.

Punishing this kid will never work. Find out what he or she is good at, what he or she likes, or how this kid learns and playing to that, will make everyone's life easier. And the kid will love you for it!

Answer 3

You've got only one choice in this situation.
You've got to set up an appointment with the parents, the child, the teacher and the principal. If there is a school counselor, they need to be there too.
You have to lay down the law. You have to tell the family that the child has no more chances. Either she straightens up or doesn't come back. Then it's up to the parents to do their job.
A teacher's job is to teach, not to counsel. Sometimes it requires a little of both.
In this situation, it's time to get a trained psychologist involved to find out what is going on with this child. If you don't resolve whatever emotional issues this child has, she won't be able to focus on learning or control her behavior. There could be problems at home, abuse, or the child might need to be on medication.
Bottom line is...don't put up with it. Do something about it. Teachers don't make enough money to put up with that kind of disrespect and abuse.
Try to get her some help and then go on with your life. At least you know you tried, that you did your part. Don't let it ruin things for everyone else in the class either. That's not fair to them or their education.

Answer 4

Did she try having a heart to heart talk with the girl? Usually girls of her age just need attention and a listening ear. They need to feel they belong. Make use of the "carrot method". Make her a leader of the class. A group leader perhaps in a certain activity, or assign her to be in charge of the discipline in the room. i,e, listing down the names of boisterous classmates, etc. and then reward her for work well done and good behavior. Making a student feel important usually encourages her to live up to that expectation. At first , the student will be wary for sure. So the teacher has to assure the girl that having responsibility will be good for her. A sincere talk would do the trick. Good Luck.

Answer 5

Discipline procedures vary by state, but in New York, you can have a student removed from your classroom for being repeatedly disruptive to the learning process. Most schools have procedures to follow, and the consequences keep getting more severe for each infraction. These can range from detention to in-school suspension to expulsion. I would advise your friend to find out exactly what the discipline procedures are at her school and follow them to the letter. Also, it's very important to leave a paper trail - file incident reports with the office, or if that option isn't available at least keep a log of what the student is doing to be disruptive. That way she will have something in writing to back her up. If the administration is uncooperative (which unfortunately is the case in many schools), then she should ask her union for help.

Whatever happens, be sure she remembers not to take it personally. It can be very stressful but remember it's not her fault.

Answer 6

Has anyone thought that a 15 y.o. is not a kid anymore. The girl is going through the most confusing time in her life, she's dealing with puberty, peer pressure, falling in love for the first time. Has anyone thought that pressing her by calling parents, counselors, other teachers just makes her more rebellious. Why don't we suggest just trying to befriend the girl. Ask her to stay after class for a chat. Don't expect the dialog, be prepared to give her a monologue. Tell her first what are the qualities in her that you like, tell her how much you believe in her and want to see her succeed in life, than tell her how much she hurts your confidence and feelings by disrespecting you in your class, ask her if there was something that you did, that would've caused her to treat you that way. Remember to make this about her, not about you and your class. Let her know that you want to establish a trusting respectful relationship with her, where you'd treat each other as friend, not enemies.

Answer 7

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Answer 8

I'd suggest the teacher have a meeting with the principal, school counselor, and parents all at the same time and go from there.

Answer 9

can't she refuse to teach this girl? That happened when certain people played up when I went to school, does the school not have an isolation unit or detentions they could put this girl in?