I have Secondary Custody of our 2 girls. He as Primary 15 days after our divorce handed the girls over to me to live. Signing a hand written agreement stating I had Primary Custody til further agreed upon. He & his prego girlfriend broke up and she called our girls BRATS & took all of their things from her car and threw them on the ground like it was trash. Much more but you get the idea. I supported my children for the entire time they lived with me. Well he & prego get back together & get married. Next thing ya know they want my kids back. I stood up to him and refused causing him to call the Law Enforcement on me. I was told by the police if not turning the children over to him I was in contempt and could be arrested. So I turned them over and now I'm in a deep depression over the whole thing. I recently had to under-go surgery & lost my job in that process. I still have my part-time job & looking for full-time work. In saying that I can't afford an attorney. ANY ADVICE?
2006-11-16 21:18:05 · 12 answers · asked by middleagedcowgirl 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The Police didn't want to hear my side of the story or all the proof I had showing their residency for 6 months. He said in the beginning that the girls needed their mother. Now he says I told you I would be taking them back.....He also says he is doing this in the best interest of the kids.....I believe it is so he can get on Medicaid & not have to pay for FORMULA:( Sad but I wouldn't put it past him.....And I believe his new wife is unstable......Advice is appreciated!
2006-11-16 21:22:24 · update #1
My age is 31....My girls are 6 & 3
2006-11-16 21:46:13 · update #2
Does your state have an organization that offers legal services to low-income folks? Most states do. You need to go to back to court, unfortunately, and try to get either joint shared custody or primary custody of your girls. You can't do this alone, and that's what those types of organizations are there to help with. Good luck.
A follow up: Just so you know, I work in law enforcement, and the police can only enforce what the courts decide. There is nothing the police can do for you until the court order is changed. This is unfortunate, but true!
2006-11-16 21:24:35 · answer #1 · answered by Rebecca 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Per your question, you have but one fault, you should have had his written agreement at least notarized or went back to court for full custody. You can proceed with legal aide or do it yourself in juvenile court as the judge will let you plead your case. The court may order social services to investigate both of you prior to any decisions and interview your children too. You did not say your age nor that of your children which can make a difference.
2006-11-16 21:43:30 · answer #2 · answered by AJ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is more going on here than you are saying. How did a man get primary custody of two little girls instead of the mother?
I am a man and I know that when children are that young, especially little girls the guy only gets custody when there is a problem with the mother or a percieved problem with the mother that has been proved in court.
2006-11-16 23:17:29 · answer #3 · answered by d b 3 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Get a legal aide attorney if you can't afford one, because you obviously need a reconsideration on the initial custody agreement. If you want your children, and you can't trust any other arrangement he makes then it needs to be decreed by the court. Check into it.
2006-11-16 21:29:36 · answer #4 · answered by Chris 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
obey the law
honor your agreement with him and let him have primary back
get on your feet and then request the court for a change
prove you are best parent.
be nice to stepmom.
enjoy your visits as secondary as much as possible
if the kids are being abused, complain to court.
Get a book on how to do this yourself ( they cost about $20 or are available in libraries) read up and educate yourself and stop being a victim of your own helplessness and ignorance.
do not trash the ex to the kiddies.
2006-11-16 21:26:23 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Legal Aide...go file for custody and fight him hard...get the kids back and keep em.
2006-11-16 21:23:41 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorrythis is happening
Look in the phone book for a womans support group.
Document everything he does
2006-11-16 22:04:20 · answer #7 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Be strong to protect your kids, also be happy in any circumstance to have more energy to rebuild your family
2006-11-16 21:43:57 · answer #8 · answered by Neighbour 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't get depressed put all your strength in fighting for your kids.
call the legal aid in your county the will help you
2006-11-16 21:28:40 · answer #9 · answered by nicname 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to hear, some people can be straight up jerks! best of luck
2006-11-16 22:08:14 · answer #10 · answered by Elusive ()Ne 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋