please help, i cheated on my gf more than once, and she found out,i am never gonn do it again how do i shw her

Question

she found out i did before and now found out that i did again, but it was a long time ago, i feel so selfish, and i wanna show her she can trust me, bc i see things alot diff now, she is gone, and our hopes of being married in serious jepordy, i was selfish and i want her to be the only women i ever am w again, women out there especially what can i do, i really hurt her, she was my everything and i messed up. but i have made up my mind to do nething to get her back, so now i just gotta do it, she has heard stories from people that i cheated on her all the time, and some girls have even said i have had sex with them or tried to talk to them, and they are completely lying, so that is making things harder bc she doesnt know what to believe, i love her more than nething, and i have been depressed for the last month and a half, what should u do when u literally cant live wout somebody? please tell me someobody can relate to this

Answer 1

My dear Gem,
Remember once a crack develops and there is loss of faith then it can/may be pardoned but the memory will never go away.

Unless your girlfriend is really a Very Very large hearted girl she will not excuse you for repeatedly cheating her, and even if she does, remember the needle of suspicion will always remain and even if you change you will be suspected for cheating always. You should also not be so sure after this if she is willing to marry you (I would definetly Not).

Would you marry a girl who has been cheating you ???
Marrying a cheat would be like buying a fake diomand and paying for a real one knowingly.

Advice:
-Let this girl go even if you love her a lot (which you dont, had you - you would not have cheated in the first place).
-Change your habits, becaues NO women will like a B/F or husband who is a cheat.
-Find another good girl but remember DO NOT START CHEATING AGAIN.

Answer 2

Well we all make mistakes this one twice by you but the iimportant thing here is you came to realize yourself as you said your different now. You said you will do anything for her and this will take a lot of work to gain back trust this doesnt' happen over night. but if you really want her you'll do it.

First you have to come clean with her about the whole situation and she will have questions and don't lie there again or she will say forget this your still the same way. then tell her you want to repair this marriage what ever it takes i mean business and tell her how much she means to you. and you will have to show her . she will want proof not cheap talk that she is use to from you. You have to show her you really mean what you say. and if she wants to know your email stuff where you been all day when you come home call you when ever don't get pissed off she's checking for her own self to be reassured and you better be where she needs you to be or else she will start thinking your up to know good again. and in time she will see that no matter what she checks who she asks where you go she knows you mean what you say. But again action speaks louder than words you have to gain back her trust and the only way is for her to see that your serious not idle chit chat.

Hound and stay on her too she will be so pissed at you at first she won't believe a thing you say. but don't give up. she will come to know in time you mean it if your hanging around and staying on top of her all the time. she will know you really want her back. Oh doesnt' hurt to send her flowers at work home where ever . and really be good to her.

good luck

Answer 3

Well I can tell you first hand how it feels when someone you love so much cheats on you cause I have been cheated my self and I will tell you it hurts like heck!!!!!!!!!! Shame on you for doing that to her. There is no excuse what so ever for doing that.

If my boyfriend was to try to get me to come back to him now after he cheated on me, this is what he would have to do to win me back. I know this is asking for a lot but you have to keep in mind that you are the one that messed up, not her.

Don't keep no secrets from her at all. Tell her everything. If you go some where take her with you. Never talk on the phone to another woman. You get a call, let her know who you are talk to. Don't talk to other girls at all. Don't hide anything from her. Love her like there is no tomorrow.Be very affectionate with her. Tell her you love her all the time and MEAN IT. Don't be looking at other women. Treat her like she is the only woman on this earth. Buy her gifts, take her out to eat. Help her with anything that she does. RESPECT her.

There is other things that you could do, the list goes on and on. You just have to remember that you are the one that cheated on her and it is very hard to get the trust back that she once had for you. So you are going to have to earn that trust back IF you can.

Answer 4

I can relate to her... I have been cheated on....The good news is she may take you back eventually, but the bad news is she will NEVER EVER trust you again....Seriously NEVER.... She will always be checking up on you and suspicious. And the foundation for ANY relationship is trust. That's the bottom line. you betrayed her and the trust is gone. you have nothing to build on. Sorry this is not what you want to hear I know, but the truth sometimes sux....You blew it, and you will NEVER be seen the same way in her eyes...Move on, and look at this situation as a hard lesson learned.

Answer 5

I really can not understand what would make you do that if you really love her? Do you know? Ask yourself.

Forgiveness is the only way. If she can forgive you then there will be a chance. We are meant to forgive one another - because none of us are perfect. Cheating is a really difficult one to forgive though.

You will need to rebuild that trust. The only way i would forgive in this situation is if my guy said he was willing to go to counselling together to sort it out. This really shows that you are making every effort and that you really mean it.

Pray that you have the strength to never cheat again and that your relationship can be saved.

Best wishes

Answer 6

Bad habits are hard to break. Are you really sure you won't be tempted again in the future? Maybe you should get therapy and prove it to your girlfriend.
Going to therapy for your ex, will prove that you really care and are trying to change yourself for the better and it will also increase your chances of winning her back.

Answer 7

if she breaks up with you, you have to respect her decision.

if i were her, i'd probably break up with you and find a faithful man.

i know that doesn't help, but really, this is pretty much out of your control now. you can promise her all you want but trust takes a very long time to build back.

Answer 8

Okay, I'm just going to answer this as a woman who was cheated on then got back together with that man and just married him 6 weeks ago...

My now husband cheated on me with three different girls in the same time frame. From April to September of last year he slept with two girls (each one time), and one girl was an on-going thing. August, he broke it off with the on going one and told me he wanted nothing more than to be with me. A month later(beginning of September) I caught him with her. I was completely ready to end it but he seemed very upset about the whole thing, which threw me off because the whole time he'd been a jerk and I just kept trying to get him to come back to me.

The moment I was ready to walk away, he changed his mind (a lot of guys do that... I think it's a built in thing with them to not realize what they have until it's slipping through their fingers). I told him that I couldn't deal with it and that if he was serious, to figure things out on his own WITHOUT touching either one of us. And then I walked away. A month later he came running back, a completely different man.

It wasn't what he said, because I didn't want to talk about it for a while, it was how he acted. He was completely different... better than when we first got to gether (which was 2.5 years prior). When I finally did bring it up (when I was ready to), he didn't get defensive, just let me talk and cry and he apologized... It wasn't a big apology, no flowers and balloons and cards and candies... just a simple, heart felt "I'm sorry."

So I guess what I'm saying is show her. Don't push her. And if she takes it back, don't bring it up. Not because you don't want to talk about it, but because you're allowing her the space to process. When she does bring it up DO NOT get defensive. Answer anything she asks. Providing she chooses to allow you back into her life, accept that it will take time for you to earn her trust back. She may want to know where you are a lot of the time. It may feel like she's keeping tabs on you, but that's your own fault and if you truly want her back, you will have no problem doing whatever it takes to earn her trust back. And most importantly, DON'T EVER CHEAT AGAIN.

He came back to me October 1st, 2005. We first talked about everything in the middle of November. November 22nd he asked me to marry him. October 1st, 2006 we were married. It wasn't easy, I won't lie, it was one of the hardest decisions I've ever made. But also one of the best... He didn't push me, he let me talk about it when I was ready to. He also answered any questions I had, because as much as we don't want to know, we have this compelling need to know everything. And look at us now... we're married, happier than we've ever been and trying for a baby.

This may sound VERY weird, but I wouldn't change anything that happened last year. It would mean that my husband and I wouldn't have the kind of relationship we do today... we wouldn't have grown so much if things hadn't happened. While it sucks to have such horrible things happen, if you come through it, like we did, better than ever, it makes it all worth while.

Answer 9

sorry to say but i don think shes ever gona trust u again.But u can give it a try.try talkin to her and convincing her.

Answer 10

get a new gf