2006-11-16 18:13:59 · 40 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Wow... well.. let me answer this with some info. about my marriage.
I was my husband's first... everything.
He wasn't mine.
He couldn't understand, if I didn't love those other guys, and most of them left me emotionally hurt, WHY I would want to keep their pictures.
I tried explaining so many times... they're just part of me, of my experience... several are friends, etc.
The explanations seemed only to make things worse.
I tore the pictures up and threw them away.
Even the pictures my mom had in the albums.
A few years later, when going through old stuff in my Mom's basement, we found a few more pictures of me with ex-boyfriends. He said if I wanted to keep any, it would be ok with him. He appologised for being insecure those years ago.
I kept just a few. I never look at them. I have no need to.
They're in a box. He knows where... neither of us think of it.
When the whole thing about pictures started, it upset me, hurt a bit, that he wanted me to let them go... but more so that I knew I HAD to let them go.. that he was in the right.
Now, I'm fine with it and have a wonderful and happy marriage.
For us... me getting rid of those pictures was saying a final "I do", and some final "I don't"s.
Just think about that... and about your pictures and feelings, and do what you feel is right for you.
Blessings,
Apple
2006-11-16 18:25:01 · answer #1 · answered by Apple A 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I still have my pictures that I took with my boyfriend of 5 years. Once I got engaged (yes, I had two boyfriends. I was trying to see who was going to ask me to marry them first.) I put the pictures away in a drawer.
I have been married a little over 3 years now and I still have those pictures. They are stored away in a box and in my closet.
Those pictures look nice, especially of me and I don't want to toss them out. Those were good memories. I just make sure to keep them in a safe place and never have them posted up on walls, mantels or dressers or any thing and it has seemed to work all of this time for me.
It also depends on if your spouse is a snooper and always looking in your personal belongings. My husband isn't nosy, so that helps a great deal too.
Not if it were him with a bunch of pictures???? Those would have come up missing a long, long time ago!
HA!
2006-11-16 18:29:38 · answer #2 · answered by Staci C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think so.. my husband has some pics of his ex girlfriend and me of my ex boyfriends. But they are up in boxes or in photo albums somewhere. If it was a long term relationship it's kind of hard not too I mean I would even have to get rid of my graduation pictures .. As long as there not like on display or anything
2006-11-16 18:18:35 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, as long as there are no feelings or emotions about that person still around.
I have pictures of my exes, and my husband has pics of his exes too. I have no problem with that.
I think a photo represents a part of my past, and shows what's made me who I am today-- whether it's an ex, or old friends, or anything else in a photo-- so it's not something I would destroy or throw away. (But they should be kept in a box or album or some sort-- not displayed on the mantlepiece or framed on the wall or anything!)
2006-11-16 18:21:08 · answer #4 · answered by catwomanmeeeeow 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I have some somewhere, in a box with a ton of old stuff from high school. my husband doesn't mind because he knows i'm not looking at it all the time and he understands it's all past stuff. the only reason i keep it is because i don't have many pictures of myself from that time period without the ex.
he got rid of all his ex's pictures when we first started dating since the only ones he had were of the ex's and not with himself.
2006-11-16 18:29:13 · answer #5 · answered by maygan.lee 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The past should evaporate when two people get married..They should be the center of each others universe..There should never be any outside interference..Are you paying attention to this??Let the past go and move forward..Throw the pictures away it doesn't matter how innocent they appear they will only hurt or at least make the other feel insecure..No one wants to feel insecure in a marriage
2006-11-16 18:22:18 · answer #6 · answered by john316tdh 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No it is not ok unless you want your spouse or partner to find out. Plus keeping pictures of your ex's will trigger back old unnecessary emotions and it will end up causing problems in your current relationship.
2006-11-16 19:12:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
i know how plenty that hurts and that i'm very sorry you're able to pass with the aid of that. What often helps me is to abolish each little thing that keeps me in touch with my exes. i attempt to evade them as much as obtainable or maybe lose touch with mutual acquaintances for a jiffy until issues start to heal. i'm hoping that suggestion can help you out. remember, time is the grasp healer. I wish there grew to become into something extra i ought to assert. i'm hoping issues pass your way quickly. better of success, buddy.
2016-10-22 05:56:10 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would think that would depend on the person. I am a jealous type with issues like that & would raise immortal hell if I found he was keeping such things. But, I have nothing to worry about as he can't stand his ex's. I also wouldn't keep that sort of thing either, as I have nothing for them even though I didn't depart on bad terms with them, I still see no need for pics of them.
2006-11-16 18:22:12 · answer #9 · answered by OZzY MoTo 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think it's ok if there are reasons behind it, for example my fiancee keep a picture of him and his ex with him in his wallet but my fiancee's kids are in the picture too. If they are family picture or if the person doesn't have any feeling for the ex in the picture then i think it's ok. It's memories.
2006-11-16 18:19:07 · answer #10 · answered by Dawnielle 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋