2006-11-16 17:10:50 · 17 answers · asked by benjk4 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You don't have to say anything to him, just be there for him.
2006-11-16 18:15:14 · answer #1 · answered by ina W 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello IN Shock- If you were a friend of theirs, which you probably were-you have a tough job. Let me tell you about a friend of mine then you can decide on your own. A few years ago just before Christmas, my two life long friends were going visiting. Their kids were in the back seat all no seat belts. They hit ice and went off the road into a ravine, the two girls somehow survived and he bairly survived.(massive head injury) She was killed on impact, OK. All I had to do was be there for him, when he wanted to talk I talked to him. I helped him raise his Daughters. And he's doing fine now, he's lonesome but we do things together. He's Still your friend- right. Don't worry about what to say, you may not have to say anything much I just talked about things we'd done together, memories, happy memories. Remember that's all he will have to hold on to for a long time. So forget the gay thing, hold him if he should stumble. He will gain strength from you. Best to you. And God bless the both of you.
2006-11-17 01:34:31 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't say "I'm sorry," it's annoying. You weren't the cause of her death so what are you apologizing for? Something along the lines of "there is nothing to say in kind of a situation" and "I'm here for you if and when you need me" would be appropriate and appreciated. Don't pretend to know what he's going through because you don't. Someone else suggested that you say "I can only imagine how you feel". I disagree-- you can't possibly imagine what he is going through, regardless of whatever loss you have suffered. All you can do is make sure that he knows that you'll be there for him. My greatest sympathies go out to your friends and his family. Good luck.
2006-11-17 01:40:13 · answer #3 · answered by Eve 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Every person grieves differently. First you give them space. Then you say "I know if I say I'm sorry, it's not enough to comfort you or bring her back. I also can't say I understand because I've never been in this situation before. Just to let you know I'm here for you buddy whenever you need and if you feel like calling me up at 3 in the morning, feel free to do it. Whatever it takes to get you through this, I'm here" and then you try to hug him.
2006-11-17 02:13:17 · answer #4 · answered by choosinghappiness 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Last year i lost my dad then two mouth later my mother was killed in an accident . So i understand how hard it is for people , They just don't know what to say , but that they are sorry for my lose. Tell your friend that you really don't know what to say !but just let him know that if he needs to talk you will be there for him when he is ready . Let him know she will never die as long as he has her in his heart, and they will meet again in time. God bless
2006-11-17 01:54:30 · answer #5 · answered by sponkey200 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They say don't make the comment "I know how you feel", rather "I can only imagine how hard this is". That is really a tough situation. You want your friend to know you are there for him, but yet you don't want to bring up the death. Maybe just say "if you need to talk, I am here". Best of luck, and sorry to hear of your friends loss.
2006-11-17 01:19:57 · answer #6 · answered by Carey L 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Times like these are extremely hard to talk about..There aren't enough compassionate words in the vocabulary to put together in a sentence to help that kind of pain..I have suffered the lose of a loved one and l've yet to hear anything that has helped..All you really need to do is be there and listen..When your friend feels like opening up and talking about it be compassionate and caring..We all need someone to talk to to try to convey our feelings to especially at times like these,Your friend will need to have you around to talk to but it's going to be when he(she) is ready to..Be there to listen that's all you need to do...
2006-11-17 01:29:46 · answer #7 · answered by john316tdh 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is not much you can say...
Just be there for them, support them and understand that they may push you away to be by themselves, give them a little space but dont leave them totally alone, make sure they know you are there for them...dont be scared if he starts talking about her, help him remember all the good times...I'm sure his actions will guide you the most important thing is being around...just incase he needs you.
2006-11-17 01:22:38 · answer #8 · answered by Anastasia 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your friend might not even want to talk about. if that's the case, why bring up the pain? wait till he's ready. and if he is, then let him do the talking, i'm sure he'll want some advice and someone to share his feelings with.
2006-11-17 02:58:20 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
there is nothing right to say at a time like this, just listen and be there for him.
2006-11-17 01:18:03 · answer #10 · answered by half insane 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋