Those who have pets : How do you prepare yourself knowing one day your pet will no longer be with you?

Question

Thats what holds me back from petting a dog!

Answer 1

Well, put it in a larger context - all love includes the probability of loss. Over time, you lose parents, grandparents, friends, mates, etc. There are two choices - retreat from love to protect yourself from pain, or embrace love knowing that it is, ultimately, more powerful than pain.

I've lost a lot of friends/family over the years, some moved me more than others, depending on the relationship. A year ago, we lost our beloved shepherd dog. We've lost other dogs over the years, but this dog was the Once In A Lifetime dog - the dog who improved the life of everyone who knew her.

We took her loss very hard. A year later, we still miss her terribly... but would we rather have lived without her? Our beautiful girl was so wonderful, the vet techs who only met her on the day she died cried buckets when she had to go - they had to cause her pain when giving her the tests that revealed her aggressive cancer, but she just licked their hands and endured it all.

I'm crying as I write this, but how much paler, and emptier, my life would have been had I never known her. She was a shelter dog, on death row - we got her just before she would have been euthanized. She had 9 years with us as a loved member of our family, and we try to live up to her example.

We remember every moment we spent together, even the less than perfect ones (like when she chewed up her bed as a puppy), with great fondness.

Meantime, out in the yard, we have one dog she raised (another shelter pup) to adulthood, and another she met only briefly before she died (a rescue pup). Each just as special to us, both different from her.

She taught us to open our hearts to others and do things we thought we weren't brave enough to do. Now we have a dog who is teaching us all about finding tranquility and peace, and another who reminds us daily to laugh because each day contains any number of possibilities - he wakes up cheerful, with a "what wonderful thing will happen next?" attitude.

The four of us (husband, wife, two dogs) have a lot of fun. One day, one of us will leave the others behind - no telling who will leave and who will stay. Whoever is left behind will have the memories of all of the love we shared, every idiosyncracy, each laugh.

Here's what I know:

> None of us ever knows how long he'll live.
> Love is the only game in town worth playing.
> We wouldn't miss it for the world, because the end of the game doesn't outweigh the game itself.

Answer 2

i am 19 years old and have lost two dogs in my life. i loved both of them very very much. the last one died only a few months ago from cancer :( and only ten years old...many people think that ten years is a long time for a dog but i think it's not...
anyway, there are no words to describe the pain of losing an animal. when i lost my best friend a few months ago, every one said, "she was only a dog..at least she wasn't your mom or (insert family member here)"..i lost a lot of friends during that time!!! so, when u lose a dog or cat or any other pet that u care about u might be exposed to people like this..insensitive people...
however, animals brighten up our lives. it is now a fact that people with pets live longer. they keep us going. they give us unconditional love, and they will love us no matter what, forever. no body lives forever. that shouldn't keep you from buying or petting a dog. there are so many animals out there that need love and attention. if u love animals, then have one as a pet. but before u get one, it's healthy to realize they don't live forever..
when i lost my dog a few months ago, it was a complete shock..nothing would have prepared me for that...but even if i HAD known she was dying, i still would've never been actually prepared for that day. but you know what, it's been six months and i now have another dog :) he is a puppy and he has his whole life ahead of him. i know that day will come for him too, but it didn't stop me from adopting him, so it shouldn't stop u :)

Answer 3

I wish there was an easy way to answer this, but there isn't. My cat was 22 (human years) when he died. I'm only 28, and that was four years ago. So, imagine having this same cat your whole life, knowing eventually he's going to die. And trying to brace for it.

I'm still not really over it. When I go to my parent's house, I think I see him out of the corner of my eye or hear his little bell. :(

I had a really bad moment just recently when my boyfriend and I were talking about his dog that he had when he was a kid. It was the strongest I'd felt about missing my cat in years.

I don't think there's any way to prepare except to know it'll happen, and to love your pet and treat him/her exceptionally well while you have the chance.

Plus, the experiences you have while being a pet owner are fantastic, so don't let the inevitable keep you from enjoying the moment. :)

Answer 4

Love every minute of every day that he is with me. Our JRT is 10 years old, has epilepisy, diabetes and is blind. We know we won't have him forever and will be extremely sad then that time comes, however he brings so much joy, laughter and fun into our lives RIGHT NOW that we would not have it any other way. We have discussed getting another dog after he is gone and both of us are looking forward to the day when ALL of our children have moved out of the house or gone on and we can travel without problems, so we are not going to "replace" Jack. But until he is gone, we will cherish each and every minute with him.

You can't live your life anticipating what might happen, you can only live with what is here and now. Make the most of life as it is and live each moment as if it the last. If it is not the last, then you have done all you can to make it the BEST.

Answer 5

There is no preparation for either animal or human. There is only one thing you can do to prepare. Spend each day with your pet as if it could be his/her last (the same goes for humans). That way when heaven does call for your pet, you can look back and know that you made every day count and gave all the love that you had.

Answer 6

you really don't. for 2 yrs i tried to mentally prepare for losing 2 dogs. they were both old and getting sicker and they had to stay together. i lost them both on May 6, 2005. i came home, told my husband no more. when the 3 we still had were gone that was it. i couldn't take that again. then i climbed in bed for 2 weeks. i could barely eat, and i cried constantly. after a month he asked me "if you don't rescue them, who will"? he had me there. about a month or so later we rescued Rocky. i still have a hard time dealing with the loss of my other 2 friends, but they will always be in my heart, and someday we'll be together at RAINBOW BRIDGE. if it helps, little dogs like cockers can be with you for about 17 yrs, med sized (like the 2 i lost) about 15 yrs, large 8 - 10 yrs, and Danes and Irish Wolfhounds 6 - 8 yrs. in my opinion, because mixes have fewer genetic health problems they seem to live longer. the main thing is to make sure they get vetted properly. check ups every yr as well as their shots. i suggest you get books on dog care before you make a choice and it wouldn't hurt to volunteer in a shelter once in a while either.

Answer 7

I recently lost both my yellow lab (13 years old) and my collie (14 years old). They both died in my arms - because I wanted them to have the comfort of a loved one holding them when they breathed their last. They were too good a friend for me to allow them to go into that long good night alone. Naturally, I was very upset when they died and people have asked me how I could even consider getting another dog when I know how bad it feels to lose one.

The best answer I can give to this question is this - those 2 dogs brought soooooo much joy into my life. I loved them every minute of their years and they loved me. I have wonderful and funny memories of them that will never leave me. So, to me, in the long run the happiness they brought to my life far outweighed the sadness I felt when they died - and I wouldn't trade one minute of that joy just to avoid the inevitible sadness their passing would bring. The quality of my life would have been diminished if I had never known them.

Answer 8

If you deny yourself happiness because of fear of the future, you miss out on a lot.

Everyone you know will die someday - does that keep you from getting close to someone? You'll die someday - does that mean that your family and friends should avoid getting close to you, because they know one day you'll no longer be with them?

Death is a part of life. It hurts, and it's not fun to deal with. But to me, the alternative of "not having a pet at all" isn't an option.

Something for all pet owners to read:

"Choices"
http://www.spoiledratten.com/rainbowbr2.html

Answer 9

Those who feel love will always feel lose. It's a fact of life. Just because you don't want you spouse to die does not mean you wont get married. There is no way anyone can prepare for such a great loss. It is better to have loved and lost then never loved at all.

Answer 10

Do you ask this same question about your significant other, other loved ones, your job, etc.?

Everything and everybody will come to an end. Some sooner, some later. Sometimes it is a terrible tragedy, sometimes it is a blessing and a relief.

If you are making choices today because of something like that, I suggest you need to talk to someone you trust and respect about it and related issues.