my husband and i have been married for 13 years. he has 3 kids they never liked me or my 3 kids from day 1. I have been nothing but good to those kids and they have admitted, to trying everything to make us divorce. Now they are all 3 married with kids themselves and they are still at it. they have always been extremly spoiled and they dont care about anyone but themselves. I cant take the mind games and harrasment anymore I love my husband, but my health isnt so good anymore and the stress worsens my condition. My husband says he knows that they are wrong, but he wont do anything to alienate them.He wont even scold them about thier rude behavior. They even acted horrible with us at their grandmas funeral! I wont ever go around them again,and I wont allow them in my house anymore. I have babysat their kids I have cooked for them, I treat their father like a king. And they still hate me. I dont want to cave in and divorce my husband,but it is causing extreme problems,in our marrige.
2006-11-16 13:27:00 · 6 answers · asked by foxtrot 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Wow I thought I was the only one living through this. From the first time I met my hubs 4 kids from a previous, they astounded me with their lack of tact and class. I mean I can understand a little, but the older they got the worse things got. My children and myself have endured verbal and physical abuse from these kids that you can only imagine. One of my sons had a hole bitten in his face, they have called me a ***** to my face in my own home. They have turned me into CPS, accusing me of beating them up. I never touch them, their mother filed a restraining order against me, I had to go to CPS, Court and Mediation, to clear myself. The sad thing is like yours, my hubby does nothing. He just acts like its ok. So I did the same thing you did. I QUIT! I made him get another apartment to spend time with them. Now he's eating it. His kids don't really want to spend time with him, they always beg to go spend the weeked with their other relatives. They are now taking him t CPS, accusing him of beating them, poisioning them, and telling the courts that he doesn't feed them, all he does is drink when they are there. All of this is lies. He still sees nothing wrong. In fact he tries to blame me. They manipulate him with guilt the whole time they are with him. He is no longer to even discuss them with me. You know I hated it at first, but as time goes by, me and my kids are feeling great. I never realized how destructive, they were to MY family. I no longer care what happens, if he leaves, figures it out what ever. I am happier and if he cannot be a man and stand up to them. Then oh well. I love him, but he has to grow up. If he doesn;t stand up to them, then only he will suffer. Not you, hon, and not me. Be strong, you will feel better for it.
2006-11-16 14:57:27 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
so your husband admitted there wrong yet he has no back bone funny and you wonder why these kids are spoiled im sure he had a lot to do with that when they were growing up and now look at them. they are disrespectful to not only you but yes to your husband when they put down his wife they are also putting him down
Well you must be the lead in the house hold since your husband is sitting on the fence which sounds liek he has most of his life.
this is your house just as much as his. And you don't want those children in your home if they are going to upset you. You have been more than kind to these brats enough already. this is your life. Be firm with your husband which i dont' think will be a problem he seems to lack any strength. . and just tell him point blank your not putting up with there **** anymore.
2006-11-16 20:41:15 · answer #2 · answered by For ever in my Heart 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Setting boundaries is necessary, but by banning your husbands children you have placed him in an impossible situation, where he must choose between you and his children. You'll loose in this scenario, always will. It seems to me that he should have put a stop to their behavior 13 years ago. It has been acceptable for 13 years for his "kids" to treat you in this manner and your husband has never stuck up for you. Don't ask him to "choose" as him to be your man and talk to his "kids" if it's been 13 years its time for his kids to get over it, and time for him to be the man and stand up for your relationship. He loved you enough to marry you and make a life with you, it won't kill him to stand up for your union! Best wishes!
2006-11-16 13:53:03 · answer #3 · answered by shannonscreativechaos 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You and hubby need counseling big time. I don't know how this is affecting your kids, but if it is, it's never acceptable. Don't even consider what you have done for them, just stop doing anything because they don't appriciate you.
If your kids are affected, you have to dump Daddy too.
2006-11-16 13:36:08 · answer #4 · answered by Nort 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you sound like my fathers wife. she use to say stuff like that about his kids. But her kids did no wrong all they did was use our father for his money. She was like you had nothing to do with us but one day you wil have to answer for that. He had his kids before you. You would not stand for him acting that way to your kids. But in your mind it is all right for you to do this to his childern.
2006-11-16 13:42:55 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you know what to do,
but get them out of your life, not their father
he will see the light
2006-11-16 13:35:45 · answer #6 · answered by waiting for baby 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋