Am I Bisexual?

Question

I know that being gay, a lesbian, bisexual and straight is not a choice. To me its a feeling. I guess I grew up with having the whole "God created you to get married to the opposite sex" whole thing and I didn't believe that is true. In fact unfortunately lost my faith in God a long time ago. Anyway I keep having dreams of woman, yet Im engaged to my boyfriend. I keep dreaming of having sexual relations with them and thinking of different woman and how attractive they are. I just don't know if I would be classified as bisexual. Im starting to really think I am. What do you guys think? Any advice?

I also wanted to add that one of my best friends is bisexual and sometimes when we are drunk we would have fun with whipped cream. I have not actually had Sex with a woman, but I did make out with one.

Answer 1

I used to feel that way and i tried it out.....come to find out ...i was not anything but curious. It was fun...but that was it. You may have to find out before you carry out your marriage. Just so that you know for sure.

Good luck...and I am sorry you have lost God. I pray for you.

Answer 2

Ok. . .let's get rid of one myth: you can be bi-sexual without fulfilling any sexual act with another person of the same sex.

The best way to describe being bi-sexual is that you are an individual who finds both men and women sexually attractive. You may, or may not, be the first in the car to say (or think) 'nice rack' about a woman you see on the street.

As with the opposite sex, there are certain individuals that you are not attracted to, you have preferences. (Who doesn't?) Primarily, you have no revulsion in considering sexual acts with someone of the same sex.

Now, that being said. With you being engaged, these dreams could represent a very human reaction of "cold feet". It's a big step to be taking. Give it some time, and see if the dreams go away. In the meantime, your own observations will tell you if you're bi.

Good luck, with everything.

Answer 3

You're probably going to hate my answer. But let me first say that I have no idea of my own orientation, so I can't possibly favor anyone :>

Think about it this way. You're engaged and there's bound to be some sort of fear there, regardless of how wonderful the relationship is. It's normal and it's called cold feet.

But the other thing is, when hetero people have cold feet, their fantasies are usually about living alone or dating other members of the OPPOSITE sex- not dating other members of their OWN sex. So...

..I think there are more than a few things going on here:

You definitely have cold feet, whether you think you do or not. Once again- this is typical, but you need to figure out why you have cold feet.

Is it because of this *particular* man (and not all men)?

Are there issues in your relationship with this man that you feel that a woman could fix (and not a man)?

For instance, do you need someone (male or female) who possesses what you would consider to be "feminine" traits? (Some people might say "tenderness, good communication, etc., but I don't want to stereotype men & women- you get the point).

It's possible that you just need someone who possesses these "feminine" traits and not necessarily a woman? If your fiance had these traits, would you feel differently (more confident) about him?

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IYou should probably talk to your fiance first- but only about "issues" like communication or tenderness or whatever else you associate with women that you feel might be missing from your relationship. It's possible that if he knew there was a void, he would work with you on it and you'd feel better about your decision to marry.

But if you've tried that route, I still wouldn't "write off men" (only little minds generalize), but I would say that if you're still missing something with this man, then he's not the one. Take the time that (sorry!) a break-up would give you to experiment with *both men and women* Find your niche.

Realize that you may possibly be bi-curious, bi, or even a lesbian. But also realize that when it comes to people, you can't say what you're going to find under their skin until you get to know them (in other words, a woman can't "fix" what's missing).

Sounds like you need a bit of "you" time to sort everything out. Don't let anyone push you while you are vulnerable. Hope this helps. Good luck.

Answer 4

It is normal for a lot of people to wonder that very same thing. Only your heart knows the true answer.

Who knows, you might have a bi-sexual experience and enjoy it and on the other hand, you just might regret it. If you do decide to go down that road, take it slow and easy.

As far as your faith, trust in him and he will lead the way. God works in strange and wondrous ways, just give him a chance and don't pressure him. You'll be pleasantly surprised.

Answer 5

My take on it is that
a) about 10 % of people are exclusively homosexual
b) about 10% of people are exclusively heterosexual
c) that exclusively means better than 90% of their fantasies, activities, etc. are directed that way.
d) the other 80% of us are somewhere in between meaning we could be 20/80 or 50/50 or anyother combo.

So, if you are in the real majority, then you are one of the 80%. All you need to do is come to grips with how your interests, fantasies, desires, etc. place you in terms of the weighting toward one or the other or if you are a 50/50 person.

But it really doesn;t matter anyway since you will choose who you want to marry and settle down with them and ignore the statistics.

Answer 6

Well I don't think you're bisexual maybe you just want to sleep with a woman, just because you think women are beautiful doesn't make you bisexual. My opinion if I was you I would find someone like a best friend to share these feelings with. I really think you should make love to a woman to get it over with.

Answer 7

Are you sexually attracted to your boyfriend as well as the women? If so then yeah you are bi. Just remember you are engaged and if you love him you will stay loyal, bisexuality is not an excuse for infidelity. I know you haven't given any reason for me to doubt that you are loyal but it's such a common misconception that I feel it's necessary to explain.

Answer 8

You're not really bi until you act on your urges. If you're just daydreaming about these girls and nothing more then I wouldn't worry about it. If you feel like you need to find a woman to be with then I would say you're bi.

Answer 9

Does Bright sound not so bright to you? He does to me... Duuuhhh! Listen, you won't know unless you try it. No one can answer your question, except you. You might find it wasn't all that exciting, or you might find you're really a lesbian, and not bisexual at all. Only you can answer that!

Answer 10

Um..yea? Sounds like it to me.