All my ten month old does every day is follow me around all day long crying for me to pick her up!! And I CAN"T pick her up ,I have laundry to do ,I have an almost three year old daughter who wants to go "Potty" like every 20 minnutes,Another daughter that I have to go get from school pretty soon,and I have to COOK ,clean the house ,wash the dishes,..and alot more... she gets on my last nerve !!! My husband is No help to me at all and he assumes I have another "MAN" b/c I have no time for sex even. I am SO fed up with my life . And my 10 month old baby is driving me crazy! What do I do ??
Just deal with it I guess???
2006-11-16 04:55:16 · 38 answers · asked by ~*meli$sa*~ 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
me, me, me!!!! I feel for you. Believe me, i feel like that quite often with my 9 month old son. he is not mobile yet so thank god, he is not following me around. If he starts, I will say No..then i will keep picking him up and putting him in a spot where his toys are...eventually he will learn. he is, however a very fussy and demanding baby and cries about every 10 minutes....for nothing!!! I have to ignore him so he learns that i am not going to go and pick him up whenever he feels like it and like you, i have things i need to do around the house. When he stops crying, i will talk to him here and there so he knows he is being a "good boy". my fiancee is no help to me, either..he just seems to make it worse...I tell him when he has the baby in the mornings(as i am dropping my daughter off at school) to not constanly play with him cuz it makes it harder on me when i have him ALL day and the baby expects me to sit with him like his dad does. he tells me, he is not but i can tell he does. here, here...my man also tell me i do not love him anymore cuz i want to be alone at night when the kids are in bed...but in reality, i need that time to unwind, for myself. he does not understand it and we get into fights because of it. With my 9 month old son, when he cries and keeps the cry going and i know there is nothing wrong, i put him in his room on the floor(so he will not fall asleep) and shut the door til he calms down or i am ready to get him...sometimes i will put toys around him... I am the boss, not him. With my 8 yr old daughter, when she whines after school(after i have had a long day with the baby) I tell her to go in her room until she can stop whinning or i give her a good old fashioned swat on the butt(it works every time)I am sure you are going to have a lot of nasty comments from people. ignore them. they need to be in your postion to understand and have somwhat of an experince for it. you are a mother, yes but you should not have to deal with cranky kids all day, put them in check and let them know you are the boss. and i do not think i need to tell you this, do not have anymore kids, I am not. 2 is enough for me. I want my life back sooner than later. and also, get some time for yourself. I leave my fiancee every sunday with the baby and go over my sisters, movies,etc and just chill out. Tell your lazy husband to help out or get lost...with the kids...lol...good luck and take care cause i care
2006-11-16 05:10:02 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 3⤋
Of all the "answers" 3rdtimesacharm has the best working advice for you. I always thought stay at home moms had the best cush gig until I had my first (and only) baby 11 months ago, and things have not been the same since.
She gives me the greatest joy I have ever felt in my life, she is a happy, sweet baby, but she is demanding and clingy, needs attention constantly, does not sleep well unless she is near an adult!! And that is just one baby, so I can only imagine the stress of having 3. But your exhaustion and frustration is understandable.
My baby has her playpen and exersaucer in front of the tv, where I can see her from the kitchen. She only tolerates either one for 10-15 minutes at a time, but you can get a lot done in that time, then back to playtime until snatching the next work break.
Your husband is what he is; you have needed his help since your school-aged child was a baby and he has never gotten the clue, so just forget that. Let the house go, to some extent. It is nowhere near as important as your girls or your ability to enjoy them, or to maintain some relationship with UselessMan. Go to convenience foods for dinner - macaroni casserole or crock pot meals every night. If UselessMan doesn't like it, he can help you solve the problem, either by actually helping or by hiring a part-time mommy's helper. If you can get a friend, relative, or occasional sitter, it will help. Your oldest daughter should be able to start helping you out, even if just for a little while after school??
I guess I would just say I am sorry you are not enjoying motherhood right now, it should be the toughest job you'll ever love. I don't think you need a doctor, you really just need a nap or maybe a nice quiet bubble bath now and then if you can get a little help. GOOD LUCK and remember how much your girls love you! And whatever you do, PLEASE disregard the negative, smart-alec, non-productive remarks. I don't really think you posted your question to start a fight or offend all the rest of the world's tired moms.
2006-11-16 07:03:55 · answer #2 · answered by realtyannie 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Afraid that is part of being a mother i know cause i have three sons a 6 year old that i drive back and forth to school and a 2 1/2 year old who is potty training and a 4 month old baby and yes i do all the cooking and cleaning but i Manage and if you just manage your time ,so can you ,Do the laundry during nap time ,Clean house after kids go to bed ,and involve them in an activity while you cook dinner,Trust me it is not going to get any easier you need to count to ten breath and start your day
2006-11-16 05:13:26 · answer #3 · answered by Tara 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Unfortnuately, I understand. And it happens to A lot of people. Some of these RUDE people probably don't even have kids.
Here is what I do. My son does the "whining" bit, not so much the crying. So, I stop what i am doing. Sit down with him. And get him content. Sometimes he just wants my attention for a few minutes, then he is off again. After i get him calmed down, i try to get him distracted with something else (toy, movie, etc) If that doesn't work, I bought one of those hip hammocks. It's a pain, but it helps me get things done. In the end though, realize, having a dirty house and mounds of dishes and laundry is okay. Taking the time out with your child comes before all that. And if hubby has a problem with that when he gets home, then he needs to HELP. Just remember, they will grow out of this. It helps to keep your sanity sometimes. So, while having anxiety about needing to cook, clean, this, that, and the other, i know it can wait, and i might be a little more exhausted, but in the end, it's my child who needs me more than my piled high dishes. It will get better!! My sister has the SAME problem, and she even takes meds now when she feels she may loose it!! You're not alone!
BTW----some of you should be ashamed!!! Give her kids away???? Geeze, dramatize much???? It's obvious you don't have kids OR any UNDERSTANDING. Don't bother giving her crappy answers, you aren't helping her. You people are rude and stupid. JUst shows what kind of parents YOU will be.
2006-11-16 05:11:21 · answer #4 · answered by 3rdtimesacharm 3 · 4⤊ 1⤋
those darned dishes will be there forever, that baby will not be small forever. tell your husband u need more help. this is the reason why kids have two parents, its so that they don't feel as overwhelmed as u do. u need a break.
spend the weekend to get yourself organized so that u r not so intense all the time. like set some rules so that housework is easier, instead of cleaning all the time, spend 1 hour a day cleaning and if u don't finish cleaning the room your in don't worry about it. do laundry only every thur, get a babysitter to relax. get your husband to help u. get your older kids to help. no one can do it all on their own and come out sane.
2006-11-16 05:12:17 · answer #5 · answered by Miki 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is a personal opinion post and people can "thumb down" me all you want...I absoluty disagree with you on this. My 2 1/2 month old son was circumsized and there was no doubt or discussion in my house about it, we both felt it should be done. I don't think parent's that choose not to have it done are wrong, so why should my choice be wrong in other's eyes?? I know you can teach a child proper cleaning techniques to keep their private areas clean, but in my house we just feel it's more hygenic to have it done. That and the facts speak for themselves. Uncircumsized men are 3 times more likely to develop urinary tract infections. I'm a pediatric nurse and see sick children everyday, so why would I choose to do something that could possible lead to illness in my child? Again, it's a matter of personal opinion and I believe everyone has a right to their own opinion, I don't make judgements of other's opinions, so please don't make judgements on mine!!
2016-03-28 22:35:02 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think you're bad for complaining: but i do think you need to see a doctor....the fact that you are seeming stressed abt your 10 month old like that probably indicates you have an underlying medical reason to.....migiht just be you need stress management, kids can take a toll...
Secondly, i actually feel mor sory for your child...kinds need to be held and loved its their insticnt...doesnt mean you have to hold her all day...give her some times alone..hold cuddle rea...and she'll grow confidetn..its actually proven that holding a child and giving them their times to hold them as an infant makes them LESS clingy later on. Another reason is at this age kids are going through seperation anxiety, they need to see their mama.
I know you have laundry, and househld chores to do....but please try scheduling time to just play with ur kid alone. even if its 20 mins between another kids potty break..or supervise their play time together. and remmeber, your kids need youtoday to be better individuals tomorrow, you will never get this time back, but the laundry and dishes will be there always.
Im sure you're doing your best juggling life as a mother, we all are. I hope you find the balance, and please do not ignore your child. My daughter is 8 months and starting to go through seperation anxiety i cant leave her down. I try picking her and doing things that are doable with her.....i got a BUMBO and keep her on the kitchen counter singing and talking to her while i cook....or i try keepng her arounf the area i am working in (living room, bedroom, etc) with some toys and keep talking to her so she knows im there playing with her but not holding her. babies need their parents, and they let you know that, don;t deny them that.
2006-11-16 05:25:08 · answer #7 · answered by klumzy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We all have days where are patience is tested but you seem to have lost it completely. First of all a 10 month old needs you no matter what. So you might as well just get use to that. And you should be happy your 3 year old is wanting to potty train and telling you when she has to go. So many parents struggle with that.
If you are really that fed up with your life then you need to consider giving your children a chance in an environment where someone wants them, because it doesn't sound like you do. As for your husband, you dont have to be with him. I would also suggest seeking medical attention for all this frustration you have.
2006-11-16 05:09:53 · answer #8 · answered by Lisa 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋
You need to calm down and bring a family member over so that you can get away from the kids for a while.. If these feelings don't go away than you might want to see a therapist.. . I'm a stay at home mother and yes sometimes I get overwhelmed, but that's just part of being a mother.. it's all worth it in the end.. Don't take it out on the kids.. And you probably need to sit down and really talk to your husband about helping out here and there...Good luck, and don't stress out..
2006-11-16 05:03:49 · answer #9 · answered by Kat0312 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
OK I am a full time mom and I work and go to college full time I know how crazy it can be I don't have much help my husband works 2 jobs and he also goes to school full time. Ask family member if you can. Ask you daughter that goes to school to help out with the three year old and the three year can help out with some stuff. Take a breath and tell your husband that he can help to. DO NOT TAKE IT OUT ON THE KIDS!!!!!1
2006-11-16 05:58:20 · answer #10 · answered by dreamer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
been there done that pray that GOD himself will stregnthen your patients believe in your prayer allow that 10 mo.old to cry if she's not wet or hungry turn on a radio loud & when you can get a bible & read it try to do laundry when they are all alseep if you can get someone to pick up your daughter from school & they can take the 10 mo. old on that walk you may need to get a nannie to assist you i dont know if the county will help you to put a schedule together but i think you can call the wrap around program & they may be able to assist you if you have family members ask someone to step in & help you maybe to do laundry or come & cook once a week gl try to change your schedule make that lazy husband go pick up daughter & take the 10 month with him p.s. dont have any more kids
2006-11-16 05:10:02 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋