I have been seeing this lovely guy for just over a month now. He is 42 and i am 22. He has told me he loves me and that he wants to marry me/move in with him etc. He is a cop and even turned down a big opportunity to go away for a year(just so he could stay with me). So what i want to know is,do you think he's saying he loves me etc just to hold onto me(cuz i'm alot younger than him)or do you think he genuinely loves me?
2006-11-16 04:11:19 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
A little over a month...That's pretty fast to be talking about marriage. How do YOU feel about this guy?
2006-11-16 04:12:39 · answer #1 · answered by Barbi 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I highly doubt that he loves you, he is fascinated with you and the fact that you are 20 years younger than him. He likes the idea that he has a young gf, but its not love, he doesn't even know you well enough to love you. I wouldn't move in with him yet, and I would try to tell him that you need to take things slower. First you need to get to know him and then you will know if this is for you. Remember you are only 22, you would probably like to have kids some day, well in 5 years when you might be ready, he will 47 and won't have any energy to play with those kids. Think hard before you decide on anything!
2006-11-16 12:16:23 · answer #2 · answered by wantstoknow 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
If you're not ready let him know. Don't rush into anything just yet as you're both in the 'honymoon period' where everything seems great. He maybe very much in love with you and that isn't going to change if you both wait a little while longer. But from the sounds of things you don't feel like you have a secure realtionship with him (which is normal after only a month) so wait until you do. For some of us that takes years others months. Most importantly wait until you are both ready.
Good luck
2006-11-16 12:17:19 · answer #3 · answered by nell 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
A little over a month? And in that month - how many hours were you two together? Some thing's not right. Either he is so lost for you that he can't think, or he is trying to take you for a ride. At 42, I'm thinking the latter.
2006-11-16 16:44:15 · answer #4 · answered by mecasa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A month is too soon to be turning down big opportunities. There are definitely feelings involved but on what level is the question. Get to know him a little longer. If its love...it will be and probably be wonderful. If its NOT, then it will end itself in its own time. Don't worry about how HE feels....worry about how YOU feel. Don't make any rash decisions until you've thought them through completely.
2006-11-16 12:19:37 · answer #5 · answered by Miloree 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I don't know if he does or not,do you love him? I wouldn't do it because you haven't been with him long enough to see his other side and cops can be very controlling and possessive.Take it slow and tell him to take the opportunity he passed up because you don't want to feel obligated to him and I bet he will say some thing to you about having given up the job for you when he actually did it for himself,to be near you,it's not like you asked him too. some thing feels wrong here so take it slow.
2006-11-16 12:17:31 · answer #6 · answered by punkin 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It's way too soon to tell. It's only been a little over a month.
But I'm doubtful because he's almost twice your age. Marriage is a serious thing and by the time you two develop a serious relationship, he'll be like 45-50...
2006-11-16 12:12:33 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
He's in middle aged crisis. Yeah he wants a sweet young thing to show off to his buds. You have to see the age differance as a problem. 20 years older think about it. When you are 40 he's 60. 50 he's 70. and so on.
Do yourself a favor get someone your own age. Don't let him use you.
2006-11-16 12:26:21 · answer #8 · answered by Credit Expert 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
How are you going to feel in 10 years when he is 52 and you are 32. Don't go there, you can find someone else. 20 years is too much of a difference in age.
2006-11-16 12:16:57 · answer #9 · answered by Jan G 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
The fact that you had to ask after you just told us he didn't take a great opportunity because of you is crazy. You know the answer, yes of course. why would he do such a thing otherwise?
2006-11-16 12:28:10 · answer #10 · answered by WENDY G 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋