Im gay, but im only attracted to straight men.....what to do?

Answer 1

Dude! I have exactly the same problem. Living in a very conservative area I do it alot. Here are some tips on how to get around it based on what I do.
-Surround yourself with girlfriends and talk to them about it. They always come together and help you forget about the guy.
-Make a real effort to become friends with him. It may sound counter preductive but if you start to see him as a friend instead of a sex object then that is better and potentially more rewarding. I did this and that's how I found one of the best friends I've ever had.
-Visit gay bars and have sex. I know that this sounds rather immoral and disgusting but it could work.
-Find a hobby and immerse yourself in it. That way you can meet new people who are interested in the same things and help you to move on.

There are many other ways too. You end up picking the one which feels best for you. But there is ALWAYS a solution.

Good luck buddy.

Answer 2

You know I kind of have that same problem but Im getting over it. Maybe you feel like you love the conquest. Maybe you think you can change them. Or maybe it is because some of the guys you like flirt with you but will never go all the way. Go to some gay bars and so clubs so that way usually there are only gay men there and you might finally get one that you are attracted to and go for it. But good luck it is something hard to get away from.

Answer 3

I'm not exactly sure of how to phrase this, but a lot of gay men internalise the garbage they've heard all of their lives regarding being gay. They see themselves, and other gay men, as inferior - at least on some level. A lot of them wouldn't admit it or wouldn't even realise it. But this has a lot to do with gay men who are only attracted to heterosexual men.

What to do? Get over it. There's nothing more annoying than being pestered by someone that you are really not interested in at all. That's the position you put heterosexual men in. Plus, they really don't need their egos massaged. Quite honestly, it's pathetic. I know that sounds harsh, but it's how I see it.

Answer 4

Ads, are you attracted to straight as in heterosexual men, or straight as in, stereotypically straight in terms of behaviour - i.e., masculine, sporty, rugged? I expect it's the latter, in which case get your footie kit on and get yourself along to any of the many club nights that cater for exactly this crowd, such as Fitladz (at Area, Vauxhall), Rude Boyz (at Fire, Vauxhall) or Shoot (Central Station, King's Cross) where you'll be spoilt for choice. If you genuinely are only attracted to men who are actually heterosexual, I'd suggest you reflect on what it is you don't fancy about gay men - are you scared of being pigeon-holed, stereotyped or discriminated against by association with what you consider 'gay' men to be? This could be symptomatic of self-confidence issues and there are plenty of workshops, groups etc where you can get help with that.

We all like a 'bit of rough Ads, but that doesn't mean we have to cut ourselves off from all the other options on offer!

Answer 5

I'm the same. There are gay men out there though that are str8 acting and are masculine rather than effeminate.

A straight man is the gay mans holy grail but getting one would be a contradiction in terms

Answer 6

This is exactly my problem and my best friends problem. For years we go out on London scene, been through dating websites, speed dating, and whatever comes to your mind and we face the same issue...a club full of a thousand gay men and not one single masculine guy we find attractive yet we would wake into a straight pub and fancy half the bunch in there! If there is one attractive guy I would fancy in a gay pub, it is the one straight man who came with his girlfriend and her gay best friend! For years we grow up attracted to masculine men and then get out to discover most (and I emphasis on most) gay men are over the top, dressed like they are super models, pretending to be something they are not, and thinking being bitching and calling their male mates (SHE, and look at HER!) as attractive. It must be attractive to some guys, but not for me.

My advice is stay away from straight men, you are wasting your time but what you need to focus is on 'Straight acting' gay men, they are normal looking, have real jobs, and maybe dickheads like some straight men but they are there to be found!...they are as rare as winning the lottery on the scene but there are some place were you can find these guys. If you are looking for something serious our experience is that Bear clubs as then focus on masculinity (you would find about 10% who are genuinely masculine there). For holiday destinations East Europeans and Middle Eastern, sad to say but these are places were men have to be men to survive. If you want to meet straight acting guys for quick fun, chat lines (very popular with bisexual guys), sex cinemas, and saunas. At all times, be safe!

Answer 7

I'm straight and do not find men at all attractive but I quite like the idea of (some aspects) of gay sex. So who knows, eh? Nothing is as black and white as it seems.

Answer 8

I would have to say that you have a very low self-esteem..no respect for gays, and therefore, no respect for yourself. You are in for a very lonely, wasted life if you do not get some help...real help with this issue. There are many gays in the same boat, have fallen for the "anti-gay" crap that is handed out by idiots. Respect yourself and your attitudes will change. Good luck, and I meant what I said about getting help. It would be a real bummer to go through life disliking yourself. Not very wise.

Answer 9

Well hello there big boy its nice to meet you.....sorry im straight and being a rotten tease.lol.

Anyway all the gay guys ive ever met have said that all straight guys are gay after about 8 or 9 pints of lager so get down the pub at closing time and......wooopee!!
lol

good luk!

Answer 10

Man that sucks! Try figuring out what attracts you to straight men, perhaps you simply havent found a gay guy w those same qualities. Good Luck to you!