My husband and I have been married two years. In this two years.. he hasnt EVER tried to wine and dine me... or do anything romantic. Sexually... its all about him. I love sex with him... but here is an example of 99 percent of our sexual coitus... he rubs my butt for about 15 seconds... takes off my underwear and slides it in. If I want an Orgasm... I have to be on top and do it myself. I am 8 mos pregnant and we have a 10 month old daughter. Yes... pregnant for two years. I have put him down out of such anger and frustration.. I have told him he sucks in bed, has no ding dong... etc.... and that is also because he ran me down all the time in the past .., telling me how awesome his ex-girlfriends were. HE especially went on and on about this one girl that was so perfect... yet everyone if his girlfriends and ex-wife cheated on him. HE is really into himself. I sit on the ground talking to him... while he watches television, or playing on the computer. He is more concerned with how his
2006-11-15 17:36:58 · 8 answers · asked by Anna Q 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Laww Enforcement badge looks... or buying things for himself... constantly looking at Cop movies, or things on the internet that are police related. HE pays no attention to me at all. He says that I am not affectionate... yet in two years... I have never failed to tell him I love him everynight before we sleep... its always me saying it.. and he responds I love you also... with his back turned to me. He sleeps with a pillow dividing us... and a blanket over his head. I am pregnant and he has been out of work due to an injury for 5 mos. In that five mos... having a torn rotator cuff... he has sat and watched me do 90 percent of the work around the house. My children tonight just told me that he treats me like crap and doesnt respect me at all... and when my step daughter was down here... she basically said the same thing... that he didnt treat me good at all. His ex wife said he almost ruined her . I dont know what to do. I am having a baby in 5 weeks and my sons love him. I am hurt!
2006-11-15 17:40:44 · update #1
Also lol... I am a mother of 6 children now... and I pay most of the bills. He just said to me last night... " You dont make me feel like a man." LOL! I take care of all his stuff... keep my house totally clean... cook my butt off... rub his back and feet nightly... rub his head all the time... and I am 8 mos pregnant... and he doesnt feel like a man???? Last baby I had.. he didnt even bring me flowers... we did nothing for our first anniversary... we did nothing for any holiday and for Christmas last year... I bought him an expensive knife and I got a febreeze machine from walmart... lol... and he doesnt feel like a man?
2006-11-15 17:49:26 · update #2
ALSO... WE GO TO CONSELING EVERY WEEK AND HE DOESNT APPLY A THING THE WOMAN SAYS TO US... IN FACT HE SAYS HE DOESNT CARE WHAT THE BI**** SAYS!
2006-11-15 17:52:20 · update #3
sorry to hear that. let him go and find your own freedom. being single and busy is better than someone putting you down constantly....believe me, i have been there. it's bad for you in every single way! let him go and start a new life!
2006-11-15 18:00:55 · answer #1 · answered by xyz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you talked to him about his selfishness? If he doesn't know how you feel, you need to tell him. If he doesn't listen, turn off the tv and let him know that you won't stick around very long if he continues to ignore your needs. There is no excuse for that, and he needs to know that you won't stand for it anymore. (That is, of course, assuming that you won't stand for it anymore)
Just be up front with him. He has to be willing to change a little, and you have to be willing to be patient with him. He won't change overnight, but getting him to do a little bit at a time will make a big difference.
If he refuses from the start, and you can't convince him through constant prodding, you need to tell him you will leave if he can't (or won't) make you happy in the relationship.
Don't let him use you as a breeding doormat anymore!
2006-11-16 01:48:16 · answer #2 · answered by toothfairy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It may not be that he's done w/ the marriage he's just self-centered and doesn't feel he has to work on it.. My husband didn't believe in foreplay either and never told me I was pretty and never wined and dined me. I don't think he ever saw me in a dress except for weddings and funerals. he's not going to change because he doesn't think he's done anything wrong. He'll tell you you're the one w/ the problem. Talk to him go to counseling and if that's his attitude you're going to continue living in a dead marriage.
2006-11-16 01:42:37 · answer #3 · answered by uknowme 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I assume you have expressed you wanted more then just him having sex? If after 2 years he's remains the same selfish man, then he's deaf or stupid! Maybe thats why the other women cheated on him. You need to tell him directly that he can either include you or just do it by himself. After reading your additional comments, please don't let him treat you like crap one minute longer, your children will thank you for it one day.
2006-11-16 01:47:14 · answer #4 · answered by frustrated 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm going through the same thing, only it's almost been 4 years for me. The only thing I can say is this, it doesn't change. The rest of the decision is yours :) Best wishes
2006-11-16 02:12:25 · answer #5 · answered by Mrs. Lucky 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Prayer is the best solution for you in this situation. Instead of asking to change him, ask GOD to change you, your heart, your spirituality and comfort you in this time of trouble. HE will hear you and work on him through you. HIS strength will be your strength. And if he doesn't heed the miracle working through you( your husband), then it will be his loss. You sound like a wonderful person. Stay strong.
0
2006-11-16 01:55:27 · answer #6 · answered by yakkamin 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to start planning for your divorce..
Open a seperate bank account and start saving money...
2006-11-16 01:43:20 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
GOD I ENVY YOU....I WISH MY GUY WOULD JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!
2006-11-16 01:53:22 · answer #8 · answered by IMCUTEBITCH 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋