Guys... How should a women approach you if she want to have a friends with benefits relationship with you?

Question

I have a friend with benefits relationship with this guy, but since I was new to the whole concept of friends with benefits I kinda treated it like a one-night-stand. I don't want any strings attached, I don't want a relationship, and I am not emotionally involved. I think that's why I was ok with treating it like a one-night-stand. What I do want however is to pick up the phone if I have had a stressful day, and say can you come over for about an hour or can we meet somewhere because I need to relieve some stress. I want to know what he does for a living, and I also want to know his last name that way if anything funny ever goes down I can tie it back to him. Since I have treated this like a one night stand so far I don't know how to go back now and ask those things without coming across as though I want more when I really don't. I just don't want to f**k a stranger for the next 6 months. So I am asking you guys what is the best way to approach this, and what questions should I ask.

DON'T JUDGE ME. I HAVE HIGH SELF ESTEEM, AND I LOVE MY SELF SO I DON'T WANT ANYONE THINK THAT I AM A WOMEN WHO HAS A FRIEND WITH BENEFITS BECAUSE THAT'S ALL I CAN GET. RIGHT NOW I HAVE TO MUCH GOING ON IN MY LIFE AND A FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS IS ALL I HAVE TIME FOR. THAT'S IT I AM IN MY MID 20'S AND I AM JUST ENJOYING LIFE WHICH IS NOT A REFLECTION OF MY SELF WORTH.


I SAID ALL OF THAT BECAUSE A SIMILAR QUESTION GOT THOSE KIND OF RESPONSES.

Answer 1

The best thing to do is be honest and upfront to begin with. If you are friends at first, then when it gets around to talking about relationships or the lack of, just say you want a friend with benefits nothing more. I have been that way for a couple years now and even when the sex part ends for whatever reason I still have a good friend! My number one rule is HONESTY and that the friendship is first and has to still be there afterwards! Try saying something like "if we go there will you still talk to me tomorrow?" that kind of breaks the ice and you can get a feel for if the friendship will survive :)

Answer 2

This is not an easy topic, not everybody react the same way, and getting involved in a relationship, creates feelings along the way.
If you want to live in this kind of relation, it may last until he feels pushed away by a new relation, then may become jealous, who knows? You may find yourself tied up to someone you don't love.
Always set clear boundaries before him.
You should really go by your instinct, only you know the guy you are dealing with. And if you see him becoming possessive, know when to stop it.

Answer 3

I definitely agree with you i havd the same thing but it went bad u should learn ,more about the guy but not too much or you'll get attached call him up nd tell him just that what do you think can we just keep it friendly with the same benefits like before it needs to b a mutual display of sexuality not one or the other bcuz it wont last at all. just watch out though if hes got u he might hav others to or if its makin him cheat on say his gf than thats just wrong but otherwise relieve the stress sex is the best way.

Answer 4

I hate to come across as a b**ch here, but the guy has feelings too and if all you're looking for is a booty call, buy a vibrator, that way nobody's feelings get hurt. Friends with benefits doesn't work, someone ends up hurt.

Answer 5

Make it happen the way you described how you want it to happen. Don't explain anything. Men like that anyway. Make him put up with hanging out, having drinks, talking about your problems before you go at it. Don't call it "friends-with-benefits"-it sounds tacky. Call the shots, he'll get the picture. I promise he'll go along with the program.

Answer 6

Hi, Let me be the 1st to volunteer to help you on this topic please,, and all you have to do is write me.... Not a kid, but a real man.... lol

good luck

Answer 7

why not . my opion?