Can you write a funny paragraph that includes these phrases?

Question

1. man, I wish there was a category like this on Jeopardy, I'd clean up.
2. well,,,,it's a big secret
3. why is that tractor in my backyard
4. snap out of it
5. isn't it romantic
6. I can't believe that Emmit won

Answer 1

Me: "So I can't believe that Emmit won!"
Jim: " He did? I missed the finale. Hey Sally, did you know Emmit won?"
Me: "SSSSHH!! Don't tell Sally!!"
Jim: "Why can't I tell Sally?"
Me: "Well...it's a big secret."
Jim: "It's going to be all over tv. It's not a secret."
Me: "Ohh...why is that tractor in my backyard?"
Jim: "Dude, snap out of it. There's no tractor in your backyard. We're not even in your backyard. We're in the library..."
Me: "I know, isn't it romantic?"
Jim: *long pause* "...no...I'm not so sure the library is exactly romantic...did you remember your medication today?"
Me: "I knew I was forgetting something...wow you're good, Jim! You always know exactly what is wrong with me."
Jim: "Man, I wish there was a category like this on Jeopardy, I'd clean up."

Moral of the story: .......I'm weird.

Answer 2

I was just sittin around daydreamin when my husband came in and said "I can't believe that Emmit won!" I said oh is he still playin with the Cowboys? "Snap out of it!", Daniel said It's Dancin with The Stars, god are you livin in a dream, woman? I closed my eyes, afraid to tell him what was really goin on in my mind. Why couldn't I think of the words to say? Why was it so hard? Anything else I could handle. If someone asked me about hiding a lover from your husband, "man, I wish there was a Jeopardy category like that, I'd clean UP!" But, no, I was gonna have to answer the most difficult question: "Why is that tractor in my backyard?" and where is the man that rode it here? I'd have to say "well...it's a big secret", but not anymore! All of this is gonna hurt him, and Billy Bob out there hidin scared that my husband will kill him when he finds out. What an affair! "Isn't it romantic?", I used to think. Boy, was I wrong!

Answer 3

"I can't believe that Emmit won! I can't beleive that Emmit won! I can't believe that Emmit won!" She heard her husband exclaim when he got home.

"Snap out of it!" she told her drunk husband as he stumbled in the front door "and explain to me just exactly why is that tractor in my backyard?"

"Well..." he slurred "I can't tell you. It's a big secret. Shhhh. But isn't it romantic?"

"Romantic? Ha!!. Man, I wish there was a category like this on Jeopardy...'Alex I'll take Dumbest Things my Drunk Husband Has Done for 1,000'. I'd clean up!

Answer 4

"Why is that tractor in my backyard?", I asked my neighbor. He said,"according to your husband, well....it's a big secret." I replied with a smirk on my face,"isn't it romantic!" I need to snap out of it...MY husband romantic?! "Man, I wish there was a category like this on Jeopardy, I'd clean up. They could call it 'wishful thinking' ".
Kinda like what Mario Lopez is thinking, "I can't believe that Emmit won, I'm the one with extra batteries in my pants!"