Married seven years. Thinking I should divorce. Need thoughts!!!?

Question

Everyone I talk with about this has an agenda so I am asking complete strangers for neutral thoughts on this issue. Wow!
Should I file for divorce or are the benefits worth it?
If I file, I lose all health insurance, life insurance and pension rights if something happens to him. He is now paying the mortgage (almost $2000) and all of the tuition for the two kids ($1800) without an argument. He left me and is involved with another woman so it feels that by not filing I am saying that it is OK. My son has cerebral palsy. One marriage is enough so I am not looking to marry again. Any thoughts?

I would like to hear from people with experience. Thanks.

Answer 1

I have never been divorced. I mist say, however, that it sounds as though the two of you are being responsible about this and it seems to already be planned/well thought out.

Your husband is willing to take on some of the major expenses, and he has already found another. It seems as though he has his m mind made up. Furthermore, you are already talking about finding someone knew and you have admitted you are not getting enough out of this marriage.

Ask yourself this question - why are you considering a reconciliation? Especially when you are both seeking others. I think if you can figure that out, you can possible come to the right decision - for you.

Answer 2

Since your husband has managed to cheat on you while youre at home taking care of your special need son, you ned to sue him for divorce and for everything you are legally entitled to. You will be awarded child custody, child support, the house and possible spousal support which could include your insurances and everything hes paying for now. So you would actually be better off without a guy like that and still maintain your lifestyle. Also what you do with your future is totally up to you and is no ones business out here. Sorry about your marriage and good luck to you and your sons

Answer 3

This is why I hate marriage. I think it should be outlawed. I've been married for a long time (separated for 10 years). I stayed for the kids. But there was nothing else in that union. I wish I knew then what I know now. You have to do whatever you think is right for you. Don't ask other people what you should do with your life.

Answer 4

Stay in the marriage until at least the kids are out of college and their tuition bills are paid. Then get a good lawyer who can get you health insurance, mortgage , alimony, and support, that you need. You have grounds. He left you for another woman.

Answer 5

staying married on paper to someone simply for financial gains seems like a strange arrangement..

are you sure that if you divorce, you couldn't work out some sort of financial settlement in your favor?

either way, he won't likely retire or die for many many years.. that's a long wait for life insurance and/or pension access..

i'd say divorce would be a good symbolic fresh start to your life, if not for anything else.. a chance to move on!

Answer 6

So he left you and you are staying married because you may lose your benefits....If you stay for that reason I don't think God would see it as a good thing, unless of course, you are celibate. However, if you should have someone else taking care of your needs and you are still married would that be considered adultery...So you will never have any good luck, because God don't like ugly!!!!

Answer 7

He left you for another woman? I would certanily divorce him. If he wants to marry that woman, he would need a divorce. I think you really need to speak with him on this issue, its pretty big .but i already gave you my opinion.

Answer 8

You have to choose between money or dignity...Your choice...