i am dating a guy that has been divorced, and I want to read his divorce papers. we are starting to talk marriage. what do i need to do or where do i need to go to do that? how should i go about it?
2006-11-15 09:05:48 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You are probably going to get bashed for even wanting to see them by people on here, but let me tell you from experience that you are one smart cookie! My "fiance" told me that he was divorce. In fact, he told that to his entire family. Guess what? He wasn't and him and his wife are still married 12 years later.
It's best for you to know the fact before you commit! How to get them? Do you know where the divorce was filed? If so, you can go to the record department and find the case number, then look in the books for the divorce documents.
Good luck!
2006-11-15 09:19:38 · answer #1 · answered by Royalhinney 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not get a detective to check him out? The bigger question is why? Why is he divorced? How long has he been divorced? How long have you been dating? Has the marriage talk just been in passing? Why do you need to see the paper's? Why not ask him?
Or is that the problem.
2006-11-15 09:20:25 · answer #2 · answered by believer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are getting ready to marry a man that you are afraid to ask him a question? What's the deal here, you should be able to talk to him about anything at all. Just tell that you would like to see his divorce papers. He should show them to you with out any problem whats so ever. If he don't want you to see them, think of that as a red flag if he does not want you to see them. There should be nothing to hide in a relationship on either side.
2006-11-15 09:29:09 · answer #3 · answered by SapphireB 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all why does it matter if you can read the divorce papers or not? Second IF you feel the need to -ask him.. If it's not that big of a deal he will let you read them. He should have copies of his divorce papers somewhere at home.
2006-11-15 09:10:34 · answer #4 · answered by Rain32 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
IF YOU HAVE SO LITTLE TRUST ON YOUR MAN YOU SHOULD NOT MARRIED HIM
but you can go the court house to check to see if he has already gotten a divorce as to able to read the info on the decree I don't know how much is on public record
you should ask if he has a problem coming clean with the info
all marriage talk should stop (meaning he has something to hid)
2006-11-15 09:28:52 · answer #5 · answered by waiting for baby 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel theres nothing wrong with u reading them. but the big question is doe's he? Have you ask him? If not you need to. If he tells you know and tells you why, then you have no business to. Leave it alone and just go on for want he has told you. If you go behind his back in read them you did not believe him. do the right thing..Read Ten Stupid Things Couples Do to Mess Up Their Relationships by Dr. Laura Schlessinger it's easy reading. I think it's chapter 1 it talks about this type of issue you have. What are keep secrets and what are not. I feel you need this book. You can go to Crown books or other book stores in get it.
2006-11-15 09:27:58 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why do you want to read his divorce papers??? Is there a particular or satisfactory reason?
Just ask the guy to read them. All he can say is yay or nay. I don't particularly understand why you'd want to look at the papers. If he were a widow would you request to see his wife's death certificate?
But don't go behind his back to read the documents. If you go behind his back and search for access to the papers that's sneaky and dishonest. Sneaking to find dirt about his past relationship definitely won't help the trust factor in your relationship with him.
2006-11-15 09:10:40 · answer #7 · answered by The First Lady 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You can go to public records for the county that he got divorced in...it would be on the clerk of courts website or you can just go there in person. But if something is telling you that something isn't right about what he has told you, maybe you need to postpone the wedding and let whatever this is reveal itself in time. It sounds like it is something going on, sit tight on this, if it is meant for you to be married to him, then you will be, just listen to your gut.
2006-11-15 11:12:04 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why do you want to see them? Do you question if his divorce is final, or worry about issues in the divorce? If so, it sounds like you have trust issues or concerns that should be dealt with before you ever consider marrying him. If you are worried about something, talk to him about it - if you can't, then you may want to re-evaluate your relationship.
2006-11-15 09:16:14 · answer #9 · answered by ktcruiser 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he won't show you...then he is hiding something. Find out where he was divorced and see if you can get a copy from the county records office.
Otherwise, dump him...if he is already being secretive...it just gets worse from here....
2006-11-15 09:09:26 · answer #10 · answered by Mikey ~ The Defender of Myrth 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋