ok- so my husband talked to this girl on the phone and kept it from me, so now i lack trust yet am willing to look beyond it. Now i would like to see his phone bills to see who he talks to, is it fair to ask this of him. does he deserve to be "monitored?"
2006-11-15 07:42:00 · 9 answers · asked by Tanyah 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Assuming that the information you gave is all there is to it, look past it.
If he's ever given you other reasons to not trust him, then look at the bill.
2006-11-15 08:08:52 · answer #1 · answered by Sera B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is not fair that he cheated on you in the first place so if you feel like you should want to check his phone records you are perfectly entitled to tha t feeling because you have been used and you have lost all trust in your man but if you can not forgive him and completely trust him than you should stress your feelings to him. If he is truly trying to be a better man than he will openly give up the phone records but remember if he *69s the girl and she does the same the number will not show up on detailed billing so you still will never know! So go to your man and let him know how you are feeling and maybe the two of you can use some relationship counseling!
2006-11-15 07:52:49 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to decide what you are really asking. If everyone played by the rules, if there is such a thing, then yeah, it might be fair....So what if he shows you his phone bills, he'll just use a different way to contact the other b*tch. So you can do all the check you want, it won't make a diff.....you two need to get a the heart of matter.....why he talked to her? may you don't listen. Why keep it from you? maybe you do the same. Stop avoiding the real problems.....you are only reacting to the symptoms.
Good luck
2006-11-15 08:20:11 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is being dishonest with the small things it is likely he is being dishonest with the big things. It would not be a bad idea to watch the phone bills close. He has to win back your trust and the only way he will do that is with full disclosure and time.
2006-11-15 08:08:08 · answer #4 · answered by hawkeye316 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forget "fair." He burned and stomped on "fair" when he talked to some hussy tramp behind your back. He put "fair" in a wood chipper when he lied about another woman to his wife, and then whined about you asking him to man up and show you who he talks to and where he goes.
Sneaks *have* to prove they are worthy of trust. Otherwise they just sneak around and never get held accountable for anything. Plus he is trying to put you, the person who hasn't done the lying, on the defensive. Typical cheater tactic.
If he will not open his wallet, the cell phone bill, his car's mileage indicator, his credit card statements, and his email inbox to you, then HE IS HIDING ANOTHER WOMAN FROM YOU.
He should be saying, "Look, I lied and talked to another woman I find attractive and I am thinking of cheating on you, so I need to regain your trust. Look at my credit card statements to see who I am spending money on. Look at my cell phone bill to see who I can and text message. I am sneaky so it's good for you to watch me. Otherwise I will just cheat and hope I get away with it and you will continue to believe me terrible lies."
But he isn't so I would MAYBE give him one more, no 3rd strikes, chance and if he doesn't shape up then let that sl*t have him. He found her when he was cheating on you so he will find her replacement when he is cheating on her.
2006-11-15 09:25:30 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well did you ask him who this girl was? If he is playing dumb then ..hell yeah, monitor him..guys do things (obliviously) and are blind to common sense at times (vice versa). Gotta swap those home wreckers out like flys! Keep 'em at bay, ur married yes u are entitled! F that!
2006-11-15 07:48:35 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes, watch his every move. He screwed up first of all, by not telling you he talked to a girl on the phone.....of course you're going to question him now...who wouldn't? Until he can be truthful, watch his every move!
2006-11-15 07:47:37 · answer #7 · answered by inlovewow 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes ... it's funny how that little of a thing can take trust away so fast... it is to bad that guys don't understand that ..
2006-11-15 07:57:52 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm a dude and I say that is totally fair. While you're at it why don't you lock his balls up in the closet !
2006-11-15 07:44:37 · answer #9 · answered by gozedown 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋