2006-11-15 07:28:42 · 19 answers · asked by gary k 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
We are starting to do that after 9 years... Its not a problem... more like we trust each other completely.. but want to have fun with our friends ya know? We dont always like to do the same things.
2006-11-15 07:31:06 · answer #1 · answered by yo mama 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Gary, this is a hard call. It could be nothing, but then again it could be the start of problems. There is such a thing as needing a little space, but when that space starts to go-you got trouble.
Some couple have no problems just doing their own things seperately. Other couples when they start doing this it's the beginning of the end. They forget they are a couple, or maybe just one of them does. It can lead to jealous and hurt feelings that are hard to recover from. If both the husband and wife agree to do this, then fine. But if one of the couple is being left home alone all the time, then it's not good. Marriage or being a couple is hard work, it needs to be taken care of, when one or the other is feeling left out or ignored-trouble.
As I said if both parties agree, and they both enjoy their seperate activities then it's fine. But if only one of them is wanting do these things, then it's is going to cause worry and upset. If you are the one wanting to do things seperately, then please please make extra special time for your partner. Don't let them feel left out or they are the ugly step-child, who's not invited to the party. Make dates and do little things to let them know they are still your number 1. That way there's no doubt, that the marriage is strong, and happy-that you aren't running away. Seperately doing things isn't wrong or bad, but if you don't take care it could be, so please be careful and remember to make time for each other too.
So, you won't be going seperately to divorce lawyers.
God bless us all.............
2006-11-15 11:41:45 · answer #2 · answered by totallylost 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No - it is only normal that after the initial "want to spend every second of my life with the parner" - and this can last for months, or sometimes years, you both then feel comfortable in your own relationships to go back to 'normality' of wanting to rediscover being with friends again and do things for own benefit. Now, if you never ever then want to go out as a couple, then that extreme indicated there is a problem. I am quite happy for my husband to do whatever he wants - it gives me some 'me time' with the baby and allows me to do whatever I want. Its not good either to be in each others pockets all the time. Thats when things could get monotonous.
2006-11-15 07:49:45 · answer #3 · answered by ribena 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps one of them has realised there is more to life in the sense that they want to experience new things on their own,but yes it could be a sign that all is not so happy,i would suggest they both take up activities that they both would enjoy,as different interests will soon begin to push a wedge between a couple.
2006-11-15 07:35:06 · answer #4 · answered by candyfloss 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is hard to say as you don't say weather you are arguing alot at the moment...if you are both happy with each other and feel secure then maybe it would be fun to go out with your friends sometimes so you can let your hair down and have a laugh and have something to talk about the following day...but if you are arguing and having problems at the moment maybe this is a way of ignoring your problems and maybe even looking for attention from the opposite sex to feel wanted and special again
2006-11-15 07:54:20 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only reason couple wants to split is that one or both involved are feeling unloved.
Here are some but not all reasons why they feel so:
Extra-marital affair - 27%
Family strains, finances - 18%
Abuse - 17%
Mid-life crisis - 13%
Addictions - 6%
Workaholism, neglect - 6%
Lack of communications magnify the above reasons.
2006-11-15 07:36:55 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nah...... every now and then in a relationship there must be a growth period.... this takes many forms...... eg going to the gym.... taking up new hobbies.... going out all the time....
as long as you set time aside for each other and remember to love and tell each other what they mean to you....don't be bothered.....
it may also give you some breathing space to explore things you would like to do....
p.s put a love note under her pillow tonight...
2006-11-15 08:23:20 · answer #7 · answered by David M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like a problem, yes. Having some alone time to pursue your own interests is not bad, but going out on separate dates is absolutely wrong. That marriage is not going to last long. If we are talking about unwed relationship, then it sounds like they need to break up and go their separate ways.
2006-11-15 07:51:38 · answer #8 · answered by rac 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, i go out all the time without my boyfriend, and he goes out too with his mates. we have always let each other do our own thing (we do go out together aswell) its a case of trust, i do get chatted up and im sure he does but who cares? i dont want to be with anyone else. Its nice to be an individual aswell as a couple.
2006-11-15 07:36:50 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Kind of yes kind of no. Is it all the time? Might becoming bored with the same ole ho hum. Really hard to say. Maybe this calls for a sit down before it becomes too late.
2006-11-15 07:30:53 · answer #10 · answered by Doreen R 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋