My husband and i went out on a limb. Our family friend's son was in jail over getting drunk and doing something stupid. He's basically 19 and a looser and isnt doing anything else in his life in the small town he lives in, exept get drunk. So his mom called us crying and begging us to get him out, they assured us he would leave that town, move in with us, clean up, get a job, pay us rent, and his bail bonds. So we let him relax for a few weeks, my husband used him to help him around the house. Yesterday my husband sent him out with a map, and locations of places to apply, no pressure, just "see ya at lunch time". 9am he leaves... no return. Finally got ahod of his mom (she's definitely holding in what she knows). He ended up 50 miles away at his aunts (about 5 miles from where he used to live).. gee, i wonder where he's gonna end back up. I wanna get back at him. He lived in my house, ate my food, and acted completly ungratefull in the prosess. Im so pissed. What can i do?
2006-11-15 04:58:37 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I have already contacted his public defender and probation officer. Im sick of people sqrewing us over when we try to be nice and help them out.... this is the 2nd time... Im done... but im not done with being mad at him... anyone have a similar experiance.... what did u do?
2006-11-15 05:00:23 · update #1
oh yes, and i am using the term "friend" VERY loosly.
2006-11-15 08:20:14 · update #2
I understand your anger and i sympathize with you. It feels like a slap in the face. However, you did a wonderful thing and helped a friend in need. Her stupidity and failure to see it shouldn't make you upset. As a matter of fact, people always forget the good and remember the bad. She may never acknowlege what you did for her. Let it go. Keep in mind, she is probably not a very good "friend" and definitely worth cutting off. Surround yourself w/ light and positive people...let the rest of them wallow in the their self-created misery.
2006-11-15 05:16:44 · answer #1 · answered by Petra 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Look, people can NOT screw you over if you don't let them. First of all, this is your "friend" not your relative and you cannot control the situation. You put yourself in that position and they just took advantage, so blame yourself. You can't fix everybody. Leave them alone and when things hit rock bottom, they will find a way out. Leaches always find someone to suck on, until they suck them all dry and they're at the bottom. Then they will straighten up. Tough love is called for in this situation and a bit M.Y.O.B. (mind your own business) on your part. Chalk all of that ungratefulness up to "life lesson" for you. Godloveya.
2006-11-15 13:05:35 · answer #2 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I do not understand your anger, you knew what this kid was like before he came into your home, Did you honestly believe that he would change because you helped him. The kid is a drunk he needs help but for his drinking and what it is doing to him.He has already learnd how to work the system by going around to all the people that he can mooch off, If you see him again give him a phone number to AA and that is all he will only get help if he is forced to, by being in a place where there is NO one to help him but himself as for you betrayed feeling , you sort of did that to you self,by not handling the problem properly to begin with
2006-11-15 13:19:54 · answer #3 · answered by rkilburn410 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Distance yourself from people like that.
Don't stress over your "wasted time", you were being charitable and that's good, but it doesn't need to continue by helping this family anymore or having it on your mind. It is robbing your energy.
Focus on the good things around you....your family...your kind husband....your home....your garden....your dinner....your faith.....
I think being 50 miles away at an aunts house sounds like a blessing :)
2006-11-15 13:09:17 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You and your husband are good people for trying to help your friends son. Your getting back at him wont solve the problem, nor do you need to continue letting this kid sponge off you. You have done what you can for him, so let him and his mom know you are done trying to help, and the ball is in her court now. I wouldn't expect to see any money either. Good Luck.....
2006-11-15 13:07:18 · answer #5 · answered by P-Nut 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Forgive. I know it may seem difficult at this point and time, but let me tell you the reward from that will be great later on down the road. You did the right thing by letting him stay, by being a good friend and having grace and mercy on him. We are all like that kid, disobedient and reckless, but we have God who forgives us freely if we have Jesus as our LORD.
2006-11-15 13:04:04 · answer #6 · answered by Light Bringer 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i would reevaluate the friendship. its time for him to go, his mom should be trying to get him on the right path. its not your business to straigten their son out. why doesnt he live with her?
2006-11-15 13:10:12 · answer #7 · answered by MiaDiva28 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Friends don't do thing like that are you sure this person is your friend you need to check it out. and be careful who you call you FRIEND
2006-11-15 13:02:49 · answer #8 · answered by Jamie H 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
pay someone to kick his ***!! Or bring him to Dr.Phil which ever works best for you!!
2006-11-15 13:05:54 · answer #9 · answered by chinesefoodruleZ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋