Im not yet doing the thing i asked about cheating with my husband and i just want to know if i do caught just like my friend i can still justify what im about to do. But Im starting to have feelings with him. some answered that i just want to have adventure. maybe this last question will lead me to the right thing. I think im falling inlove and im sure he is because his so sweet to me, he knows i love my husband. his trying to prove to me that i dont deserve my husband that i deserve to be with him and he want to leave his family for me..
2006-11-15 01:45:36 · 37 answers · asked by jhennie 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Cheat and your a weak and worthless s.l.u.t., point simple. Don't want to be with your husband? be honest, love your husband? be faithful. Want to be with 2 guys? be a s.l.u.t.
2006-11-15 01:48:35 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
get a divorce first. you seem to be a bit immature by the ambiguity displayed in your question. you love him but wanna cheat, but not actually wanna cheat. come on lady. It's no wonder why this guy takes advantage of you. He tells you anything and you believe it. He is only telling you what your husband isn't telling or showing which is more the better to communicate with hubby. if all fails, then divorce, separate. what's the need to cheat if you are obviously unhappy? leave the situation. why stay with him and want someone else? this guy you are referencing doesn't respect you or your marriage because a decent MAN would not meddle in a marriage or any committed relationship for that matter. he would let the relationship work its course first before he makes any passes or display any affection. and of course you already know he will cheat on you as well and when this new guy drowns out like your husband has, you will fall for another pimp that whispers honey in your ears. Babe i think you need some marriage counseling. Cheating is never the resort to any problem. Do your husband a favor and just leave him. dont be selfish. you are only going to set yourself up for trouble and in a nasty divorce battle. hope you dont have any kids because he can use your infidelity to take custody and get alimony/child support from you. think lady......
2006-11-15 05:34:25 · answer #2 · answered by ♣DreamDancer♣ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cheating is cheating and there's no justification for it. How can you say that you love your husband and then immediately say you want to cheat on him. You already are cheating because a thought is as good as a deed.
Are you really falling in love with this new man or is he just giving you something that you think is lacking in your marriage. You should talk with your husband and perhaps go to a marriage counsellor.
If you want to be with this new man who is not your husband, then you should do the right thing and wait until you're legally free to take up with him. You should remember too, if he's cheating with you now on his family, he'll cheat on you with the next woman who takes his fancy.
Shame on him, too, for trying to get you to cheat as well as wanting to leave his family for you.
I don't know you, your husband or your situation but your husband doesn't deserve to be cheated on. Nor does your "friend's" family.
2006-11-15 01:53:56 · answer #3 · answered by parsonsel 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is a disaster waiting to happen. If you choose to go ahead with it consider the consequences. Be prepared for divorce, dividing up all of your things and the possibility that your new love will cut and run in the middle of it. If your marriage means so little to you, why not get divorced first and let the man carry on with his life, then move forward with the other guy. Don't you owe your husband at least that much? I think you should think long and hard about this before you make a decision.
2006-11-15 01:54:35 · answer #4 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are feeling the need to be unfaithful? Is your husband neglecting you, are you bored, what are your reasons? First you need to work on those things with your husband. If nothing helps and you can do it then get divorced, you can play all you want then. If you can't get a divorce then only you can answer if having an affair is something you can live with, but don't count on him leaving his family until he actually does. Some men will say anything to get into a womans panties but usualy fail to carry through when the time comes to do so.
2006-11-15 01:58:43 · answer #5 · answered by medic 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If someone wants to leave their family for you...he will leave for you for anything too. Marriage isn't just about love...or sex. It is about maturity and mutually making decisions that create a good relationship.
If you cheat on your husband, you place no honor in the state of your marriage. If the "friend" will cheat w/you...he doesn't honor marriage either. There is no good that will come from cheating.
If you love him....then recognize that love is about wanting something different from what you are getting. He is saying that he will give you adventure, happiness, love...temporarily. Because it is easy to find anything in the short term.
Build from within your marriage. Develop yourself. Men come and go. Work with your husband. And if he is cheating on you. Or doesn't love you...then make a decision based on those behaviors rather than temporarily getting some "Love" from a stranger that just wants to escape from the hard work of his marriage too.
Don't listen to a man trying to convince you to be with him. IT is his sex hormones talking. If he was sincere...he would never ask! Love is about creating good outcomes. Ruining two marriages is not good for anyone.
2006-11-15 02:02:50 · answer #6 · answered by kishoti 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cheating on ones mate can cause lasting harm. Not only to you and your family, but to the one you are cheating with. This man will give up his family for you. To me he is just saying that to get you. He has no business flirting with you. You belong to another. Even though our husbands are older and are changing, they deserve the love of their wives. They deserve honesty. The reason they deserve it, is because of the commitment we made. And because it is a command from God, to be loyal to ones mate. It may feel nice to be given attention, and to be told nice things again. But the best thing to do if you feel lonely, or neglected. Is to speak to your husband, let him know your needs, and wants. He might not know what he is doing. You need to reconsider what you really want to do. And weigh the Pros's and Con's of the situation. To many marriages end sadly today. Not many want to try to work out their problems. Marriage is a sacred union between a man and women, and God the creator of marriage. Your marriage deserves you to at least try to work it out.
2006-11-15 01:59:14 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The way you have been telling the story here and in the other questions it sounds as though you are already cheating on him. You are not happy in this relationship with your husband with the way you are talking. So why don't you just get out and get a divorce from him so that way you both can be happy. You do not love him cause if you did you sure wouldn't be thinking of cheating on him at all. I hate cheaters, they are so nasty.
2006-11-15 01:59:01 · answer #8 · answered by SapphireB 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be honest with your husband and tell him your attracted to someone else and want to explore a relationship with him. If you want to destroy your marriage, and you will, do not go behind his back. Also tell him how much your husband means to you too.
Check out:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polyamory
and have your husband and your friend read it too. it might just break the ice on the discussion. But don't.... and I mean don't.... ever do anything to hide your feelings about this other person from your husband and never lie or go behind his back (don't throw it in his face either). And don't do anything, no matter how important it is to you, unless you and your husband understand what it means to your marriage.
It will change your marriage, maybe for the better, that happened with me, and maybe for the worse. It all depends on the emotional foundation that your marriage is based on.
2006-11-15 01:56:47 · answer #9 · answered by jryanwinterhaven 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, until he leaves his family you have no way of knowing if he is truly there for you. That's one of the oldest lines in the book! Besides the normal considerations (hurt, betrayal, trust, etc.) you have to look out for yourself. What happens if you cheat, your husband finds out, and your lover goes back to his wife? This happens a lot. What will you do then? Will you be comfortable living all by yourself? If yes, then maybe you should just leave your husband in the first place and spare everyone's feelings.
2006-11-15 02:11:58 · answer #10 · answered by Christabelle 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Um-mm... Well, I have been in a relationship for 4 years and we have a baby together. I can't say I haven't looked but.... I don't want to leave my man. I have seen this kind of thing blow up before and it boiled down to one thing.
If he's cheating with you, what makes you think that he isn't going to cheat on you???? (once a cheater, always a cheater)
Besides, if you cheat on your husband with this guy, is he ever REALLY going to trust you?
It might seem really great of him to say he's going to leave his family for you, but that's just scary. Imagine how his kids (if any) would feel about that......
I say no way. This is a recipe for disaster. Your husband loves you, don't throw it away....
2006-11-15 01:55:00 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋