ie - your partner comes to you and says that your sex life is up the creek, and he/she has an idea to spice it up [have a threesome]. would you consider this scenario to please them, or would you be completely against it and end the relaitionthip [well, maybe not end it, but put your foot down against the idea, and say there are other ways to sort it out].
both men and female answer.
all is welcome!
2006-11-14 23:37:24 · 33 answers · asked by Sean J 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I would have to think so very long and hard about doing this. You have to wonder about the real motivation. If the relationship is in jeopardy then this isn't the answer, it will only cause more problems. You will always be wondering if the only reason this was suggested was because your partner knew that they wanted to be with someone else and this was a way to do that without dealing with the real problem.
I hope things work out for you.
2006-11-14 23:42:58 · answer #1 · answered by kara3967 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a gay man, I've done a few 3-somes, and most fall a bit flat.
However, I had a very nice looking guy as a boyfriend, and he had a close friend who really fancied him. I also found this friend very attractive, so in order to satisfy everyone, we had a threesome, and it was brilliant.
The strange thing is, it actually strengthened the relationship of my boyfriend and myself, and put the mutual friendship we had with the other guy on a higher level of intimacy and understanding.
For almost five years after that, it was a sort of semi-permanent "triangle," when the friend would come around, and sleep with me, my partner or both of us at the same time, depending on how knackered or how randy each felt. Sometimes he just slept over, cuddled up between us without anything happening at all, and that was also very nice.
Most of the others have been a bit boring or meaningless, but that first guy was a bit special, and it worked, without causing any jealousy or resentment.
I don't think it is something couples should actively seek out, but if it happens naturally as ours did, with someone who is very close, then it can be extremely good and emotionally very rewarding.
2006-11-16 01:30:07 · answer #2 · answered by musonic 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
During a period of "relationship failure" I had considered that due to my suspicions that my partner was being unfaithful.
I did discuss it with him and he still to this day says he never was unfaithful.
At that time I found myself thinking about him with someone else and fantasizing about him with someone else (how messed up is that) it was torturing to me however I was actually becoming interested in my fantasy.
I do believe that for me a threesome would be nothing but damaging to my spirit and probably something that would be terribly uncomfortable and breed nothing but more lack of trust and insecurities in my relationship. This would eventually cause us to move into complete failure I would think.
For me sex with others is not attractive beyond a brief fantasy in my own mind. Sex with a stranger is not comfortable to me, never has been, in order to be satisfied and turned on I need more then just the visual or lustful moment to peak my desires for someone.
Depth of spirit, communication, friendship, love, and all that good stuff is what paves the road for intimacy with me.
So I vote for putting my foot down or ending the relationship!
2006-11-14 23:54:26 · answer #3 · answered by Crampy Grampy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
actually, I've already done this. I brought in a guy for my wife. She was oversexed anyway and with two guys working her over, it was just what she needed. I really got off seeing her having a good time too. The guy just needs to know that there are boundaries and you must trust your wife NOT to see him alone.
that is a RULE that MUST be followed. You have to do these kind of things as a couple.
2006-11-15 02:20:48 · answer #4 · answered by a1tommyL 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
when i was last with a man i used to suggest a threesome often me him and a woman, but now im with my girlf i could not do it, and would go mad if she suggested it (which she would not).
me personally cannot sleep with someone else even if it is with my partner whilst i'm in love, and if i was to agree to it to make my partner happy it would most likely end our relationship
each to there own and if you enjoy it good luck to you i'm all for having the best sex life but my personal opinon is that it would cause complications in your relationship
2006-11-16 23:02:40 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't do it if your partner means a great deal to you. I did this, I took my Bf to do a customer with me and it was a nightmare as I act differently with him than I do with my customers, not a good idea. but if it's a last ditch attempt to save a relationship I'd do it for the experience, so next time you know the answer yourself
2006-11-15 00:46:58 · answer #6 · answered by Powerpuffgeezer 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO! Inviting people into your bedroom will only lead to problems. Everyone Ive known who has tried has had a bad result form trying this. One couple decided to try and the boyfriend wound up screwing the other (new) guy while his partner was away and eventually left his partner for the new guy who was invited into the 3some.
2006-11-15 01:12:03 · answer #7 · answered by david s 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
In short no. Not against others doing it, different strokes for different folks an all that but for me personally seeing the man I love sh4gging somebody else is a big no no!
2006-11-15 01:20:37 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a guy I would never have a threesome with my girlfriend & if she suggests it then I would try my best to teach her that there are psychological ramifications & it could easily destroy our relationship. I would have a threesome for the fun of it if I didnt have a steady girlfriend though.
2006-11-14 23:44:33 · answer #9 · answered by Claude 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Wanna risk loosing your lover? Do the threesome.
I AM WITH my boyfriend of 12 1/4 years, because I took him away from his lover, when we met during a threesome.
Id never do that again, but if I hadnt, I wouldnt have met him and knew instantly that I HAD to have him to myself.
BE careful, cause it can happen to you.
2006-11-15 00:55:48 · answer #10 · answered by . S 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋