I can not stand liars. I would rather get hurt from what they have done to me rather than get hurt from their untruthfulness. I would rather people tell me what they think of me to my face, and not behind my back. I can not be a b!@+ch and pretend to be someone's friend when I am not. Doesn't mean I have to be mean to them, just that i don't have to pretend that I love them. I tell people what I think, but not to hurt their feelings. I don't care what the answer is, so long as its the truth. Its because I don't care what people think of me, and I know I will always have a great bunch of friends with me, no matter what. If i know someone is being mean to me, or backstabbing me, or just *********.i.n.g about me, I confront them. I don't take revenge, just confront. Some people don't like me because of this. I'm not like other girls who can fake kindness. Does this make me a bad person because i tell people what i think upfront? Should I change and keep my opinions to myself?
2006-11-14 22:27:00 · 14 answers · asked by Pennexx 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Should I just be nice to everyone, no matter how badly they treat me? I am so confused. I don't understand. Am I so bad?
2006-11-14 22:28:39 · update #1
There is no need for the whol eworld to love you as long as you have a special circle of freinds & family who recognise your virtues & love you for it.. Keep going as you are, People will eventually see that you are right!
2006-11-14 22:34:46 · answer #1 · answered by Mock-mast 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't sound like a bad person to me, it sounds like me. And like you I have never had a lot of girl friends, but those I do have I would trust with my life.
I have talked to my girl friends about this and basically it comes down to strength of character. Some people are strong enough to handle the implications of the truth and confrontation, and some feel intimidated by it. Those that feel intimidated will think of you as a bad person because they didn't like being confronted by their mistakes. If they are confronted with them, then they have to take responsibility, often people who treat others badly are doing it because of their own insecurities, so facing the responsibility of their actions also means facing their insecurities. And that is where strength of character comes in.
I don't think you should change, I am 31 and being this way has gotten me through times I have found tough. It has brought relationships closer, even after heated exchanges because they understand exactly where they stand with me.
2006-11-14 22:36:41 · answer #2 · answered by chelles_insanity 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am about the same as you. I refuse to be different than who I am to be "accepted". I am straight forward and honest to a fault. But, sometimes it is better to remain silent or use diplomacy in certain situations. For example, my husbands parents are staunch republicans. When politics arise as a subject, I just excuse myself from the situation. I do this for my husband's sake because otherwise things would get very ugly due to some of the comments that they make.
THere is also a difference between being honest and being mean. If you are saying things about someone just to be mean, even if they are honest, then that is wrong. There is too much anger and hatred in this world to spew more. But in defense, all bets are off--say what you want.
The result of being honest and being yourself is what you have found out for yourself, you may have few friends but the ones you do have are the only ones worth having.
2006-11-14 22:35:32 · answer #3 · answered by Hillaryforpresident 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Liars are the worst!
If you confront full on..that may be a little more than they like!
I do too sometimes...so we just confront,nicely...lol
In no way are you a bad person!
But....people have died by being told the Truth!..so best to be careful, not to hurt anyone....People do have feelings don't they, so we just have to be mindful.
2006-11-14 22:36:16 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
from journey ive had both a competent formative years a million-12 then after I grew to develop into an adolescent my moms and dads divorced and we struggled alot i'd could say it completely relies upon on how the guy see issues in his life dealing with both i strayed off into undesirable issues drugs and what not yet now im a better individual i discovered even as suffering between proper and incorrect soooo i determined i wasnt going to be undesirable i replaced my conduct and issues..there is a few truth in what your putting forward yet usually some thing could ensue undesirable human beings come from reliable and undesirable childhoods reliable human beings come from reliable and undesirable childhoods also it only relies upon which way the youngster makes a call to bypass. only because i ended up there (undesirable tennage life) i knew i wasnt going to stay there.
2016-11-24 20:37:33 · answer #5 · answered by lempicki 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should not change. The world would be a much nicer place if everybody was totally honest with one another. There are times when you need to be diplomatic towards others, and there are times when you need to speak your mind. You should be nice to everyone but you should never lose sight of who you really are and what is right.
2006-11-14 22:51:13 · answer #6 · answered by Maverick off Top Gun 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are brutally honest and that is good. I am the same way. I do not care for liars or people that have such low opinions of themselves that they have to make fun of others. However, it is not always wise to be too honest. You just have to know the difference beteween hurting someone and honesty.
2006-11-14 22:33:24 · answer #7 · answered by Val 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Watch yourself to make sure your not judging them. Thats not your job. Make sure what your saying is goign to lead them correctly and not just in the direction YOU think they should go. Also learn about people, some are not worth opening your mouth for, just stand by and watch them go, unless they get in your way.
Dont turn into a priss. Just learn to follow, then learn how to lead. Because what Iam seeing is a leader, but I think all you have to do is polish up your skills alittle. A good leader tells his/her people what they need to hear, but in a way that it makes them think and not in a way that makes them confrentagious.
2006-11-14 22:37:58 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No your not a bad person,Its hard for people to hear the truth,sometimes you do have to keep it to yourself if you no its really gonna hurt someone or try to tell them in a different way!!!
2006-11-14 22:34:14 · answer #9 · answered by troble # one? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no ya shoul;dnt be nice if someone hurts you (i hope they dont) you have very right as a person to be upset with them but yeh id rather be told the truth from the start i think it hurts less this way maybe im wrong i dont know but this is my personall thoughts anyway
2006-11-14 22:49:46 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋