been together since i was 15, i am now 50, i love him, but i don't feel whole. i feel empty inside and need some companionship,
2006-11-14 20:21:59 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
we have talked about it for many years and never seem to come up with a solution. im thinking of having an outside relationship. do you think he will find out?
2006-11-14 20:30:15 · update #1
I would say you need to talk. He may be feeling the same way, and just doesn't know how to tell you. You could talk and find out that what you both need is actually to spend more quality time with each other. Try and find some kind of common interest. Spice things up. Break out of the everyday ruotine, and take a trip just the two of you. Look for, and I bet you will find the spark that has kept you together for 35 yrs. Good luck.
2006-11-14 20:37:57 · answer #1 · answered by Thursdays 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If we look to another person, no matter who they are, to fill our emptiness we will sooner or later feel emptier. You have to figure out within yourself that which is wrong or missing and help yourself. If you still love your husband then pushing him away might not be the answer for you, only you can know for sure. Maybe the answer is changing you for yourself. Becoming the person you need to be. If being married though is suffocating the person you need to be then you are going in the right direction. Honesty is the best policy, so if you really truly want to end your marriage, then no matter how hard it is for you to do, you have to tell him how you feel, and what you want to do. Also, regarding your additional remarks do you want to be with another man for companionship, or to get back at your husband for his wandering ways? Best of luck.
2006-11-15 05:13:03 · answer #2 · answered by Tracie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is your time now go out and live, Don't sit home when you know you want to go, You need to remember, YOU are the best judge of how you feel and what you need and want,
I'm in the same position only I'm the husband, She had countless affairs aproximately 10 yrs ago, We were together for 26yrs starting at age 16, We waited until the kids graduated HS we just separated, I will be happier, I believe she will too, She's been miserable since her affairs, as have I, good luck
2006-11-15 05:43:44 · answer #3 · answered by Deucecouper 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why don't you talk to your husband about your feeling and what you need before you tell him you want a divorce? I think 35 years is not a short time..both of you should know each other well enough..so he should understand you..
but if you really sure that divorce is the best choice, then just tell him nicely at dinner time
2006-11-15 04:32:44 · answer #4 · answered by fr4ng1 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love is hard to come by. If you love him and he also has some feelings for you then you need to talk. 35 years is a long time Try and find common ground and stay together Forgive each other and start anew
2006-11-15 04:27:13 · answer #5 · answered by R C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love him, then you shouldn't divorce him. And don't go for an outside relationship either, that's just cruel. Tell him how you feel and try and sort things out together.
2006-11-15 04:50:54 · answer #6 · answered by mmmb 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please don't do something you will be sorry about later. Talk to him and tell him just how you feel, it may hurt him some but if he loves you enough he should try to be more of a companion, like talking over his problems and yours. You may consider talking to a marriage counselor. If all else fails consider a seperation for awhile and see if you really want a divorce.
2006-11-15 04:40:27 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
With years of living with a person, one knows the person fully including his/her shortcomings.This & predictable responces make any relation to go stale.You said you still love him. Go on vacation, do something which both of you have not done before.Rediscover him again.Still If you feel really to divorce him, start annoying him, start on fights, He will pay for the divorce!
2006-11-15 05:03:02 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're old... What are your plans after the divirce? Find another man to be with you? Haven't you learned that your husband knows everything about you? He knows your strength and weaknesses? And he's the one who can help you?
anyway, that's just your decision. If your problem is how to tell him... You know it's easy to tell him. Just talk to him. But if you still love your husband, you can't tell it to him.
2006-11-15 05:06:31 · answer #9 · answered by bembie719 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well unless you do something, nothing's going to happen. Talk to your husband, contact your lawyer and have the papers drawn out.
2006-11-15 06:11:15 · answer #10 · answered by the_memory_of_ashes 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋