My fiancee & i have been having problems for about 3 weeks now (on & off for over a year but really bad this time) and i dont think he wants to marry me anymore. I love him and dont want to be with anyone else. We have a 3 month old son together and have been together for 2 and a half years. Being with him makes me so happy and i love any time i get to spend with him. lately he has been spending less and less time with me. he doesnt kiss me when he leaves or when we go to sleep. He used to do these things all he time for no reason at all. We rarely have sex anymore and we used to do it about 5 times a week. If anyone has any suggestions about how to remedy my situation, i would greatly appreciate it. thanks
2006-11-14 16:47:01 · 15 answers · asked by Aprylle 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If your fiance doesn't love you anymore, then there is nothing you can do about it. It is really hard, but you will get over it. It's better that you know now than later on. If he is cheating on you or lying to you right now, chances are he will do it to you when you're both married. You can't change a man but you can change yourself.
For me, I've beg, tried to change and even threatened suicide to get my boyfriend back but he's had a change of heart and he even told me he didn't love me anymore and that he's met someone else. He was my first love and I spent many days crying and thinking about him to the point where I got physically and mentally ill. That is the risk of being in a relationship. You will never know how long it will last. The hardest part is to accept the fact that no matter how hard you try you alone can not save this relationship and that you need to think about yourself and your baby RIGHT NOW so the both of you can move on. Surround yourself with family and friends, keep yourself busy and go out to meet other people. You will find someone else who will love you and appreciate you more.
2006-11-14 16:56:50 · answer #1 · answered by bubbalicious 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well... you can always call off the engagement, but.... you will probably have to prepare yourself of losing him for good, because he will be extremely heartbroken. It seems like you've established a history of wanting something really bad and then regretting it later, so give yourself some time and think really hard about this. What if you call off the engagement and regret that decision too? Of course, there's an easier way out for this. No one says that you need to get married right away. You can always decide to enjoy your engaged life for a few years before you proceed with the wedding.
2016-03-28 06:09:10 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like your beloved fiance' may not be as loyal as you think. This kind of a Dr. Jekyll/ Mr. Hyde mood swing usually indicates that a man is feeling guilty/trapped, and wants out. Since you two have a child together and an extensive history, maybe you should try couples therapy. Getting to the root of the problem with a licensed professional is a great way to save your relationship and help you rekindle your love. All the best to you :)
2006-11-14 16:53:50 · answer #3 · answered by danni_d21 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he works and helps with household chores and the baby, he may just be tired. It is a totally new routine that I am sure probably has you somewhat tired. A new family takes some time to get into new routines. If he is not interacting with the baby like playing, holding, feeding, find out why and encourage him to do so. He may not be so sure how to handle a baby and afraid of hurting it or doing something wrong if this is his first child. Literately take baby steps and get a baby sitter if you can and try to get some one on one time with him, it just might help.
Give it some time for things to fall back into thier place with your relationship with him and enjoy this new and wonderful threesome.
2006-11-14 16:57:33 · answer #4 · answered by prayingangel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's probably decided the responsibility of wife and child are too much for him. If that be the case you need to come up with a plan for you and your baby. Because sooner or later either he will leave, or you'll be so miserable, you will leave.
So, you need to be discussing your situation together. To be able to define exactly what the problem is, in order to resolve it.
2006-11-14 18:00:43 · answer #5 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not get married unless you BOTH want it... if he is showing signs of not wanting to, you need to talk to him...
1) he may be scared about getting married. Some people get freaked out by a little piece of paper... even though they have been living as husband and wife, that piece of paper scares them...
2) He may not want to get married yet, or not at all... but by all means, do not get married if he doesn't' want to or is not sure... If he needs more time, let him have it... If you needed the time, wouldn't you appreciate it? give him the same respect....
Don't be pushy, but you must must must talk to him... communicate.... no matter what the outcome is..
Good luck honey!
2006-11-14 17:07:39 · answer #6 · answered by Q'S & A'S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first of all you can not remedy this situation at all he will have to considering it is his problem not yours . Talk to him really sit down and tell him you want answers on what is going on between the two of you. None of us know that only he does. But, be ready to take whatever he has to say.
2006-11-14 16:50:54 · answer #7 · answered by sammy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only solution will come from communication. You absolutely have to talk to him. You can't resolve it by yourself - it requires partnership. Just tell him how you've been feeling AND make it safe for him to say "yes, I'm not sure I want to be married yet." Because if he feels he can tell you the truth, that's going to be so incredible for both of you.
2006-11-14 16:49:40 · answer #8 · answered by ixi26c 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't get married, it's the leading cause of divorce!
really, why get married if things were better before it was in the picture? I'm sure your son won't be a minority these days.
2006-11-14 16:50:47 · answer #9 · answered by mati 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like he is having a relationship on the side. I would just ask him if he wants to call it off. Better to do that than go through what you are going through. Maybe you will find out what is wrong asking him.
2006-11-14 16:50:11 · answer #10 · answered by Sparkles 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋