am i completely crazy or is this obvious to others aswell?

Question

im sick of hearing people say adhd and other behavior issues, don't exist...BULL***T!
No, the bad behavior is not an illness
No, the tantrums are not an illness
But they are symptoms of other underlying conditions, like anxiety, depression, and other mental issues
children are not able to control these feelings they often are scared of what they are feeling and they don't understand what is happening and this manifests itself into this explosive, sometimes violent, and usually uncontrollable behavior
its not just bad parenting or a lack of discipline, these children genuinely do not know how to deal with these feelings and therefore they act out.....adults with these kinds of problems are able to handle themselves better in these situations, why do we feel sorry for adults suffering from these problems but we just put it down to bad parenting if a child is suffering

Answer 1

ADD and ADHD do exist. I had different thoughts before I had a son that just had so much nervous energy, we did not know what to do. And no one considered me a bad mother. (I disciplined him appropriately without violence- I was not going to beat the child for every infraction- it would have been non stop- you just have to have the insight as a parent to know when something works for your child, and when it complicates things or makes more problems.)
I have a calm personality, but when I was a kid, I was a daydreamer and had difficulty concentrating at school. No one understood me. That was before there was any acknowledgment that attention deficit disorder existed, so there were not any modifications made in the classroom.
My son has attention deficit with hyperactivity. Extreme figiting, and uncontrollable laughing around other children. I thought, well, at least he is happy! But he had trouble listening to directions, and had to be reminded and redirected often. These kids aren't stupid- he tested with a well above average IQ, and could remember long term facts, but may not remember what you told him 2 minutes ago. He had no learning disability, that is something different. When he was in the lower grades, medication was necessary for awhile- but now, through classroom modifications, he is learning to do what he needs to without the meds.
There are a lot of skeptics out there, but the main thing we all need to remember is that not every kid is the same. We all learn by different stimuli, and mature at a different pace. The world wants to make cookie cutter people, but God made each of us unique. It makes my soul hurt when I think of how many wonderful traits are overlooked in so many children because no one looked beyond just trying to cram them into a mold.
Most people who think ADD is just a case of bad parenting have never had to parent a child that has it- that's 24-7, and have never read all the available information out there. In other words, they are completely uninformed, and just making assumptions.

Answer 2

NO you are not crazy,at least not as far as your question is worded.
Not all adults are able to appropriately handle themselves better in these situations. That is why there are so many psychotic, anti-social mental illness in adults. The adults who have these issues have had them much longer than children which makes them more deeper, compounded and often longer to correct or revers.
However it is so often it is bad parenting if the child is not taken for professional help at an early stage when the problem is less and easier to prevent or correct.
Just as one would think it is the responsibility of the adult to seek professional help, like wise it is the adult responsibility for the parent or adult care giver to intervene in children's bad behavior.

Answer 3

There will be a few children who have medical or mental problems but my feeling is that the childhood behaviours you refer to are caused by parental influence or lack of it. Smoking and drinking, swearing and fighting , and failing to be consistant in disciplining them as well as relying on too many processed foods, are just some of the things that influence their behaviour. The list is endless. Parenting is so difficult and important it should be a compulsory subject in the last two years at school.

Answer 4

Good observation and no, I don't think you are crazy. I happen to agree with most of what you said and if you are crazy for your theory then I must be crazy too. I think your reasoning is pretty logical and can't understand that people are so easily conned into all the hype. Or those that use ADHD as an exscuse for just plain bad behaviour. Gosh, every second child I meet these days seems to have been diagnosed with it. What a load of bollocks! Somebody,somewhere is making a load of money...........OR me and you should be booking ourselves into the nearest psych ward :)

Answer 5

I think they do exist but the cases of just plain lack of parental disipline/ guidance that are misdignosed as being adhd are more and more common.

With several of my family having to bear the brunt of poor parenting as teachers it does make me wonder if the whole society concept of not smacking kids when the do wrong is the cause.

Like i said i do believe it exist but it seems to be an easy out for doctors to pescribe medication rather then treat the actual cause these days, beside who wants to be told by their doctor they are simply just not having enough to do with providing attitude guideance for thier kids?

this is my views and hope you dont get offended.

cheers

Answer 6

everyone is add or adhd to an extent. Nothing is black or white unless you are ill from a foreign body or physical handicap (virus, infection, amputee, etc...).
That said, you can have an attention deficent disorder on any level from no symptoms to extreme symptoms.
I agree, by the time children reach adulthood, they mature into finding out how to deal in their own unique way with their personalities and their level of add/adhd.
What I don't agree with, are drugs. Kids won't learn to deal with their own problems if those problems are avoided through drugs/giving them a false reality. Drugs change who you are, and an amphetamine is an amphetamine whether it goes by cocaine, adderall, crack or ritalin.

Answer 7

I completely agree with you. I have 2 sons who were diagnosed with ADHD. It put such a strain on the rest of the family and one of them tried to commit suicide. Usually, they outgrow it by the age of 25 - 30 but some never outgrow it. Thank goodness there are groups to assist parents and siblings in coping with it, here in Australia.