i have this collegue who whenever i offer to help, he just refuses or simply ignores me. i swear i'm just trying to help. i have 10 yrs experience and this is his first job (but he's not young) i keep telling myself "shut ip, don't say anything" but sometimes i can't controll myself. i even put my earphones on so that i won't listen to stuff happening around me .... i know, iam stupid and i should stop trying to help, but i do enjoy helping others... maybe i should become a social worker, huh?
2006-11-14 12:05:01 · 5 answers · asked by curly 2 in Business & Finance ➔ Careers & Employment
and tohers do appreciate my help, and ahve told me so, but just this guy how is actinga like a real jeark...
2006-11-14 12:05:54 · update #1
i am not his supervisor, we just work together. i understand he is inexperienced and may feel threatened. i have stopped volunteering my help.
unfortunately this is the first time someone does not welcome my help but i guess there is a time for everything.
2006-11-16 14:05:27 · update #2
If this is his first job, your co-worker is probably very insecure about his job performance and sees your offers to help as your letting him know that you are much better at the job than he is. It is hard to sit by and let someone make mistakes when you know how to avoid them, but you need to let him do his own work and sink or swim. If you feel the need to offer help, let him know that you are available to help if he needs it, and then leave it at that. He will need to develop some confidence in himself in order to ask for your help. Let him do that on him own.
2006-11-14 12:55:38 · answer #1 · answered by bugged 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He probably thinks that you're offering to help him because you think he can't handle it on his own (he may be right...maybe he can't!). It's a new job for him and he wants to look capable and competent; he's afraid that accepting your help will make him look unqualified.
He knows now that you want to help him...why not just sit back and wait for HIM to ask YOU for help. When he's a little more sure of his standing at work, he won't feel so threatened by accepting your help. At that point, you can start being the helpful person you want to be!
Bottom line is...you can't force someone to accept your kindness.
2006-11-14 12:18:06 · answer #2 · answered by Jen A 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends on your role; are you expected to train others? If not, don't. You could be violating his boundaries and creating a hostile work environment. If that is part of your job you need the support of your supervisor to reinforce this expectation and the employee may need to be terminated if unwilling to learn.
2006-11-14 12:14:06 · answer #3 · answered by G-Man 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is a good one. I used to be just like you. I would always try to help someone when they where not doing the job the way I would. You have to be able to let it go and let him do it his own way. When you are always trying to help him, he may see it as you are micromanageing him. Just tell him if you get stuck on something ask me and I would be happy to help, and give him a compliment every now and agian.
2006-11-14 12:22:09 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some people would say that annoying someone who's made it clear he doesn't want your help is being a jerk.
2006-11-14 12:08:20 · answer #5 · answered by Nomadd 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋