I'm involved in one with a married woman. We've been friends since long, had sex some days ago. She's ALOT worried and confused unnecessarily.
Need your positive advise to continue it without letting her feel guilty and keeping everything smooth and secret.
Have you ever been involved in one?
What should I tell to relieve her tension and keep her comfortable?
2006-11-14 05:54:44 · 20 answers · asked by DTA 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Feeling like crap is one of the consequences lying cheaters face. Sorry, but feeling guilty, worried and confused is what she deserves.
2006-11-14 05:57:32 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
No, thankfully I haven't. There's nothing out there better than what I've already got at home.
You, on the other hand, are selfish. You are taking advantage of the fact that she is "confused". If you were really her "friend", you would be putting her needs above your own.
Anytime a married partner looks "outside" their marriage to solve problems they are having, it is a huge mistake. It is wrong and it "never" solves anything. The only thing you are doing is satisfying your own needs. You are making her "bad" situation worse and there is nothing "positive" about your intentions.
The fact that she is already "worried" and feeling "guilty" should tell you that this isn't right for her. If you had any feelings for her you would realize that and stop thinking of yourself.
I'd hardly call her worry and confusion "unnecessary"! This is a dangerous game you are playing. If her husband is like most of the "men" I know, you are the one who should be "worried"!
2006-11-14 07:02:53 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Here...print her out this list i made of all the awesome reasons to sleep with someone else while you're married..it should help put her mind at ease!!
1. It makes her a cheater.
2. And a Wh0re.
3. She gets the opportunity to destroy her husband & children (if she has any) when they find out that mommy's a cheater. And that you're a man-wh0re.
4. She feels like a guilty hooker...because she's acting like one.
5. She can feel good every day about HERSELF...knowing what a person of great morals she is...
6. If they divorce and you end up in a "real' relationship with her, she wont EVER cheat on you. Really! because, "you're different"...and you obviously wouldn't cheat on her..because you are a man of SUCH good character....
Blah.
Blah.
Blah.
SO...Hope that helps her out!! =)
2006-11-14 06:10:45 · answer #3 · answered by Shakira 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
ok. been friends for long time? won't be once it ends. I will try to give you some positive input. You hve the opportunity to do something RIGHT out of something so hurtful. Although it will be hard....... try to let go. i am going to tell u something, she will have SEX with her husband, she will choose her kids if any... and she will not put you first in her life. You will only destroy a friend whom you should care about. She will later resent you and you will feel like sh*t. Lets just say--- it works out-w/u She will eventually cheat on you also. If you can cheat on your spouse who knows and loves you dearly. you can cheat on someone
who means less to her. It 's a no win situation. Sorry. remember when you have a daughter later in life...... you'll know when she's being cheated on .
2006-11-14 06:19:42 · answer #4 · answered by chitchat 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There's nothing you can say to her to make her feel better about cheating and breaking her marriage vows. You should both look seriously at the situation and realize that it's not a good thing. If she's unhappy, let her divorce her husband and then start a relationship with you. The only thing you're doing now is playing with fire.
2006-11-14 05:58:23 · answer #5 · answered by wish2bwriter 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her what she wants to hear, that it's not about who she'll hurt by doing this. As long as she is happy & being satisfied that should be all that matters. Let her know what a good man that you are for being there for her in her time of need, and that everything will be alright just as long as you two are able to keep your affair a secret.
2006-11-14 06:50:06 · answer #6 · answered by WhyNotMe 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I don't get it.I just don't get it.You need help.See a therapist.This is wrong. Can't you see,you're going to end up hurting so many people, and you just don't seem to care!! "continue it without letting her feel guilty and keeping everything smooth and secret. "
Smooth and secret? You just think you're on to a good thing, don't you?
But, you're NOT.I just hope there arent any kids involved.
2006-11-14 05:59:31 · answer #7 · answered by Sunrise 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you care for her it's simple, stop seeing her, I mean obviously the affair is taking it's toll and if you care you will step aside, I am not too keen on extra marital affairs I am against it, I mean she's some mans wife, how would youlike that done to you? I am not going to candy coat it, it's wrong at least in my eyes.
2006-11-14 05:58:41 · answer #8 · answered by nissdonna 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The thing you can do to help her is leave her alone.
You are now a complication to her life.
Leave this woman alone.
She has realized her mistake and wants away from you.
I can't blame her. Now do the right thing and respect her wish to break it off.
You are beginning to sound like a stalker.
If you cannot leave her alone please tell her husband so he can give you the beating you so badly deserve.
2006-11-14 06:02:47 · answer #9 · answered by Flagger 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She is married and should be worried as it is cheating. I have more respect for myself then to be in this situation. You cannot do anything to ease her tension as she is guilty and knows it.
2006-11-14 06:22:23 · answer #10 · answered by mayihelpyou 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋