What advice would you give a pregnant woman, for preparation for the birth?

Question

My friend is pregnant, and we are living in a country where antenatal classes are very hard to find, and prohibitively expensive. (We're in a West African country, and my friend asked me for advice.) Never having been pregnant myself, I thought I'd ask on Answers for tips. The only thing I could offer her was what my mother taught me, breathing exercises. Breathe in deep through the nose, breath out deep through the mouth. Any other ideas? Thanks.

we are in the Gambia.

Drugs... not reliable here, unlike in the West. Most babies are born at home.

Answer 1

I never went to any classes, because although a lot of women I am sure would find them useful, when it comes to labour and nature does as intended, all the techniques (breathing and what not), would either come naturally or you would have forgotten/ not practical in different scenarios. I am glad I did not go to the classes. I watched the breathing techniques on different TV programmes and read about them in the magazines, but when it came to the actual birth, I found the deep breathing (as it is recommended) NO good at all. It made me dizzy. I found breathing slowly and quietly a lot more contented and made the pain more bearable and controled. I was on my own for hours (through my own choice, didn't want my husband to see me in pain), but the last 4 hours or so of my labour was accompanied by my mum who found herself in the situation (poor woman) because one of the midwives examined me wrongly and announced that the birth was 'imminent'. So my mum thought she'd come in and greet the baby, instead the baby had another few hours to go before making an appearance. Her support however at the toughest time was invaluable. I would recommend a female in there with your friend as somebody to talk to. My midwife (bless her soul, I know she meant well), but was patronising and wanted me to have gas and air which made me sick, and I had to tell her to back off! I had one bit of pain relief, no epidural, so it was pretty much all natural. So in addition to a female companion, tell your friend to try and keep calm and have belief that she CAN give birth. It is hard work, but I'd do it all over again. Good luck.

Answer 2

sorry for sounding crude (and rude) with my answer but i wish I'd been told this sooner!! I had to have an episiotomy with my son and as a result i had an infection and my nether regions have never been the same since. I was advised AFTER the birth that you should try to stretch you vagina as much as possible before the birth. Apparently, fisting is the best way to achieve the right amount of stretch needed but you should also try different size "toys" and try bigger ones each month.

Also, during labour, i found pacing up and down the ward helped, as did kneeling on all fours on a oile of cushions while my hubby rubbed my back.

Answer 3

I didn't attend any antenatal classes, so I shall tell you that my best idea was to just focus on breathing. Tell her not to focus on the pain, just breathe though each contraction- make the breaths slow and deliberate- and the centre of her attention.
I know that I did have some gas and air, but most of the day was spent just breathing deeply without having any pain relief.
My other advice is to just listen to her body. She will know when she needs to start pushing, because her body will automatically start doing what it needs to to get the baby out.

So, odd as it seems, without pain relief, the only way to get through it is to stay calm, relaxed and focused on the breathing, not the pain. It does hurt, but it is bearable, and she will get through it.

Congratulations and good luck to your friend.

Answer 4

I don't know what the country you are in is like but if at all possible don't say no to drugs. It will not affect the baby and will make your labor 1000 times easier. With my son I got medicine 30 minutes after they broke my water. and that was probably the easiest birth ever. When I was dialated to a ten I pushed once or twice and he flew out. He was a big baby too, 9 lbs 4 oz.

Answer 5

My first pregnancy was with twins... I had no antenatal classes whatsoever. That's the good thing about babies, they're going to come out whatever happens, you don't need a class to give birth.

Breathing is important, but it will all be apparent what's required once in labour. Maybe you could buy her a book on relaxation techniques for in between contractions.

Answer 6

I've had 4 kids, and the only advice that I can give is nothing. It is going to hurt, and it's not going to be fun, and you're going to yell at people, and you're going to want to punch the person telling you to breath, breathe, breathe... but in the end, she's going to have a beautiful little baby. Don't prepare so much for the actual birth, prepare for the baby when he/she comes. That's what's going to matter more than knowing how to breathe.

Answer 7

The best thing to remember with the breathing is to concentrate on it. The worse thing to do when in pain is to tense up, which is a natural reaction.

When I went to Antenatal classes they did not teach breathing, as you will forget it when the time comes, but i do remember them saying about not tensing up.

Answer 8

Breathing is the best way to deal with the pain and to try and relax, she should go with whatever feels most comfortable for her. Whether that is standing,on her back etc.

It really is very different for everyone, music, candles whatever normally relaxes her. Hot bath is always nice but this will slow down labour.

Answer 9

I bought a video online and watched it with my husband throughout the pregnancy. We worked odd hours, lived in a small town, and my husband has two other kids, so attending prenatal classes was impossible. The DVD really helped me prepare for everything during the pregnancy and at birth. good luck

Answer 10

Just relax. I have had 2 kids and labor was different. I suggest to drink lots of water. Don't be scared. Just relax. Good Luck