everyone says you are born either straight, bi, or gay and that it does not change.. but then why once some women get divorced from a man they go and get with another lady. what happened to their sexuality not being able to change?..
2006-11-14 04:57:04 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Because it is not ingrained into our genetics is why. Sexuality is a choice, always is and always will be. We choose who we are attracted to and then we act on that choice.
I don't buy that people are born one sexual orientation or another. It is socially learned just like gender is.
2006-11-14 05:09:38 · answer #1 · answered by newcovenant0 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Many of those individuals are hurt by the other gender for whatever reasons and think they're all the same. They don't realize that there are both good and bad ones in either gender. Personality, interest and communication are unique in every person and gender is rarely the true issue.
To change to bi or gay after being straight is an easy way out and opens up more different individuals without searching a lot (there are so many willing). I believe that if these individual really tried to weed out the good ones from the bad ones and not give their hearts out before finding the right one, they would find no reason to turn towards the same gender. People today, are just plain lazy and opt for the fastest easiest route.
2006-11-14 13:34:31 · answer #2 · answered by trojan 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I certainly believe that sexuality can change. What you just described often happens as evidence of it, as well as sometimes out-and-out lesbians suddenly lose all attraction to women and find themselves, crazily enough, straight. It's not common, but it happens enough to disprove the born-that-way theory (at least for me).
It's also very possible that the woman you described is truly bisexual (but you never knew) so that the divorce and subsequent relationship just made it seem like her sexuality changed. Or she might have been 'lying to herself' throughout the marriage and finally had the guts to be the lesbian she truly was. Or she might not have been lying to herself, truly loved and desired her husband, and then sort of realized her sexuality later in life, as often happens. Or, there might not have been any sexuality component in either relationship- rather, she was in love with her husband, and things fell apart/she fell out of love with him, and the next person she fell in love with was a woman- the whole 'love is gender-blind' concept.
Whatever it may be, it could be any of them.
2006-11-14 15:22:11 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I never heard that it doesn't change. Why would it not change. We as people continue to change. You are not the same person at 18 years as you are at 40 years. I have seen the straight, bi, gay thing change in many people over the course of their lifetime. But just because that is what one person experiences does not mean all people have to experience the same thing.
2006-11-14 13:27:28 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let me answer this for you! I am a divorced woman. I lived the hetero life a long time. When I was in college I dated a girl for about a year. I was so in love with her and so happy but in major, major denial. Now that I'm with my current girlfriend...who came after a failed marriage...I see the signs all the way back to childhood from me making out with the neighborhood girls to it always being Barbie and Barbie and never Barbie and Ken!!! I think it was there all along but I was raised in a conservative home and never really gave a thought to it other than that I was never happy with a man!
2006-11-14 16:31:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well what has happened is they are 'pretending' to be straight so that they do not 'hurt' the people they love, they are trying to fit into the roles people expect of them. It is a very hard life and can end up hurting a lot of people. When they 'come out' they are normally happier and feel much better. It isn't that we cannot 'act' like we are straight - but the questions is why shoudl we have to? Why pretned to be something just to make everyone else happy but yourself?
2006-11-14 13:40:12 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Gender attraction (orientation) falls along a continuum. Many are either straight (at one end) or Gay/Lesbian (at the other). Quite a few fall in the middle.
However, this is only attraction. Social pressures, which can be intense if you are not in the majority or if your group is hated, can pressure you into choosing someone who you aren't as attracted to.
Who you sleep with doesn't define your orientation. Who you are attracted to does.
2006-11-14 13:10:26 · answer #7 · answered by Radagast97 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being Gay does not mean that you can't be with the opposite sex. many do so simply because they think that's what is expected of them. The sad thing is so many of those "forced" relationships end because the person cannot live a lie any longer and their "partner" suffers because of it as well. That is one of the reasons so many of us speak up to tell others it's OK to be yourself and not to worry what those who speak against you have to say.
2006-11-14 13:05:45 · answer #8 · answered by IndyT- For Da Ben Dan 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Some people try to act as they feel society expects them to. After finding they cannot change, they go the way they were meant to go........the way to be happy.
2006-11-14 13:33:56 · answer #9 · answered by Shossi 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
people who do that made a mistake in the first place and are trying to correct it. Usually because they were in denial in the beginning.
2006-11-14 13:10:36 · answer #10 · answered by I know, I know!!!! 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋