i wrote it when i was upset about breaking up with this girl, its a lil corny i guess, but it was how i felt at the time, tell me what you think;
the movement of my heart is so delicate
so much it feels every kind of pain
it feels you when you are around
and even when you are in vain
my heart plays percussion
when ever you are with me
the feeling is so personal
i only wish that you would see
when you are not present
my heart's beating for you
but i always think positive
because soon i will get to see you
my heart knows too well
the one girl who is meant to be
but my heart also knows too well
that my heart is part of me
my heart knows that I
will never be able to be
everything you want me
inside and outside to be
my heart feels the pain
when i know i cannot be with you
for my heart knows for sure that
us to be together is far due
i spend all my nights alone
mostly thinking of you and me
and how us being together
is never going to be.
for kate
2006-11-14 03:34:04 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
It's beautiful!!!!
2006-11-14 03:58:01 · answer #1 · answered by Urchin 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi I write a lot of poems and from what I read it comes from your heart although it is a sad one, I saw many mistakes in the poem, in many of your verses you had the same word to rhyme twice, other than that it sounded pretty good, do some extra work on the same words rhyming,.and you got a winner....Good Luck
2006-11-14 12:47:07 · answer #2 · answered by barbie_booboo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you are still in mad love with kate but there is something stopping you from telling her how you feel instead of telling me. get over the stero type and grab your sack and get your women back. every one has pride but just because you broke up with her dosent mean you cant say to her that you made a misstake.
2006-11-14 11:47:57 · answer #3 · answered by Mrs W. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nice I like the feeling, she might like it too if you ever feel like reading it to her you should read it not expecting anything so your feelings won't be as hurt if she doesn't like it couldn't hurt to pre warn her about it though it's all up to you
2006-11-14 11:48:37 · answer #4 · answered by Nunya 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is a very beautiful poem...you should read it to kate!!!
2006-11-14 11:36:43 · answer #5 · answered by Veronica 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is great. Read it to her or send it to her man. She will like it .
2006-11-14 12:13:16 · answer #6 · answered by golden rider 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's quite good...Very heartfelt.
2006-11-14 11:50:31 · answer #7 · answered by Miss J 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
fabulous......................................]
INCREDIBLE
2006-11-14 11:37:48 · answer #8 · answered by vinni 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋