I've noticed this every morning on my way to work...Why?

Question

Every morning, when choosing to sit on the train, I've noticed people commonly sit at diagonals to each other rather than next to or directly opposite someone else. Are we instinctly, opposed to eye-contact or contact of any other kind? Would we prefer no one to sit around us at all?

Answer 1

holy crap, i dont like when someone is watching me or trying to catch my eye too often.
especially in the morning i need space and i want to be alone or just, you know, till i kind of wake up.

Answer 2

You are right - and if there is room I tend to do the same - either with a close friend or just a formal acquantance.

Sitting side by side is awkward for conversation and you are more cramped than you need be.

Sitting directly opposite each other always feel a bit "confrontational" to me - sort of "head-2-head".

Sitting on the diagonal gives more room, is easy for conversation and allows full use of the table too.

I am now going to say something which I **REALLY HOPE** will NOT be taken the wrong way, there is ZERO offence intended but.....

I am wondering if the reason you are suprirsed is because, going from your avatar, you are a different race. Different races often have different "social spaces", "intimate spaces" and so on. I have noticed on holiday that some cultures find it very easy to be so close to a stranger as to be almost touching - yet elsewhere a distance of at least a metre is needed to avoid people feeling "hemmed in" - or threatened.

Do you perhaps feel comfortable with people being VERY near to you - even if you don't know them overly well?

Answer 3

This is very true. I notice this too. What I also notice is even though we rarely make eye contact, we do sneak a peek at the other person when they're not looking (especially if the train goes through a tunnel and the windows act as mirrors). Next time you're on the tube you'll notice people look everywhere but each other - being from the Sussex coast where people are a bit more friendly I like to smile at someone on the tube to see their reaction - 9 times out of 10 they look at you as if you're a total psychopath.

Answer 4

I take the train every day to work and prefer to sit where there is no one opposite me and the reason I do that is because I can have all the leg room to myself until the train starts to really become full.

I don't really mind whoever sits next to me or opposite me, but having space to stretch my legs is a bonus in the morning as I have a one hour journey into work.

Answer 5

because to sit opposite or next to someone on a train or bus for that matter when there are pleanty of other seats available encrouches on others people's space. Just imagine if you were the only person on the carraige and someone got on and sat next to you how uncomfortable would you feel? So there you go there is your answer.

Answer 6

I think its human instinct that we know there is this 'private & invisible' space around us that we are entitled to. Its like when you get into an empty elevator, the next person who walks in will automatically stand as far away from you as possible. We instinctly respect this private space of others :-)

Answer 7

I DO agree with the previous answers and your observations, however,
You may have posed an interesting but bogus question. Try changing geography. As OBSERVANT and bright as you are, you will notice how people in smaller cities and towns make eye contact ,smile, and readily converse with one another. We have f-u-n y'all. But you guys are right if there's too many strangers! People open up easier out West and in the South and rural areas.

Answer 8

Don't like people sitting next to me because people smell (deodorant, perfume, etc gives me some sort of heartburn) and I suppose people like a bit of space on overcrowded public transport.
Given the choice I would have no one sitting next to me except for amorous reasons or frostbite.

Answer 9

i work in bingo, and customers would rather sit by theirselves rather than on the same table. I have groups of friends spread out over 6 tables some days!! i think its just human nature and the general wariness of strangers, although I think it can differ in various parts of the country.

Answer 10

The one other thing you need to think about is legs!
I have quite long legs, and so would prefer not to sit opposite someone so that I can stretch out my legs, or have space to fit my bag on the floor behind my legs.

Answer 11

People just are not comfortable with strangers. Perhaps people are afraid, not knowing who that other person is, how they act. Recently, i started to think, if only everyone is friendly and open to everyone else. How nice it would be! But in reality, some people think such behaviour is "random" and out of the "norm". Basically, it's out of the "norm". Haven't we been raised with "don't talk to strangers"?