When some kids parents can't afford to buy them a lot of presents? And they see other kids getting more stuff, regardless of how good or bad either behaves. Isn't this sending the wrong message?
2006-11-13 21:22:48 · 27 answers · asked by - 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Holidays ➔ Christmas
Fugazi, you're right, I don't have any kids myself!
Siany, I totally agree that it's a good lesson to put out there that people need to be rewarded for their work. But it's not actually working like that, because it's still based on what their parents buy. When the kids think it's from "Santa", money wouldn't come into it, they should all be getting exactly what they deserve. And obviously this isn't what they're seeing when they start comparing who got what with their friends, so how's that going to make the less well-off or spoiled kids feel?
2006-11-13 21:39:21 · update #1
Regardless of the family income, if a child is brought up knowing the values of that family then things fit into place for that child in that particular circumstance. As a parent, then I have no qualms about using bad behaviour as a threat and I will continue to do so! I can't think of one parent who hasn't used it!
My parents weren't well off and we never had the elaborate presents some of my friend's got but I never thought they had been better than me. I was brought up to be grateful for what Santa came with regardless.(and obviously that extended to birthdays etc) Now,as a parent (who can afford more than my parents could), I hope to bring my children up with the same attitude of gratitude and knowing more isn't always better. With my children I limit them to ask Santa for 4 things so they think long and hard about what they really do want. I have told them if they're not greedy about their list then Santa might come with a surprise as well. It works well and I look forward to their extra excitement every year when they find something that is a complete surprise to them. One of my boy's friends was reeling off all the things she was 'getting' and it was a ridiculous length of a list. That isn't rewarding good behaviour - it's just spoiling the child which will bring its own problems in later life. Santa should be seen as someone that has the potential to bring toys the kids would like - not as someone that HAS to.
It all comes back to effective parenting! (Purely personal opinion!)
2006-11-13 21:42:27 · answer #1 · answered by wee stoater 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that its as simple as how much you can afford, we are talking about kids under the age of 6 or 7, and about the perception that they have. When my son was a believer (many years ago now!!) I didn't have much money, but the excitement that he was going to get something from Santa, and the joy when he found the presents under the tree, even the fact that there was lots of bright wrapping paper, and the tree was so exciting, but the best part for us, as a family was that the Christmas break gave us time together to be a family, and that was the part that he and I look back on now with nostalgia, not the computer games or the toys. I don't think that its a bad thing for kids to understand that they have to behave properly if they are going to get what they want.
Happy Christmas
2006-11-15 09:18:56 · answer #2 · answered by deee999 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i was only saying the other day, that there are so many different santa clause/father christmas stories, We always had a big pillowcase of presents that were from Santa on Christmas Day and then on Boxing day we had more presents that were from family and friends, but i know a lot of people tell their kids that they send the money up to santa and he buys all the presents, i dont like this idea as they will never know who to thank for their presents and often wonder why aunty or grandma doesnt buy them gifts. My kids think Santa buys theirs presents and why i always say i havent got any money near to christmas is because i have to buy other family and friends presents and all the extra nice food we have. It is very hard though knowing what to say, my 2 children 9 and 7 are beginning to doubt a little but there is still a little bit of hope that there is a santa still, i think there is nothing better than the look on their faces when they come down in the morning and see a pile of presents there for them. My children arnt spoilt all year round, they do get treats but not loads, and i think it is a great time to treat them and show them how special they are to you. My mum was a single parent and she always managed to get us a pillow case of presents, they might not have been the biggest and most expensive toys around, but we never went without, and loved our stockings which included the orange and nuts and new toothbrush and toothpaste, always a new colouring book and pens, i have carried on this tradition with my 2 children, and asked them whether they would like to come down to one big expensive present or lots of little bits and pieces, and they both said the little bits and pieces!! I think aslong as you teach your children the value of money and how hard it is to save money up for things then no matter how much or how little they get they will be really pleased. I just hope that Santa lives on in my house for another year at least.
2006-11-14 08:29:26 · answer #3 · answered by happy go lucky 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't care about the message, but for those who don't have much money they can still use the message if they like it, because kids who believe in Santa don't look at the cost of their gifts theyl ook more at the number of their gifts or the size of the packaging. My son's face way lit up when he got the happy meal toys I'de secretly been collecting from Santa. He also is as happy with a store bought toy as with a cereal box gift. For most kids it's just about getting something new 'cause no matter how wonderful their possesions are after a while they get bored and want something new. Dollar store toys are also great.
2006-11-14 07:35:12 · answer #4 · answered by tyreanpurple 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Dear questioner, interesting dilemma, I think there is good and bad in all of us, will the hangman for Saddam not deserve a wee pressie?
I find setting a good example a milestone to measure a childs goodness of badness, so over to you
By the way, the tooth fairy and I were talking with the easter bunny last night - he is up here in Lapland on a holiday from making his chocolates eggs - that will be in the shops on the 26th Dec 2006 and the tooth fairy has agreed on a handsome 10% commisiion - to Bunny and I - on all chocolate related dental extractions that our products provide him
Regards and xmas hugs and kisses xxxx see ya soon
S Claus
2006-11-14 05:37:44 · answer #5 · answered by JAYFIRE 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i'm sure there were kids who got more loot than we did , but i don't remember ever noticing that as a kid...
i don't have kids yet, but my husband and i have talked about the santa thing, and we both agree that lying to children like that isn't a good idea...
i remember crying my eyes out when i was a kid and found out santa wasn't real...and all my friends have similar recollections of it being a "trauma".....why would you do that to your kids?.....i think i would handle it by still doing the santa thing, just letting the kids know santa was more of a story than a real person
2006-11-14 11:19:59 · answer #6 · answered by SNAP! 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The words SANTA CLAUSE came from Saint Nicholas. In the old christian calander this day was observed on December the Eights. Christmas is a day to observe and remember the birth of Christ. this is observed on the 25th. day of December. The two should not be joined. The union was made to facilitate the money hungry merchandizers. If Santa wants to bring gifts to children, than it should happen on a day other than December 25th.
2006-11-14 05:35:28 · answer #7 · answered by leskinglew 1 · 1⤊ 2⤋
perhaps the message should be about giving.
it is amazing how excited children who have not yet lost their puirty/innocence/whatever you want to call it - are to have a secret gift they are working on. The joy of watching a child who has made - not bought, but actually put some of themselves into - a gift for someone they care about and the excitement they feel - cannot be matched. Perhaps there is a Santa Claus - it would take a real one to teach this message.
ps - please forgive convoluted grammar
2006-11-14 05:27:04 · answer #8 · answered by Ruthie Baby 6 · 3⤊ 2⤋
Wee Stoater has a excellent view of raising children. I agree wholeheartedly. As parents we have to set the boundaries - its part of teaching our children right from wrong. Gives them values.
2006-11-14 09:15:47 · answer #9 · answered by HereweGO 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
wow youre right. but when i was a kid it wasnt about how many presnents santa brought me it was about watching christmas specials on tv and seeing my out of town family. but yes i have alwyas felt sorry for the less fortunate children.
2006-11-14 10:07:51 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋