I am going to leave my abusive husband of 8 years( together for 12) by this weekend. I know that it's now or never. I want to take some things with me like my kid's bed and dressers, our clothes, washing machine and big screen tv. I was going to leave the livingroom furniture, deep freezer and all of his collectibles( sports figurines, cars etc). We live in Michigan. I'm just wondering should I just take what I can and get the hell out of dodge or what? I'm also considering a personal protection order. I am really nervous as I don't have a job right now. My kids and I are going over to my mom's to live while I get on my feet. My mom is great and says she'll provide for us while I get on my feet.I am not a deadbeat, I worked and paid bills ( even though he 's told everyone that I didn't do **** but lay on my *** which is a total lie). I was laid off. I'm wondering what I may be entiltled to take with me? Our house is in foreclosure so that's not an option to stay anyway & I fear him.
2006-11-13 19:02:43 · 13 answers · asked by Veronique 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Take what you purchased yourself, or what he doesn't want.
Most of all, you're taking something no one can take away from you -- your dignity!
2006-11-13 19:05:28 · answer #1 · answered by tylersf 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm from Michigan as well. First go to your local police and explain what you intend to do and ask for a officer to stand by while you gather your things. The police officer will insure that your leaving will be peaceful and safe for you and your children. Take what is rightfully yours, and make a list of those things that are in dispute. DO NOT INFORM HIM WHERE YOU ARE GOING!!!!!!!!!!!!! Next, get yourself a attorney right away and file for divorce and a P.P.O. I'm sure that your parents will help you with this. If not, there are women's resource centers who will help you with the this.
In Michigan as in most states, women are given a larger portion of the "benefit of the doubt", especially where children are involved.
Then get yourself into counseling for to help you get over the abuse that you have had to endure.
Things will be a little rough for you and your children for a while, but it will be much better than what you are living right now.
I feel bad for you having to endure this treatment, but I'm quite sure that you are a strong person and will come out of this a better person. Keep your spirits up!!
2006-11-13 19:20:14 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
HONESTLY? get your clothes and the kids clothes,,anything you can carry and GO!!!! stuff the washer,the beds,everything else as it may just serve to cause more conflict,,these things can be replaced,,fear is a good way to control and if you leave him nothing to bargain with it takes some of the control away from him,,he hasnt won anything,,he can look around at the home,,See nothing is gone and then what,,he may shout and play up but at least not about what you have taken from him,,its just stuff and you have a good support network,,use it,,and their washing machine,,,the peace of mind knowing you need him for absolutely nothing is better than him always having that hold of you,,you would be entitled to all the kids stuff,,the washer,,clothes,,money but,,,is what could follow really worth it when you can snub your nose at him and say,," keep it all ,i need nothing now from you!!" literally wipe the slate clean and he cannot even go to court and show you tried to rip him off and it will also show how quickly you needed to leave.
2006-11-13 19:11:37 · answer #3 · answered by lex 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he is as abusive as you say he is then I would try and take your clothes and the children's clothes. I would leave and as quick as you can get a order of protection for yourself and your children so he may no get near you. I would let the courts do their job and you would be able to get the things that you need so that way it is all legal and above board. Please get out of this as soon as you can because you never know what may happen if he is that unstable. God Bless and good luck.
2006-11-13 19:11:31 · answer #4 · answered by lonehermit2000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Number 1 # make sure you list what you take , give it to legal representative asap, trust me , been there done that, Number 2 , as per someone elses answer, do it while his not there, but let him know as soon as poss after its done, Number 3 what you cant take , list & if poss write down sereal numbers , this will be very emotional , but will save a lot of legals down the track , i did this when separating from my wife ( very spiteful person) and saved a lot of dramas ,take care
2006-11-13 19:30:21 · answer #5 · answered by bellsby3 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take what you want and get a protection/restraining order for your children and self. You are his wife and what is his is yours and vice versa. And when you devorce the sorry sack of S***, if you have pictures, police reports, etc.. to show the judge that he is abusive ask that your children also be protected from being near him.
2006-11-13 19:08:19 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
remember to photograph ever thing as prof of what was left and what you took, your going to have someone trying to fight you to get everything he can and the photos will help, stop thinking of the big stiff like the TV and washer, get what you need like kids beds and clothing etc. you may ask for the other items in court later. be safe and keep moving forward. good luck.
2006-11-13 19:36:18 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What ever you need to live. and 1/2 of all the general goods, in monetary value, including cars, ect. you had better get a protective order.
2006-11-13 19:11:11 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you are going to do it while he is at work then grab whatever will fit into the truck.....
if he is going to be around then just take what you can and go.......you dont need a big scene infront of the kids......
good for you for leaving his sorry *** i wish you all the best in the bright future you have ahead of you......
2006-11-13 19:06:22 · answer #9 · answered by askaway 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just get yourself and your kids out safely while he's at work. the rest is all material stuff you can do with out it . and if you must have it you can decide that with the lawyers. your safety and the children come first.
goodluck.
2006-11-13 20:08:28 · answer #10 · answered by For ever in my Heart 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What am I entitled to take with me when I leave abusive husband.....bad memories
2006-11-13 19:15:54 · answer #11 · answered by siddharthmalhotra2001 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋