My mother in law came over my house being sarcastic and disrespectful. I told him about the incident when he got home from work, he agreed she was totally out of line. Now he's saying it dont bother him.
2006-11-13 16:36:05 · 6 answers · asked by Got Curves? 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I'm not saying I want him to confront her about it, what I'm saying is shouldnt he be bothered by the fact that she disrespects me and it bothers me.
2006-11-13 19:21:24 · update #1
When you tell a man a problem he feels he has to solve it (it is a man thing) in this case he knows he can't fix the problem (how can he go up against his own mom) so he simply disengages himself from the problem.
This woman is not going to go away and she doesn't seem the time to respect boundaries (she did this in your own home!!!) so now you are the one who has to use your wits to deal with the overbearing broad. I hope you have a degree in psychology.
2006-11-13 16:42:23 · answer #1 · answered by lily 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie, your husband agreed wtih you that his mother was totally out of line, what more do you want? If you are expecting him to call his mother on it and demand an apology, you aren't going to get it...I'm sorry, but it would have happened already. He's leaving this for you to deal with. He sounds like a "yes, maam" kinda guy. Which means that he's going to try to keep the peace by agreeing with you but not taking a stand against dear old mom. You may just be making a big deal out of nothing, or you may just be expecting him to deal with this situation for you. I hate to say this, but if you want her to stop this behavior, you are going to have to take a stand against her sarcasm. Either beat her at her own game, or simply sit down and have a heart to heart and tell her how it made you feel. She may not even realize she did anything wrong. (as hard as that is to believe...you'd be surprised how frequently that happens). Call your mother in law, have the talk and judge her response. If she apologizes...great..then she's going to start watching her P's and Q's when you are around. If she gets defensive, then get a game plan together and put her back in her place.
2006-11-14 00:44:33 · answer #2 · answered by Hollynfaith 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He should be concerned but not to the point where it would bother him the same way it bothers you. The issues you have with your in law weighs heavier on you than it does to him and that is what he meant by "it doesn't bother me".
Now remember, this is also your house and you have the right to take care of this matter yourself. If you think she was being disrespectful while under your roof, set her straight. Don't wait for your husband to do it.
2006-11-14 00:45:30 · answer #3 · answered by jdhs 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When me and my husband first got married for the first year I had the same problem everytime me and his mother met. Then after a while of telling him and him not doing nothing I said someting to her. He wasnt to pleased but after a while he came around and told her to knock it off( not nicely though) then he stopped talking to her for a month and she stopped trying to ruin us. Do whatever works for you,But I would be furious. let him know how much it bothered you and if he wont do nothing do it yourself.
2006-11-14 00:42:12 · answer #4 · answered by hotlips1082 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're looking for him to be an ally with you against his mother, you're gonna lose. Right or wrong, no man wants to choose sides in an argument between his mother and his wife,... its a no-win situation. My advice,.... handle disputes with your mother in law on you're own, without dragging your husband into it. She'll have greater respect for your ability to stand up to her on your own,...even if she doesn't like it, and so will he.
2006-11-14 01:10:32 · answer #5 · answered by just_me3575 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
arent men aloud to speak up once in awhile..get over it....but next time she comes over tell her you are leaving for the day and go
2006-11-14 00:40:43 · answer #6 · answered by acierman2006 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋