Im 20 and hes in the military and deployments are hard. I love him more then anything, and want to spend the rest of my life with him. WHAT TO DO?
2006-11-13 12:34:07 · 24 answers · asked by Aphrodite 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
thanks for all the answers! wow!
2006-11-13 12:45:33 · update #1
I think that you should get married if you really love him and you want to be with him for the rest of your life and the military life is hard but if your strong enough you can get through it. I'm 20 too and I'm married to someone in the military and it did not matter that I was only 19 when I got married. I know who I wanted to be with it and there was no point in me waiting until I was older.
2006-11-13 13:52:48 · answer #1 · answered by Nicalo22 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was 20 when I got married, and IF I had it to do over, I would have dated more-------but, that's just me!
It's more tough for you being your Fiance is in the Military because you will have that time apart on his Deployments. Only you know if you can handle that.
I think you should hold off on marriage awhile, because you have a doubt by just asking on here, and it shows you aren't sure either.
I'd say, don't rush into marriage. First see if he could ever get Shore duty, and if so, your relationship would be more stable that way, because he wouldn't have to leave for months on end! Marriage is serious so make sure before you go there, ok?
Best Wishes.
2006-11-13 20:46:49 · answer #2 · answered by julesrules 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should wait a little longer. It does sound as if you are a bit young. I mean it sounds like he's still got career stuff he's working on. What's the rush? If you are happy with the way things are going, then keep it that way until you are both ready to settle down. That's what marriage is for. I have been with my boyfriend for over 2 and a half years, but I still have a career to start and he still has one more semester of college. We aren't living near each other and long distance can be hard sometimes, but if you both have a good base on your relationship and have been able to establish things before you have been separated a lot, then things will be just fine, as long as it's not long-term long distance. Cause then the trouble comes in. But me and my boyfriend will be living together within 6 months! We know our love is strong enough to wait til' we can both settle. We are very happy together and realize that marriage is certainly in our futures together, but there's no rush at all :).
2006-11-13 20:41:00 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
do what you need to make you happy... though, you look like a pretty, young lady... you should spend a few years making huge mistakes with old man-whores like me.... but in actuality, get engaged first and then continue with school or whatever path you are on... if the love is truly there, it will be there a day from now, a month, a year, a lifetime... a few of my friends have hastened into committed relationships with military people and it hasn't worked out quite as well because they were just trying to keep someone close to them and then when they were released from the service, their attitude changed.... be careful... protect your heart... and love completely when you do choose to give your heart... for only then will you be able to overcome all the obstacles that stand in your way.
2006-11-13 20:40:33 · answer #4 · answered by nimkiw 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
DON'T DO IT!! I grew up near a base and many of my friends married their boyfriends right out of high school. All but one of the marriages ended in divorce, because the wife was at home married but feeling single, and the husband was out and about, once again married but feeling single, and both would end up cheating. You have your whole life to get married, wait until you've had more life experience and definitely wait until your boyfriend is in a position that he can bring you with him in his deployments. The urge to get married is a reaction to the new environment and the loneliness.
2006-11-13 20:39:17 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your in college, i would finish that up. After college, get a job, then it's your decision at that time if you want to spend the rest of your life with the man that you truely love. It's your decision, just make a good choice about what you want to do with the rest of your life.
2006-11-13 20:38:22 · answer #6 · answered by Gaby R 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you marry him dont use his deployment for why the marriage didnt work. Remember this is war time and he could be gone for a longtime. If you love him and he loves you wait until he returns!
2006-11-13 20:41:48 · answer #7 · answered by Markisms 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you can honestly say you'd be strong enough to be supportive of his deployments. Yes. If you're going to one of those whiny wives who ruin their husband's military career,. No. It takes a very special woman to be a military wife.
2006-11-13 20:39:44 · answer #8 · answered by RockwallCat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being a military spouse is hard and requires great determination to your marriage.If you think you can sit and wait go for it! If you think you will be depressed all the time and may cheat or go crazy then don't.
2006-11-13 20:40:03 · answer #9 · answered by lee lee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, if you want to spend the rest of your life with him, and that you're ready for marriage, then by all means you can get married. But marriage is a big committment, you can't have second thoughts about wanting to get married, when you want to get married, you have to know you want to get married.
2006-11-13 20:36:57 · answer #10 · answered by superboredom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋