As mentioned before, I am living with my boyfriend who is separated from his wife. He has said that he wants to work things out with her; doesn't know what to do about us, and he likes having me around.
I know that it's crazy but I can't break away from him. Just when I think about leaving, he says or does something to give me hope. I am currently looking for a new job here. And I have thought about taking a second job for extra money. I cook for him, clean the apartment and am good to him.
Why am I so willing to do so much for him? Why can't I make the choice to go back home to my family? I would rather suffer alone with a chance of being with him,settling for whatever I get; than go home and be surrounded by my family. Why
2006-11-13 09:33:35 · 11 answers · asked by torn 3 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
U said that u r weak to break up with him. But if he gets back with his wife and works it out... what will become with u? You have spent all that time cooking and cleaning for nothing. Instead u should let him know that u truly care for him and want to be friends, but the relationship couldn't work out. Plus, have you had any previous bad relationships with your family? If so, that's probably holding u back from breaking up with ur boyfriend. Don't worry. YOur family is there not to hurt you, but to comfort and help you during difficult times.
2006-11-13 09:46:35 · answer #1 · answered by Band_Geek394 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That guy is keeping you around as a "Maid w/ benefits" Dump him. He obviously doesn't respect you. What do you think he says to his friends about the situation? That he's torn between two women he loves? NOOOO!!! He's saying that he wants to get back together w/ his wife (who probably kicked him out for cheating) but he has a girl that will have sex w/ him & clean his house cook meals.
This guy is a LOSER! Go back to your family that loves you and doesn't use you. Better to do it now, before he dumps you after you have served your purpose to him.
Get out! & Good Luck! (sorry for being so harsh, but sometimes we all need a kick in the butt, including myself!) :)
2006-11-13 18:12:33 · answer #2 · answered by mcmillae 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1) You don't live with a guy who's still married.
2) You certainly don't live with a guy who's married and wants to work things out with his wife.
3) And the kicker is...if the above applies, you sure as hell don't cook and clean for him, just because he "likes having you around".
Sounds to me like you haven't been in too many relationships before. Take it from me...ditch this guy and find someone who will respect and appreciate you. It'll happen. Just give it time.
2006-11-13 17:45:07 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well to put it to you delicately you just don't realize life for you will go on. There is someone out there for everyone. In my opinion you just can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. I would go home and start over again and be near your family. You are weak because you wan Love and going back might mean it is truly over and as far as doing everything for him what about you...you need to feel things to. Sometimes we fall for people who do not treat us well because we feel we do not deserve better...but I am here to tell you that you do....so go home....start over get the attention No respect you deserve.......
2006-11-13 17:41:23 · answer #4 · answered by Jen B 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your question should read, "Why do I have such a low opinion of myself?" That boy you are attached to just
wants free maid service as well as other services. Dump
him and move back to your family right away. Your bf
is a loser as well as a user. You can do better and you deserve better. Hit the door honey and don't let the
doorknob hit you in the butt on your way out. If you
can't find the courage to walk then please seek counseling
to help you find the strength. I'll keep you in my thoughts.
2006-11-13 17:46:38 · answer #5 · answered by Precious Gem 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps you are not satisfied with your family life. Whatever the reason you need to do some living for yourself. I think its wonderful that your so giving to your boyfriend but it sounds like he's walking all over you. You deserve better than that and believe me there is better out there. Don't sell yourself short I am sure you have more to offer than you actually realize.
2006-11-13 17:38:48 · answer #6 · answered by BluLizard 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would take the bold step and pack up - once he sees you are really leaving then he has to choose between you or the wife. Tell him your not coming back tell your see divorce papers. There are plenty a great men out there but we seem to enjoy the bad ones - I've been there. Good luck
2006-11-13 17:38:07 · answer #7 · answered by Lisa B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't wait around. It's obvious he doesn't know what he wants and is taking advantage of you. Don't let that happen. If he really cared about you to any extent he would make a decision for you if he knew you wanted it. Move out and move on. Do the right thing for yourself.
2006-11-13 17:59:58 · answer #8 · answered by U2 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get out of that relationship. Plain and simple. It'll save you a bunch of heartache later on. Good luck with your life.
2006-11-13 17:45:27 · answer #9 · answered by Christopher45 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He will keep saying hopeful things just to keep you around to cater to him. I have lived it. He's no good. Leave him.
2006-11-13 17:53:46 · answer #10 · answered by Black Widow Mollie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋