Would you rather someone you love, like your parent.....?

Question

Would you rather someone you love, like your parent, believe something that is a lie and be happy, or would you rather them know the truth and be less happy?

Answer 1

I'm afraid that you are assuming I can control things that are actually completely out of my power. For example, what someone chooses to believe is quite beyond my control. Another good example of something out of my power is how people feel. I can (maybe) control a small subset of that, which is what I choose to tell them. So allow me to re-phrase your question, if I may:

"Would I rather lie to someone in an attempt to make them happy, or tell them the truth?"

This raises the question of the nature of truth. Will lies REALLY make people happier than truth? I find that to be a slightly dubious proposition. It assumes first of all that I know someone well enough to accurately judge what is better than reality. Worse, it relies on me being able to fake a whole new reality well enough that it is better than the real reality... no small task indeed.

But even if we assume that I can do all this and that the victim of my deception will be happier for it, there are still other consequences involved. The quality which makes one thing the truth and another thing a lie is that the truth works. It can produce results while lies cannot. If a house is built with true engineering, it is a freak if it falls down and kills people. If a house is built with false engineering, it is a freak if it does NOT fall down and kill people. So if I lie and am believed, I have crippled the person who I have lied to - they will not know something about reality. A knowledge I will have stolen from them.

So not only am I bound to manufacture a whole reality and keep it consistent forevermore but even if I completely succeed I will have made the recipient of my lies weaker and less able to survive in the world without my assistance. This, to me, does not sound like an act of love, but rather one of hate.

No. I would not lie to someone I loved. Not if I could possibly help it at all.

Answer 2

I would rather have them know the truth and be less happy because for one you would know that they aren't being lied to while you know the truth...your conscience would eat you alive, and also if they eventually found out the truth later on they might resent you for knowing the whole time and making them out to be the fool. Just all around bad JU JU...

Answer 3

it really depends on the situation. if you KNOW it will hurt the other person AND you tell them your secret just to make yourself feel better, then i think it's better to 'omit the truth'. telling the truth, or better yet confessing to a lie when you're not asked a direct question is usually the result of your own guilty conscience trying to make itself feel better. like, say, you're REALLY physically attracted to someone else, but still in love with your partner. you feel guilty for feeling that way. WHY would you tell?

what it really boils down to is this: if NOT sharing the truth with a loved one would hurt them either way, TELL THE TRUTH. let them prepare for it. and it boils down to you. can you lie with a clear conscience? how do you KNOW they'll be upset with you? the old adage IS true... 'the truth shall set you free' just watch which truths you share and not use a confession simply to make yourself feel better. personally, if it's a BIG issue in my life, and NOT telling the truth would weigh heavy on my mind, it would affect my overall well-being. it's better to tell the truth in most circumstances.

Answer 4

Put yourself in that situation. The truth always comes out, eventually. The truth is real and concrete. Lies are weak and must be reinforced with more lies. Whatever the circumstances are, i believe the truth is the best option.

Answer 5

John 8:32  And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.

Hope this helps.....