My wife and I have been married for 5 years and says that she would like our sex life to be more spontanious. We have two children, at the ages of 5 and 1. I feel that as a responsible adult (Father) that I shouldnt but im losing my wife because of it. I've tried to talk to her about it but she feels as though it is an excuse. I am very attracted to my wife and I love to make LOVE to her, but only when the children are away, outside underadult supervision and or asleep. Am I wrong? What should I do?
2006-11-13 02:59:41 · 15 answers · asked by GeeLew 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think if you are not comfortable with your 5 year old son/daughter walking in while in the act, then you need to say so. Alot of kids have walked in on their parents, and that is one thing that grossly sticks in their memories...many of us adults still remember...yuck! There is a time and place for this, but when there is a chance the kids could walk in, then it should not even be a question. She sounds a bit selfish. If she wants to spice it up, then wait until the kids are asleep and you two can go outside or in the car, or wherever she finds it exciting. So, I do not feel that you are in the wrong on this, I don't agree with it either. Good luck! :)
2006-11-13 03:06:14 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Surprise your wife with a date! Contact a relative/babysitter without her knowing and get them to watch the kids overnight. Then take her out for a romantic dinner followed by an evening at a swank (or even not-so-fancy but clean) hotel. Have an overnight bag hidden in the trunk with fresh clothes and maybe some grown-up toys or movies. Set up a weekend getaway. If she's a stay-at-home mom and your kids are old enough to go to school, then take off work for an afternoon for a tryst while they're off learning.
For that matter, even if you can't manage to get time for any of these (and if you can't, you're working way too hard) then there's things you can do during the times you'd regularly have sex that would spice things up. Try role-playing or a little light bondage, flavored lubes and paints... there's a ton of stuff that can make your sex life more interesting even within your usual time schedule.
Remember, the biggest sex organ in the body is not between your legs, it's between your ears!
2006-11-13 03:22:22 · answer #2 · answered by triviatm 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a responsible father, you should make love to your wife or you may wind up losing her and your children:)
No one is asking you to do it in front of them. A 1 year old can be placed in a crib and a 5 year old can be put in front of a DVD with a sandwich and water.(don't do this often)
Explain to your 5yo that u and mommy will be in the other room for a little bit and if she doesn't disturb you until you come out she will get a nice treat.
Get one of those children monitors with video/sound.
Go to the next room, lock the door and do your duty as a responsible husband. Unless you make love for hours/banging on the walls, it shouldn't be a problem.
Try it and if it doesn't work, you will seem more reasonable to your wife with your "Excuse."
2006-11-13 03:20:10 · answer #3 · answered by stealthisprofile 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Put a monitor in the room with the children so you can hear them. The one year old can be in a playpen and the five year old can be in the same childproof room with the 1 year old. Do not turn on the Television, instead put on some soothing music.
Go into another room and break off a chunk for your wife. As long as you both are close and as long as you keep an ear open. GO FOR IT. Don't deny you wife the service she needs!
2006-11-13 03:20:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can be spontaneous while the children are sleeping what counts here is maybe you being to monotonous.
Plan a weekend away just the two of you. Experiment different things. be naughty !adventure that's what she wants (try buying a woman magazine ) no one needs to know.
2006-11-13 03:05:36 · answer #5 · answered by sonia b 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Im with your wife. My husband and I have what you call "spontaneous sex". They are now 3 and 4 but were once,younger. Use your best judgement. If theyre safe and entertained,than go for it. Itll be fine.
2006-11-13 03:02:38 · answer #6 · answered by TrofyWife 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Go for it. My kids are 8, 4 & 2, and there are ways to have sex and not get caught. Believe me. Just be quiet about it.
2006-11-13 03:05:12 · answer #7 · answered by Jessie P 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
go ahead and please your wife while the kids are awake just make sure the kids are entertained by the TV or a game or something, or u can take "naps" in the afternoon like right after lunch when the kids will whined down
2006-11-13 03:03:06 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I say as long as you can do it and not get caught go for it. Sex needs to be more like that and the risk taking adds to the excitement
2006-11-13 03:01:58 · answer #9 · answered by andyramvzb 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
put the 5 yr old in front of the TV and the 1 yr old down for a nap, and then go to it, just be quiet, and i am sure she will be happy for the spontaneity.
2006-11-13 03:02:50 · answer #10 · answered by blondie 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋