we jave 2 children and we both work full time. All I ask of him is to pick up after himself, and take the trash out, i do all the rest of the household duties. Is this to much to ask? I am busy with the kids, a 2 yr old and a 7 monthold.
2006-11-13 02:25:49 · 21 answers · asked by treecesherry 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Is it to late to answer that question "i've being going out with this guy............should we get married?"
2006-11-13 02:28:02 · answer #1 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you find the perfect answer. Let me know. Been there. Done that. Asking him to do something around the house was like asking him to cough up a lung. I took care of the kids and kept the house clean. I didn't complain because at the time he was working and I wasn't. I felt I was doing my share. Then at night and on the weekends. He would fool around, play video games and watch TV. While my day still went until 11:00pm.
I got fed up. I realized he felt as though his day was done. He punches in and out. Where to hell was my time clock.
So one day after he got home. I had already fed the kids, finished the house work and plunked down in front of the TV. He came home saw there was no dinner. He asked where it was. I showed him the time card I had made. I punched in at 6:30 am and punched out at 4:30 pm (A nice ten hour day) He grudgingly made himself something to eat.
The next day was saturday. I gave the kids cereal, which normally I made an almost hunters breakfast ever wekend. By the time he got up, we were watching cartoons. He looked for breakfast and made a comment about the house work. I said it's the weekend. You get weekends off so should I.
Things started to change after this. He was more helpful and a weekend without me doing anything. He saw how much I do.
2006-11-13 10:46:26 · answer #2 · answered by Balou 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It must be stressful for you. However you shouldn't lose your cool, you should compose yourself and then let him know what you have been doing all these while.
Lay the cards out on the table (figure of speech), and tell him that what his duties are little compared to what you are currently doing.
I say that communication is rather, or, really important.
You both have to talk, let him know how you feel, but also knowing that both of you had a long day, tension will rise, but like I said, keep your cool.
I hope things will turn out better for you!
All the best!
2006-11-13 10:29:26 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband and I don't have kids and he is the same way. I don't mind. I pick up after him and do the laundry, dishes and clean the house. I do it because of two reasons 1) if I lived alone, I would have to do it anyway and 2) he pays all the bills so I am grateful for that. Both of us work as well.
2006-11-13 10:28:48 · answer #4 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No it is not too much to ask of him. He should be doing more if the both of you are working and you have two kids..their his too. Stop making his dinner, doing his laundry, etc, until he gets the hint that he has to contribute to the upkeep of the house as you can not do it all. If he doesn't get it, he will when he has no clean clothes and gets hungry. Hard lesson, but if he won't help you out, it's his problem.
2006-11-13 10:34:15 · answer #5 · answered by mayihelpyou 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Quit cooking for him and cleaning for him. Take care of yourself and make sure you go out (without the kids) once a week. You are enabling him to continue this behavior and it is doing neither of you any good. Do you want to have your children think that Dad's are bums? That is what you are teaching them. IF they grow up with this behavior then they will either be like that or look for a mate like that.
2006-11-13 10:30:54 · answer #6 · answered by TMAC 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, that not much to ask at all. I go through the same thing with my fiance and he just stays glued to that computer and his cell phone (his work cell phone). I just figure that he has a mind that he isn't interested if it isn't on his agenda so I just negelct everything else and let him feel the pinch. However, I think it's an ongoing cylce with men period!
2006-11-13 10:29:14 · answer #7 · answered by souljagirpart2 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I sort of agree with the "no sex" too tired for it thing but some guys just don't care. Be extra sweet in asking him to do things. Encourage and compliment him when he helps. As in " I like when you help pick up the dirty clothes, it's a big help!"
2006-11-13 10:29:19 · answer #8 · answered by nanny4hap 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This may near kill you but go on strike. Only do what is necessary to care for your children and feed yourself. Dont cook for him,dont clean up after him. When his laundry is dirty and his stomache is growling,maybe he'll get the point. If not,go on about caring for you and your kids until he starts helping out.
2006-11-13 10:29:10 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like you got a problem. If it persist call me 999-448- 3211, I'll do you right. just kidding. try talking to him without accusing him, ask if it is possible to set up some mutual list of chores.
2006-11-13 10:29:49 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you tell him that if he doesn't start helping, what you are doing now, you can do on your own and he can pay you child support while your doing it. Maybe that will open his eyes. Remind him that you don't need him, but that you want him.
2006-11-13 10:28:44 · answer #11 · answered by mag 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋